Get Your Man Into Eating Your Pussy

A lot of women love have their pussy licked as much as or even more than having a cock fill their cunt. And if you have a man who loves to go downtown every chance he can get, great! But what do you do if your man either won't do it, won't do it right or long enough or if he treats pussylicking as something obligatory and a mere prelude to sticking his cock up your twat? Well, don't just complain. As a guy who LOVES to give head, here's some advice about what you can do to get your man to adore eating you for as long as you can stand! First of all,

1. Initiate Sex:

Are you horny? Do you want his cock, his finger, his ass or especially his tongue: then let him know it! A lot of women, even if they're dripping wet and desperate to be sucked and fucked into oblivion, will wait for their man to initiate sex. Chances are that when that happens, a man is going to have his own agenda. But, why not start out with your agenda, instead of his?

So what if you're shy! Get over it! We know that women have moments when you want and even need sex. So tell us when that happens! If you're in a relationship, what on earth is the point of hiding your sexual needs? Is it some kind of weird power trip: if he knows you need sex, you can't ration it? That might have worked in the fifties, but surely we're way past that now. Besides, nothing will turn him on faster more than knowing that you want sex. So tell him! But how?

Words are best: nothing like an e-mail or a quick phone call to his office (provided it's private, if you need that) and a "Honey: I can't wait till you get home. My panties are sopping wet." Or "I'm so horny and my vibrator isn't doing it for me; I need you!" You can bet that he's going to blow off or rush through whatever overtime might have been in the offing (if he is the type who stays at work when he has a horny chick to come home to, what on earth are you doing with him in the first place?).

If you're reluctant to be that explicit you can always use all the tried and true chick come hither numbers. That's OK. But if your man is tired or depressed, he can miss the non-verbal cues, or worse, ignore them. Ignoring a verbal invitation is not an option for most men: 99 times out of a hundred he's going to accept, no matter how tired or down he is.

One final suggestion: a pre-arranged signal. One couple has a bride and groom from a wedding cake. When either one wants sex, they put it out where the other can see it: yes, it's really hokey, but it works.

So, why is so important for you to initiate sex? Because you score big, big points with your man just by initiating: men hate, let me repeat that, MEN HATE the burden of always having to initiate sex because unless you're hooking up with a nymphomaniac (whom most of us have never met, let alone screwed), initiating sex involves a certain probability (often quite a high probability) of rejection and attendant humiliation. When you initiate you instantly get your man's gratitude----and cooperation. And if he doesn't like to dive into your muff and polish your pearl, you will need some of that cooperation. So initiate already.

All right. You have your man racing to get into your panties. Now what?

2. Tell him---yes, TELL HIM in WORDS---what you want.

Now, I gave you (reluctantly) non-verbal alternatives to initiate sex. But there's no way around this one---you HAVE to say exactly what you want: "Honey, could you go down on me." "Honey, I need your tongue.." The more explicit and urgent the better: "Lick me!" "Eat me!" "Suck my pussy!" Especially, if you're somewhat prudish or restrained, the more graphic and desperate your language, the more you will turn your man on and, maybe get his head between your legs, fast.

But what do you do if your man refuses or expresses reluctance? (Amazingly, there are some guys who are grossed out by the thought of connecting their mouth to their woman's pussy). If he refuses or if all you can get is a quick kiss on the twat you'll have to settle for that-----temporarily. OK, let him do his thing and start your campaign.

3. Your campaign begins with talking (yes, you saw it right---a member of the male species telling to you to TALK to your man).

Personally, I am thrilled to talk to my partner about sex: it's so much more exciting and much closer to my heart than talking about kids or chores: but then I have an unbelievably open and understanding wife. And, as a bonus, it's often a huge turn-on to talk about sex, especially in public (discreetly or undiscreetly depending on how much of an exhibitionist you are).

Now I know that there are a lot of men---and women---who are too uptight or scared to talk openly to their partners about their love life. But I don't care if you have to go to a sex therapist to get a conversation going. If you're going to have a sexual relationship that lasts more than a few weeks, you need to be able to talk about sex with him. And the odds are overwhelming that he's NOT going to initiate that discussion. So first, accept the necessity of talking and second, figure out how to initiate it.

Once you have a conversation going, it's important to be gentle and supportive but also to let him know how you feel, what you like and what you want from him. Above all, avoid any hint of criticism or anger. Let him know you appreciate his willingness to be open and to meet your sexual needs.

First, remind him that it's not unhygienic to kiss your cunny: your bush is actually cleaner and more sanitary than his mouth (why else did God invent Listerine?). And reassure him that before you'll ask him to head south, you'll make sure you're really clean down there (please note that some of us men actually prefer that you not be overzealous about scrubbing your cunny, especially if you've been horny and wet all day; but that's another subject).

Second, let him know that (a) if the two of you are going to continue to have sex, then you want oral sex to be a part of it. (b) you're willing to take it slow and let him get acclimated; and (c) you don't want to expect to cum every single time he goes down on you, that he has the right to stop if he'd tired and that you don't want him to carry on heroically to get you to cum when his jaw is falling off.

It's way better to express your needs and wants directly than to abandon or suppress them or even worse fight him passively aggressively. Once you stated your position, it also helps if you let him know that you'll be patient and help him get through the awkwardness and that you appreciate his willingness and his commitment to satisfying you. And there are plenty of books and how-to articles (and yes, videos) that you can use to help initiate him into the ancient art of satisfying his woman with his tongue. You could start with some excellent pieces on cunnilingus in this "How To" section. Let him know, that you're willing to reciprocate (he'll be on really shaky ground if he likes having you suck his cock but he won't lick your pussy!).

Finally, you need to talk about is what turns you on sexually. If something has worked and he's done it right, let him know it----verbally, non-verbally, anyway at all. Just make it obvious that he's had an effect. Don't fake it or exaggerate too much. But do let him know what gets your juices flowing.

(An Aside about Pussy Juice).

Speaking of juices, there's no way to avoid having him deal with your nectar. To me, my wife's pussy juice (I suspect that many men feel the same way about their partner's juice) is the elexir of life, the yummiest, most delicious, most aphrodisical liquid in the universe, BETTER THAN CHOCOLATE (can you imagine???). If your man is not one of that group (and he'd better have a lot else going for him if he isn't), then you will have to initiate him into one of the principal joys of oral sex.

My experience is that most of you have at least some and maybe a lot of anxiety about how you taste and smell down there. And there are some times when your cunny might not taste or smell great. Start by finding out yourself. That means, to put it bluntly, you need to taste and smell your pussy more than once. If you're not comfortable doing that, how can you expect your man to be?

Now I can't speak for every single one of us men, but I think most of us are probably turned off by the smell of urine and execrement and the thought of swishing those in our mouths (not to mention your monthly flow). So try to eliminate those, but---please don't try to cover up with scented soaps or deodorants. I'm sorry, but even those of us who are not as totally nuts about pussy juice as I am, do not want to be sniffing—or worse, tasting--scented fruit soap or perfume in your nether regions. The idea here is to get your man to want the taste and smell of your cunt, not the latest Proctor and Gamble product.

Once you know that there are obnoxious experiences for him down below, then you need to start stage two of your campaign.

4. The Campaign, Stage Two: Practising Kissing, Licking and Sucking.

OK, enough about talking and testing, let's get back to sex! The best way to get your man started on the road to great cunnilingus, it to draw the connection in his mind between kissing and oral sex. Now that may be obvious to you, but, trust me, it's not obvious to a lot of men (I was one of them). A great many women complain that their partners are not into kissing, don't seem to enjoy it and don't do it very well. You CAN change that (yes, you can). Start by assessing your own kissing skills: are you completely passive, waiting for the man to plant the lip lock on you? Do you swoop in and peck at your partner with wild abandon? Neither one of those approaches is going to convince your man that kissing is a rewarding part of sex to be enjoyed its own right and not just as a necessary means to get his wiener into your bun.

The first time I understood the mindblowing potential of a kiss was a few years ago after an obligatory lunch at a rooftop hotel dining room with a lady friend whom I had and have absolutely no desire to bed (I'm happily married and I want it to stay that way). She obviously had other ideas. As we took the elevator down to the floor where her room was (no, I didn't get out), she reached up and gave me the most seductive, the most tender, the most erotic kiss---ever!. Now, I've kissed a number of women (the order of magnitude will remain hazy in the interests of preserving my marriage). But that kiss was a revelation. It was an invitation, a . . . . words fail me. Can you kiss like that? If not, start practicing (this is something that you and your women friends can definitely discuss—and maybe even practice). And then take the initiative. Show your man what soft, tender, lengthy kisses can be like. If you blow his mind, you'll be on your way to having him blow your twat!

Once you have him started understanding and enjoying kissing, then get him into kissing, sucking and licking your tits as an activity that is pleasurable in itself rather than just as a prelude to intercourse (if you don't like having him play with your tits, then just skip this section). Now I haven't had hundreds of sex partners, but in my experience, very few women actively encourage their partners to suck and lick their tits, and that's what you need to do.

Take your breast and actually rub it on his face. Play with your nipple on his lips. Moan appreciatively when something he does turns you on. Above all---tell him what works, what does turn you on and gently guide him: "softer (or harder)", "bite me gently!" "yes, keep going!". As long as what he's doing is even mildly pleasurable for you, keep him at it for as long as you can! This is training, and you want him well trained when you send him south! He needs to find out how to use his mouth and lips tenderly, how to prolong the pleasure, how to keep you on the edge. Every moment spent giving your tits pleasure is great preparation for him making love to your cunt and great training for you in communicating what turns you. So don't be in a hurry to send him down to the engine room before of you are properly trained and ready to perform your respective tasks!

When YOU, are ready, then you can give him permission to move further south (not all the way just yet; you guys have more practicing to do). This is where you learn to TELL him what to do, and make it whatever might turn you on. What you have him do is strictly up to you, but at this stage keep it relatively short. He could kiss your stomach, lick your thighs, roll his face on your mound; just as long as he keeps his face and his hands out of your crotch until you give the word. If what he does isn't doing anything for you, cut it short and get his face into your pussy.

(An Aside on Shaving)

I'm totally with Sophia Jane ("A Girl's Guide to Getting Head") in the camp of do whatever is comfortable for you. If you don't mind shaving and you like the way it feels and looks, go for it! If shaving makes you itchy but you don't want a full bush, trim away. If you don't want to be bothered with shaving or trimming, by all means flaunt your beaver! The point is that YOU need to be comfortable with how your pussy looks and feels, and when you're comfortable, it's easier for your man to be comfortable with your pussy too.

And don't be defensive about your choice. Either way has its rewards for your man. Yes, I love the incredibly soft and delicate feel of licking a shaved pussy. (Feeling a woman's soft swollen labia with my lips is any unbelieveably thrilling part of oral sex!) And it's a definite turn on to be able to see a pair of engorged cunt lips or a hungry aroused clit emerging from its hood and begging to be sucked. But it's also great to feel a sopping wet bushy beaver desperately thrashing against my face. And a hairy cunt definitely seems to give off more delectable pussy smell! So, both shaved and full bush or anything in between, has its joys for the male tribe. It's your choice: experiment and go with what feels right for you, and if you want to change it, change it!

5. The Campaign: Stage 3:

OK, his face is between your thighs. What now?

I know you may feel incredibly vulnerable in this position. But you need to remind yourself that you are the boss. If you man is inexperienced or repulsed by oral sex, you need to take charge and tell him what to do: namely, whatever he pleases you. Start by keeping it slow and simple. The first thing both he and you need to learn is how he can tease you. So have him experiment and tell him what works. You might have him stay away from your clit at first, and lick and kiss delicately around your outer lips, your mound and your perineum. Some women like to have their man take their whole cunt into their mouth; for others, that does absolutely nothing. Some woman adore having their man tonguefuck their cunt hole. For others, it's an annoyance. You need to tell him what's working, what starts the juices flowing for you. And you and your man need to keep reminding yourselves to take your time, take it slow and not rush towards orgasm.

If you're like most women, it feels better to be teased with a very light touch of his tongue. He needs to be guided to do that.. It took me a long time, a lot of practice (oh, the sacrifice!) and a lot of communication to be able to achieve the kind of light touch that delights my partner and sends her into orbit. But it's definitely worth it! (Note: you may need to remind your man to keep his mouth and tongue wet. Don't hesitate to give those kinds of reminders. It's much better that your man knows that than that you are uncomfortable.)

You may want your man to use his hands to hold your pussy wider. You'll need to tell him how much force to use. Some women love their pussies are wide enough so that they can easily tongue-fucked. Others don't. Also, some women like to have a man push his hand on their stomach. To others, that's a distraction. Either way is fine with us: just tell us what works.

Most women (but you may be the exception) want to be thoroughly teased and aroused before their man starts working on their clit. You need to tell him when the time is right and how you like your clit to be stimulated. Some women like a man to start by holding their clit gently in his mouth and then very gently flicking it with his tongue. Other women are so turned on at his stage that they prefer a harder touch or even a light nibble.

Again you need to communicate what works for you. And when you get to the point, where you can't stand being teased and you have to cum, your man needs to know that he has to hang in there and not break his concentration or his rhythm until either you cum or one of you has to give up.

At some point many women want their partner to use their finger or fingers in addition to their tongue. If you're among those, you need to make it clear when that would be good. For some women, especially those who get wet easily, it doesn't matter too much if a finger goes in very early. For others who need to be really turned on to have their juices flow, it might be painful to have their man's finger up their cunt too soon.

You also need to tell him what kind of digital stimulation works best for you. Some women love a vigorous fingerfucking. Others hate it. Some like their man to rub their clit with his finger. Others want a tongue exclusively. Almost every woman I know adores a soft, slow, gentle stimulation of their g-spot. A man needs some guidance to be able to do that. So give him that guidance: it will be well worth it. In my experience, a woman's orgasm is much, much more intense when both her clit and her g-spot are being stimulated at the same time.

When I do that right and I'm lucky, I'll get not just a squirt but a great gush of pussy juice right in my face. Now, there seem to be some men who are disgusted by the thought of their woman cumming all over their face (of course, they can't expect to be able to squirt semen on your face if they won't allow you to give them a facial). If your man absolutely can't tolerate your squirting on his face, you may have to draw the line there (although maybe he can compromise by letting you cum on his chest).

Fortunately, there are a huge number of men who absolutely live to give you the best tongue licking possible and take it as a personal compliment if you squirt on their face. This is such a turn-on for me that when it happens, I literally can cum without touching my cock! I can't tell you how much I adore the feel, the smell and the taste of pussy juice all over my face and in my hair!

I just hope that at least some of what I have written above will help you train your man to enjoy diving into your muff and giving you mindblowing oral sex.