- Erotic Poetry
- Dark Delight
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Click hereshe loves to watch him run
always dressed in black, he’s a puma
all surging muscle and striking energy
his movements are hypnotic, instinctively timed like a metronome
as he gets hot and sweaty, she gets wet
she prays to be prey.
- COMMENTS
DeepGreenEyesabout 14 years agoYou've created a poem of coiled erotic tension, vrosej; I can see it, feel it. "all surging muscle and striking energy." Terrific.
buttersabout 14 years agoloving your last line best of all :)
yeah, i'd pare the odd word for streamlining, though tbh i didn't look to see if there was a syllabic count or form requiring the extras.
nice visuals, vj!
EroticOrogenyabout 14 years agoCould probably pare a few words for more impact:
'an instinctively timed metronome'
and could drop a word here and there in other lines.
