- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Things in the Distance.
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Click hereThings in the Distance Seem Much Bigger.
Those who have departed remain eternal;
heart-shaped red velvet pillows on the bed,
cherished and nurtured,
viewed and reviewed and never used.
The formers lurk in the shadows of the Halls of the Past,
familiar as a heartbeat,
a kiss, a touch, perfume;
he kissed you in the hall,
she touch me there,
they smelled of sandalwood...
I regret, re-embrace and live in the old romance;
courting, wooing and losing when I am alone.
The best of them haunt you every day,
in the details,
even in the happy now;
they add colour to the constant, even grey.
But even to go again would be different,
what was once, was once;
today I am a changing woman and yesterday I was still,
the they moved into the imagined future,
I am here in the now.
I wouldn’t want what I want if it was a gift...
- COMMENTS
EroticOrogenyalmost 15 years agoAlways those memories. Often for me not so good, the losing you note. I agree with 'touched', but I like the trailing off of the ellipsis. 'the they' in the fourth line of the last stanza seems awkward - why not drop 'the' ?
Thanks.
normal jeanalmost 15 years agoThis is a very personal work, or so it feels to me. I liked the images and in one spot, the hall, I felt as if I were there.
Line 9, I believe you might want to reconsider "touch" and replaced it with touched.and the ellipses at the end could be replaced by a period to make it more concrete. The way it is leaves it open for debate.
I read you yesterday, I believe and enjoyed. Hope to see more from you in the future.
~NJ
UnderYourSpellalmost 15 years agoAh yes the might have beens but will never be again no matter however much you might wish it. Thanks for a great read
