I Loved You Once

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I loved you once, and I failed.
My desire burned bright
to light every night we spent together.
There was no plan, no idea
for any length of tomorrows,
just what I wanted: you, now.
My desire mattered most:
beyond thought,
beyond safety,
beyond good sense,
beyond what was good for you.

I wasn't good for you,
after I got over being angry with you
for dumping me,
I got angry with me.

So I left everything:
my job, my life,
my childish dreams,
all worthless, all dead,
I killed them, and scattered the leftover dust.

I hope the best for you always,
everything Dolly Parton sang
to Porter Waggoner about and more.
I've become someone else,
the one who loved you so stupidly is
now long buried.

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