Was I wrong?

When I look back at the turn of events it still feels as surreal to me now as it did then. I am a 28 year old professional now living in USA. My family moved here during my school days so I believe I have enjoyed the best of both worlds. Strong cultural foundation with a liberal level headedness – a balance that allows me to continue to look forward without letting me forget my heritage. Family values were ingrained in all of us and were taught that family comes first. We lived in suburbs in a Desi community with other Indian and Pakistani families. Several of my relatives lived in the neighborhood so we never felt that we were away from home.

This experience involves my cousin, Sonia who happens to be a year older than me and is my mom's sister's daughter. My mother's family is very close-knit so there were a lot of family gatherings and although everyone had their own place, it was almost like living in a join family. Sonia and I got along fairly well. We were a group of almost 10 around the same ages, we to the same school, and at times studying together. The older cousins helped the younger ones with homework. Life was good. As we were finishing high school, it was norm that we would enroll in the state university which happened to be in the same city. Sonia graduated a year before me and enrolled in the business program for her BS. I was a fairly good student and my high school and placement tests allowed me a scholarship to go out of state. This was a first and I jumped at the chance, not only because I was going to a better school, but also this would be my first real taste of freedom.

I went out of state and enrolled in the engineering program (hey I am Desi after all!). College life was great. I made many great and fast friends. I lived with another couple of guys in an off-campus apartment. We studied hard and we played hard. Had our share of parties and of course our share of all-nighters. But all through this, I kept in touch with everyone back with regular visits, phones, emails. Sonia and I exchanged our share of emails and phones and with time we realized that we could relate better with each other than anyone of our other cousins. We actually became friends – best friends infact.

During my third year, as Sonia was preparing to graduate, her professors started to encourage her to go into a graduate program. She started shopping around for a university with assistantship opportunities and actually received one from my university. Her parents were hesitant to send her out of state but knowing that I was there too, they gave her the OK. So, when I started my final year, Sonia joined my university as a Doctoral student.

I helped her find an apartment in the same complex and she found a couple of desi girls for roommates. As this was my final year, I was extremely busy stressing over finals and of course my graduate school programs. I wasn't able to spend that much time with Sonia, but all of us (me, Sonia, and our roommates) usually ate dinner together, especially on the weekends. Towards the end of the year, my professor gave ma a full scholarship to get my doctorate by doing research for him so I readily accepted. One of my roommates got the same deal, but the other one decided to join the work force. So my future was set for the next 4-5 years. I took the summer off and went home. I spent the first half traveling and enjoying my break and during the second half the family decided to have a reunion party to Sonia flew back too for the rest of the summer.

When the summer ended, Sonia and I decided to drive to the university together. It was a very long journey but we decided to make an adventure out of it. We took rest stops and nature breaks, listened to songs, but most we talked a lot about the three years we had missed out. She got me caught up with her life. We talked about family politics and, of course, we talked about relationships. As expected I started teasing her about potential affairs and she just said, "you think I'm going to get a chance for a boyfriend with the whole family on my back!"

I said "touché"

"But I bet you have had your share of girlfriends haven't you" she quipped.

Starting to feel a bit hot under the collar "I said, well let's just say I've grown up a lot on my four years in college and had my share of fun." Since just started laughing with that intriguing look on her face.

Anyway, the year started and both were back to our lives. We had our circle own of friends but we hung out a lot more together. Either in groups or just us. I'm very physically active so I got her started on going to the gym. She was already in great shape but gym is a great place for stress relief and relaxations. I trained her on lifting weights for toning and she was always an avid swimmer. Probably why she was so graceful all the time. Soon, she was looking like a total knock out. In fact that became more evident by the constant teasing remarks that both our roommates started giving her.

Well this is where is all went on a tangent. One day while in the gym, Sonia pulled her upper back muscle and totally stiffened her back. She had trouble lifting her arms and also moving her neck. The University doctor said that as a muscular injury it would take time to heal and she needed massage therapy. She was scheduled for massages with the nurse two times a week. Her therapy went for a moth but her progress was slow. She was almost always in pain and starting to get depressed. Since her physical activities were limited she spent most her time in school or at the apartment.

One weekend while watching a late night movie with the group at my place her back really started hurting and I noticed her eyes welling with tears, so I took her to my room and make her lie down. Looking at her I decided to stay with her and I started consoling her. As a very active person myself, I was no stranger to muscular injury and so I offered to massage her back. I had learned a few tricks from my oriental friends with whom I used to take martial arts. So I had Sonia lie on her stomach and started gently massaging her back while chatting idly.

This was the first time I had touched Sonia in this manner and I must admit her body felt wonderful to my fingers. She was dressed in a t shirt and pajama pants. I could feel the tenseness of her muscles on her shoulder as I gently kneaded muscles in slow circles. She stopped crying and started to relax a little. I got up and reach for a tube of muscle relaxing cream (A heat cream like deepheat/Bengay called Icyhot). I applied some on my finger tip, and slid my hand under the t-shirt and started to apply the cream. I didn't want her t-shirt getting messy so I asked her to pull the t-shirt up. She hesitated a minute then pulled it up. She was wearing a black cotton bra. I continue to massage the cream into her muscles and could feel the relaxing to my touch.

At this point is where my hormones started clouding my judgment. I was enjoying massaging Sonia. He more I massaged, the sexier her back started to look, so I decided to give in to my devil and said "I'm started to mess your bra straps with the cream and I'm not able to massage you as well as I should. Mind unhooking it?"

She didn't move or say anything. Since she didn't outright reject the notion I pushed forward. "Let me turn the lights off."

Sonia turned hr head and looked at me. I was making a very concerned face desperate to hide my ulterior motives and said "I don't know…"

I looked around my room and found my bandana (long handkerchief) hanging on my study chair. "Let me blindfold myself, this way I won't see anything."

"How will you massage me?"

I just smiled as said "I massage with my hands and fingers, I don't need my eyes for it." Sonia smiled brightly and agreed readily.

I got up from the bed, grabbed the bandana and turn off the lights. The room was dimly light from the outside street lights, so I was walked back to the bed and tied the bandana around my eyes. "Ok, I'm ready" I said.

Sonia checked to make sure that I couldn't see anything, waving her hand in front of the eyes, holding up fingers and even checked to make sure my eyes were indeed covered. The she said ok. When I felt her back again the t-shirt was pulled up to her neck and her bra was unhooked and straps off her shoulders. I smiled to myself and started to massage her again. Feeling the totally uncovered back with my fingers making me feel hotter by the second. We continue to chat normally and after a while I said that t-shirt was covered her shoulder and suggested that she could take it off.

She said "I'm not getting topless"

I just said, "Well I can't see anything, and without your t-shirt I will be able to give you a much more thorough massage."

She was silent for a while and I could feel that she was seriously considering my offer. Finally she said "Ok, but please don't tell anyone."

I just said seriously "Sonia of course not. We're family!"

When she said she was ready, I could feel that not only was he t-shirt off, but her bra was off too. I could feel no traces of the straps as I ran my hands over the bra back, her shoulders, and down the sides of her arms. During the massage, I lifted the bandana from my left eyes high enough that I could see but if she were suddenly looked back, she won't know that it's off. In the dim light I could see the silhouette of back, and it was flawless. "My god" I gasped in my breath to myself, and started to knead my fingers over the inviting flesh. It took every ounce of strength I had to not bend down and kiss her back, her shoulders, and her soft supple neck. I decided that patience would be a virtue.

Our massage lasted for almost two hours and then I suggested that she get covered up, so I could drop her to her apartment and she can sleep. She dressed and then gave me a hug and a kiss on my cheek as thanks.

"I feel wonderful and relaxed. You really are good, mister!" Sonia said

"Well if it really helped your back then we can do this again tomorrow night." I hoped she would accept my offer.

"I would love another one"

"Great then same time, same place tomorrow" I smiled.

For the next time, I decided to leave my blinds undone a little bit to allow a little more light in. When Sonia came back to my room, she was dressed I a black t-shirt and pajama pants again. So I looked at her and picked up my bandana again. She said, "Same rules as last night, no peeking"

"Wouldn't dream of it" I lied.

I turned off the lights, waked to the bed and got blind again. Sonia said she was ready, and once again I started with the Icy/hot on my finger tips. Before applying the cream I ran my dry finger on her back, and she said "there is no bra. It would have gotten in the way, so I didn't wear one"

"Ok, good thinking" I said calmly but I was thinking, "Damn I would I could to seen u take your shirt off"

I started to rub the cream to her upper back and gently started to move my hands on slow circles around the knitted areas. Moving up to the back of the neck I started to massage her thin neck, and I could hear her started to relax. So I moved my eye cover again and this time could see the more clearly due to more light. Her skin was gorgeous. She was fair, toned, and extremely supple. I started ease the tension of her shoulders and slowly worked my way her arms. After what seemed like an hour I decided to move to the second phase.

I lowered my bandana again and I said "Let me change positions so I can concentrate on your shoulders and arms. They seem very tense."

"What do you want me to do" Sonia asked.

"Wait" I said. Moved to the edge of the bed next the wall and sat with back against the wall and my legs crossed. "Now sit in front of me with your back facing me"

So she did. I started to massage her pressure point again, making sure to pressure with just enough pressure to relax her but not too much. I didn't want her getting too alert. From her shoulder I moved up to her head and said "judging from the tenseness of your neck and shoulders I'm surprised u don't get headaches"

Sonia sounded surprised when she said "I do get them how did yow know"

"I know what I'm doing Sonia" I said. "You may be older, but I'm more experienced in getting hurt."

She laughed at this and said "Ok them use to experience and make me feel good".

That's all I needed to hear. I moved my hands from her shoulders to her head and started giving her a head massage. I pressed the back of her head and could feel her shudder.

"That feels good" She murmured

"Grab a pillow" I said. She did and gave it to me, I place it on my crossed legs and said "now lie on your back and rest your head on the pillow"

"Ok but no peeking" she said. Sonia laid her head on my lap and I started to massage her temples. I could feel her breathing easily and I moved my hands to her eye browns and sinuses.

I said "now keep your eyes closed, I don't want to poke a finger in since I can't see"

"OK" she said. I started to rub the bridge of her knows with the right hand and used my left hand to move the eye cover just a little.

Since I was looking down, I didn't need to move it too much, and then I saw them. Two of the most beautiful breasts I had ever seen. Not too big, but enough to start to fall on either side of her. Her nipples were dark, and surprisingly large. They weren't hard, but I didn't care. I wanted to hold her breasts, caress them, and feel the softness on my fingers, feel the heat on my palm. I wanted kiss her nipples, lick the dark circles with my tongue. Take the nipple in my mouth and suck gently so I could feel it harder to my touch. My desire became so intense that I instantly got a hard on and if it wasn't for the pillow, Sonia would have felt it poking at the back of her head.

I started to breathe and calm myself while continue to massage her head. Her eyes were closed and she was deeply relaxed. So I started to gently rub her face then down her neck and from of her shoulders. Her breathing deepened but she didn't move. I moved my hands to my side and started to massage the sides of her back just below he breasts. I leaned forwards and moved my hand forward and started to rub her stomach gently. She was extremely relaxed and I could feel her muscles easing. So I decided to chance it. I moved my hands back to her sides of her below the breast and massaged that area again. Then I moved my hands up and could feel the sides of her breast touch my hands. I saw her eyes flow open and her breathing stop. She could see that I couldn't see, but I stopped and whispered "Sorry".

She whispered "no it's ok"

I started to massage the sides of her breasts again and she started to breathe a little faster. He nipples were beginning to hard and she crossed her legs. I massed the sides and underside of her breasts gently. She let out a quiet sigh and I could see the conflict on her face developing so I didn't want to push it too much. So I moved back to her face and noticed that she had beads of sweat on her forehead. I smiled to myself.

"Let's call is a night" I said and she didn't say anything.

She got up and dressed. I took my blind fold off and go ff the bed. Sonia just looked at me and gave me a hug. She didn't let go and lingered for a few moments and I could tell that she was conflicted. She then whispered "I'm scared".

I whispered back "I'm here for you"

She asked "Promise?"

I replied "always!"

Sonia hugged me tighter and then kissed my cheek and just said "same time, same place tomorrow"

One our third night Sonia was once again dressed in black t-shirt and pajama pants. She looked apprehensive but didn't say anything.

I smiled and asked "ready?".

She just nodded, handed me my bandana and switched off the light. We sat on the bed and I covered my eyes again. She said she was ready and I applied the cream to her ver familiar and increasingly sexy back again. This time I could feel her tense even more and I knew she was thinking very hard. So I started to massage her gently and she started to relax. When we moved to the same position as the previous night with her back facing me and I pulled the cover up a little massaged her shoulders. Sensing that it was now or never, I gently pulled Sonia back so that she was resting of my chest and I started to gently run my finger down the side of the her arms and gently caressing them. I could tell she was comfortable, so I moved my hands to her front and start to caress her chest. She took a deep breath and she exhales a slight sound came out. I took that as a positive sign and ran my fingers down her sides of her back. I moved down and started to rub her stomach with my palms gently pressing my fingers up with each move moment. She moves her head a little. I uncrossed my legs and move them to either side of her. She palces her hands on my legs and gently started to rub them slowly. I moved my hands even finger and started to caress the underside of her breasts with mm finger tips. Sonia tense for a second then relaxed. I could feel her nipples started to tense up and her breathing get shallow. She crossed her legs and started to get a stronger grip on my legs.

Feeling that she was ready and expecting it, is gently cupped her breasts with my hands and gave them a gentle squeeze. Sonia moaned gently. Her breast felt heavy on my hands, and I would feel the heat generating from them. I start to squeeze the breasts and caressed them gently. I felt her nipples harder to my touch. I pressed my finger tips to nipples and started to roll it slowly. I took the nipples on my finger and gently pressed them. Another moan escaped. I rolled the nipples between with thumb and forefinger and gently pulled on them. This time a louder moan and I could see her shifting her legs. Sonia was getting exited.

I then bend my head and gently kissed neck and I continue to massage her breasts. she reached her hand back and started to rub her finger on my hair and I started to lick a trail up and down her neck. Sonia then turned her head, and while I was blindfolded, kissed me. Our lips connected and my mind exploded. I had kissed girls before, but nothing compared to this electrifying experience. Her lips were soft and hot. I pressed down harder on them and kissed her back in earnest. Our lips parts and our tongues touched. I gave her breasts another squeeze and Sonia responded by sticking her tongue deep into my mouth!

Then Sonia said "take off the blindfold. You might as well see what you're doing"

I take off my blindfold, looked at her, and kissed her. I looked at her this time with both eyes and said that she was literally the most beautiful woman I had seen. And I was serious. She turned over and kissed me again. I hugged her and eased her on the bed. I laid next to her and kissed her lips, I moved down and kissed her neck. I left a trail of butterfly kisses over her shoulders down to her chest down to her cleavage. Then I licked a trail from her cleavage almost to her right nipple then almost to her left one. I blew gently breaths on the nipples suddenly left her hand at the back of my head and pulled me into her nipples.

"Enough teasing" Sonia said. "I want u to show me how much experience you have!

"With pleasure" I replied eagerly. My hard on was really enlarging in my boxers now and was starting to tent out. But I knew Sonia was a virgin and there was no way I was going to rush into this and spoil it for this. This was just some girlfriend. This was Sonia, my cousin, my sister, and if she could trust me enough to get intimate with me, then I WAS going to make sure that she had the time of her life.

I started to suck on her nipple and I rolled my tongue over it. I felt it harden in my mouth and I gently nibbled on it. Sonia twitched and breathed in sharply. I started to suck on it in earnest while I brought my hand up and started to massage and carres ther other breast. I gently rolled the other nipples in my fingers while sucking on the first one. Then I pinched and bit the nipples at the same time,.