Revelation

Revelation

How come she left a pair of panties on her bed? She has never done it. I have been going in her room for last 3/4 years, every morning, when she leaves for the shop. Every morning I find her room done like a hotel suit. Since I have never seen her panties on this decent display – which was unintentional for sure – it never came to me how thrilling the site of my sister's panties could be. Panties! No, they have never been in my fantasy. Perhaps, because I am young, I am decent, I am romantic. I picture her always in the conservative business suits she wears for work and in the decent robes she wears in the house, or at best in her natural profile: a goddess-like slender face, two big round breasts, a spread-out lady-like gorgeous ass, long tapered legs, two delicate feet – nothing is disproportionate; my sister is tall and her physical fortunes have perfectly been set in her healthy, slender body. Her image in my mind – I'd better say in my heart – is that of a rare mythical goddess: asexual, spiritual, or maternal, at least. It's true that I have been in love with her for many years, and don't forget I'm young. But sex never intruded in my love as a major enemy.

I entered her room, I breathed in on her pillow for the scent of her hair, I lay where she lies. It has become a ritual for me. And yes, every morning and evening I jack off thinking of her. But like most of the guys of my age, I have never thought of doing those kinds of sexual things with her which are supposed to be normal in a session of masturbation. Thinking of her during my gratifying sessions comes in a swoon. I stroke my cock, and think that I am hugging my sister as I am going to sleep, and I feel my love for her. It's my own platonic sex with my sister. But this is only in my imagination. To tell the truth, I've never been able to think of her as a sexual being. This is because, perhaps, I love her so much and I have such deep respect for her that I am incapable of thinking of her being naked, or doing the kind of things that sex commands. All these things of deep feel are also a kind of revelation to me. A revelation inspired by the pair of panties I discovered this morning at one side of my sister's pillow. It was so shocking, so unexpected that this is the first day since its beginning I did not lie on my sister's bed just to feel her in one of many ritualistic swoons I am capable of undergoing thinking of my sister.

Aha, HER PANTIES. A white conservative pair of panties. They're sprawling beside her pillow. They're cotton and they're trimmed with some fine white laces. It's not that I often don't steal a glimpse at panties while passing by a lingerie shop. But I have never seen or thought that a pair of panties could be this beautiful. It's, in fact, my sister's taste. Even in her undergarments, she maintains some fashion, some decency.

I took the netted fabric in my hand. I touched the soft cotton as if it is a fragile living being. If I squeeze it, my sister will be hurt. I caressed the material between my palms, gently rolling. It was still warm from her body. And clean. She must have worn it a few days. Yet it was as clean as the one from the washing, except for her smell on it. No, it did not smell of anything raw, at least I didn't think so. It was radiating some unknown fragrance. It's as if a gate closing a piece of garden in a corner of paradise opened to my nose. The fragrance is more defined, and sweeter, at the crotch. I became jealous for unknown reason. If Cologne produced an aftershave of this smell, I would use it for the rest of my life. I could not but touch the depth of the crotch with the tip of my tongue. A watery fluid seeped into the hollow of my mouth from all corners of my mouth-walls and an irresistible force drove the flood toward the tip of my tongue. A holy spirit made it known clear, the fluid wanted to reach the part of the fabric that covered my sister's sex. Thus the crotch became wet. Once it was wet I could not resist to chew on it. And chew I did, unashamedly, voraciously; nobody was my witness; I gave in to my long-suppressed and hitherto unknown fetish. My own saliva became my sister's after it swam across the crotch of her holy panties as many times as I sucked in and out the fragrant and sensual material inside my mouth. The thrill was all-encompassing. Down my black-belt belly, between my thighs, I became so hard that I could club to death all the oppressors of the world with my proud brotherly cock.

I upturned the material to get better access to the sweetness in the crotch. Yes the inside was sweeter, darker, more aromatic, and more tangible to my taste. My previous ministration from the other side of the crotch seemed a waste of time. I chewed and sucked on it so arduously that the material threatened to become as dry as it had been before I kissed it. Then I daren't to suck on it any longer, because I needed it wet. I held the elastic band, I shook the panties to flatten the fabric. A golden hair rolled down on and clung to the crotch. It had hidden itself somewhere up the crotch.

I caught and hold the hair as a talisman. One single pubic hair of my sister, hardly an inch and a half long and curved like a half-moon, it was difficult to hold in my hand. I tried to get its smell and I found nothing. I chewed it, a sharp thread of dry silk cut through my tongue. It least I could touch my sister through this hair. I wished it had been dipped in her perspiration or gilded with a layer of century old sand assembled between her legs. But it was not possible. My sister is not only a paragon of beauty, but also a paragon of purity and cleanliness. I became a libertine at the touch of this God-blessed hair. I ran to my room holding the hair in my one hand and the panties in the other. I closed the door. First I put the hair in the pocket of one my shirts. I would decide on it later on. I threw my t-shirt and boxer away. I flattened my sister's panties and wrapped my rock-hard cock with it. Ahah, what bliss. The wet crotch of my sister's panties is wrapping the front of my cock. I prayed to God. I became religious, at such early age. I delved into my wild imagination. Is not it possible, if God willing, someday, the same way, my sister's sacred vagina enwrap my rigid penis with the same warmth, same intimacy.

The hair is still in my pocket. I don't know what to do with it. One thing I am sure of. I will preserve this, like the mummified pharaoh Tutankhamen. I will preserve this pubic hair of my sister in a gold chamber so that brothers in the twenty-eighth century know how much I loved my sister.

***

"My Holy Brother," Anja sighs, embracing the diary into her bosom. "Where is he?" she shudders, as if he has died, or disappeared. He's off for basketball. A small sigh of relief escapes her bone-deep beautiful countenance, hued red by one after another tormenting blushes. Holding the elegant dairy, which she has given him on his 18th birthday for writing his poems, Anja enters her room. She opens the wall-length window of her bedroom. The air in the garden pours into the room and caresses her red face with autumnal cool and absorbs the heat produced by the shocking revelation in her brother's diary. The cool air sooths her nerves.

Winter is not far away. Anja loves this time of the year. Being a very romantic girl, she welcomes winter, darkness, rain, and gloom. The winter exposes her to a world which lightheaded girls of her age hate. Winter is a world inside a world and Anja loves to drift herself along its course. But Anja enjoys autumn, which none of her acquaintances take any heed of, which is to them just the final days of sandy summer.

With the air, comes along ripe light of late afternoon. Her sumptuous bedroom invites the glassy light to shower and worship its mistress. The bedroom window opens to its private garden. There is nobody to see her if she were naked. Anja closes the curtains only at night when she sleeps. Every morning before bath, she undresses, slides the deep-blue glasses open, and spends time in the nude and enjoys the flowers outside her window. She feels equally pure, original, and delicate.

Now Anja's old, innocent, and romantic world is shaken to the root by the fateful diary. The young poet, who happens to be her brother, who she has been raising with maternal love since the death of their father five years ago, has violated her person and purity. She was late for work this morning and forgot to put her discarded panties in the laundry. It's no fault of his. It's hers. No, she doesn't feel wicked or sinful. Robert loves her. She loves Robert more than anything else in the world, much more than William, her scientist lover, who gets embarrassed to look directly at her loins.

"Where's the hair?" Anja rocks again. But she doesn't dare to go to his room and check for herself his pockets to discover the strand of her pubic hair. 'William, cursed William,' Anja cries, 'doesn't have time even to have a look at my private parts. Here my brother has stolen a strand of my pubic hair and already decided to preserve it for the brothers of the posterity.'

Anja discards her dresses. She takes off her blazer and puts it up in the cupboard. She takes off her vest, her slack, her tee-shirt. With gentle movements, she takes off her bra and panties, and puts them in the right places. She sits on the coach facing the garden. She looks at the flowers: rose, carnation, and gardenia. She looks away. She looks up. She looks down. Shaking, she looks at her loin. Her legs are splayed.

Strands of golden hair, none longer than two inches, form rings and ringlets and adorn the white skin of her groin. The strands seem a strip of land in the desert adorned with blond grasses. Yes, it's beautiful, Anja blossoms like a flower in her garden. Why it's so beautiful, my pubic hair? She asks herself. Yes, I am seeing it through the eyes of my brother.

Anja shakes with an unknown fear. Her clitoris rises like a small sand dune, as she looks at it from above. My pussy lips, she whimpers. Why my pussy lips are so live? These pussy lips, which flip on William's insensitive cock like the dead petals of a floating flower, are now like the healthy petals of a plump rose on the tree. 'My brother, the poet,' Anja murmurs.

Anja touches her sex. It is incredibly moist. She stoops and has a better view. Moisture congregated on them as the flower-petals collect dews from evening fog. Each of her delicate portal forms the breast of a sea-shell.

'I'm beautiful,' Anja gazes at her tapered legs and blossoms like a wild flower. Her healthy calves twitch. Her toes feel like lurching. She looks at the bright red nail polish on her slender toes and her toes curl. The soft muscles on her healthy thighs sing and dance. William is going away to take up his new job at NASA. She loves William. William is adamant to finish the marriage before he leaves. The poor scientist suffers from jealousy and insecurity.

Anja is jealous of the flatness of her own belly. Her navel has a graceful depth. With it's dark hollowness, the belly-button is a ripe bud of a pink rose. Her breasts are pointed. They are rare kind of breasts, form half-boats defying gravity in youth, and reach full banana shape in maturity. Anja touches extremely soft strands in her armpits, unshaved for a month. She thinks of the hair in her brother's pocket and strokes the short wisps under her arms. She takes the dairy and presses its hardness on her bare breasts. She tortures her aroused nipples with the sharp edges. She is surrounded by fear. William, sin, responsibility. But she feels good. In fact, she has never felt happier.

***

Robert meets Anja in the dining. She was waiting with tea and pasta and sausages for him. Why she is so red, he asks himself. It's perhaps her forthcoming marriage. My sister values family.

"Have you met William today?" he asks, taking his seat opposite her.

"I have met my destiny."

She seems tart. Robert puts things together. 'She's sorry to leave me,' he thinks. Her morose look draws some consciousness and he feels like to be protective of his elder sister.

He has washed and he is extremely clean. Anja appreciates her brother. "Rob," Anja mutters. "You are my brother."

Robert's heart jumps. Has she read the diary? He has not written anything explicit, or has he? It could be explained in more than one way. Yet he blushes.

"But you are more than that. After papa's death, I raised you like a son. You know I am not going to have a kid of my own and I have made it clear with William."

What's the matter? Is she gone insane?

"I have become accustomed to our life together. Now William asks me to go with him to the States. I am scared of foreign land, Robert. I like my bedroom, my garden, and this house. I love the shop. I love you. I don't know how can I live in a foreign land without everything dear to me?"

"But sis, you value family. You love William. You must have your own life. I am now adult. I can run the shop. I can look after myself."

"You are still very young, boy," Anja admonishes.

Anja pushes her plate away. She pours tea in Robert's cup and slides it to him. He is so fresh and clean. She thinks, looking at his lips, gently touching the hot teacup.

"Have you composed any new poem?" Anja asks.

Robert is shy. Something must have happened, Robert knows from the way his sister is squirming. The only thing happened was that he wrote something about her in his dairy.

"Give me one second, Sis," Robert says. He goes to his room and looks for his diary. It's not in the shelf. "It's it," he shudders. He doesn't dare to return to the dining table. But he has to. He has never suffered from such indignity. He was caught red-handed writing diary about his sister.

He returned gloomier. H pushes the teacup away, drawing clear sigh of concern from his sister.

"Your diary is in my room," Anja says. There is no reprimand in his voice.

"I have decided to give you all my pubic hair. I don't want you preserve only one strand. What love for your sister, kid?" Anja smirks.

Robert stands looking at the floor, like a burglar in front of the police officer.

"But you have to tell me, what's so interesting about your sister's pubic hair? I am sure you have never seen it."

Robert is desperately trying to understand whether his sister is angry. She is not giving a hint in this line. She has high moral values. That's all he fears.

"Look at me, Robert," Anja gently pushes up his chin with her index finger. The protective maternal instinct takes over her. Robert's face is bright red with humiliation. "It's different when you see one hair in my panties. But they are not as nice as when they are together." Anja smiles.

"It's not right, sis, to humiliate me so much for such a small thing," Raul says.

"What would be the big thing, brother? If stealing her panties and masturbating on them is not a big deal then what? Raping your sister?"

"What is wrong in it, Anja. I love you. You don't know how much I care about you. I can't think of any other girl. All my friends are screwing around while I weep fantasizing you. I know I cannot touch you. This is wrong. You are my elder sister. You are so good to me. But, but..." Tears well up from Roberts eyes.

Robert's suffering touches Anja. Her vision blurs looking at her kid brother. She has never let her suffer from anything. No elder sister, she is 7 years older, would have done so many things for a brother. If only she could do this also for him. But it is against normalcy.

"Robert, it's not normal for a brother to love his sister the way you fantasize. You may fantasize your sister being your girlfriend. But it will only complicate your trouble. A sister can't give her brother what a girlfriend can. This is against normal practice. I want you to have a normal life. To go around. To mix with the girls. You are handsome. You are intelligent. You write romantic poems. Look at me. I go out with William because I want to be normal. It's not that I love him very much. Yet I have sex with him because this is normal. You must also have sex. Sex is a necessity. You can't simply wallow on it fantasizing your sister. Besides, I'm too old for you."

Robert's heart is cut asunder by her last statement. It's as if only her being 7 years older is the only reason she cannot love her brother. He has been listening to her with rapt attention, although what she has been saying is banal persuasions.

Anja notes the Pain in Robert's eyes. "Robert, what do you find interesting in as old a woman as I am," she begs.

Robert is angry with himself for not finding a suitable response. He looks at her bare arms, her bust, and her calves. Her skin is smooth like a baby's. Her face has a youthful maturity, but she doesn't look like a 26 years old girl. The outsiders can't understand who is younger between the two. This is because Robert has overgrown his age. His beard, his mustache, his chest-hair all grew very early.

"Look at your skin Anja, look at your calves, you arms. Your skin is soft and smooth like a 13 years old girl's."

"This flatter will give you nothing," she scolds.

Gradually, Anja makes her decision. It's for him, she thinks. I can't let my brother suffer. I'm not afraid of it. I will ask him few more questions. If he is okay with it, I will not hold it any more. I need his love.

"Incest makes people abnormal. You cannot stop it once you start. You have to live with it all your life. You are too young to make such a big decision."

Anja is serious in her discourse. She wants to make him an adult in a moment's dissertation, to, as if, caution him so that he can never blame her when he wants to.

"Everywhere in this world a man is adult when he is 18. They can be a minister, a lawmaker. They can vote. They are hanged if they kill at 18. So why can't I take my decision at 19?"

"Because you are to decide on something forbidden, something which society considers wrong, something which has no escape."

"Anja, what I fear most IS an escape from it, once I get it. Although it completely depends on you. If you are happy with William, it's okay with me. Even five minutes earlier, I haven't thought I would claim you as my girl. Now it's a possibility. You have brought it forward. Don't back down, Sis."

Robert imploration touches Anja. She is a very sexy girl. She has never had an opportunity to explore the many possibilities that sex offers with William, the good Christian, who thinks it is indecent to look at a woman's sex. Robert is a virile young man. He is so manly. A heat erupts from inside her body. She feels it in her earlobes, in the thin perspiration in the creases of her body, in her armpits.

"What if I'm old. I'm past menopause? Will not you then look for young girls? Will not you slide through the dark doors of brothels? If you are to be my man, you have to sacrifice your life. It'll be mine. I'll not be able to put up with a slight transgression. Don't play this gamble, baby."

Anja cries. Never has she felt such love in her heart? She feels she is not challenging her kid brother, but a man who has proposed her. She runs away, climbs up the stairs, kicks the door, and slumps herself onto her bed. She's whimpering, trying hard to swallow her sobs.

Raul gets the import of the moment. 'I could make this promise when I was 12,' he thinks. He feels happy. He is not an edgy guy. He can wait for the hurricane to calm. He goes to his room, puts on a jeans and the bush shirt. His sister's pubic hair is in his pocket. He walks along the streets of the small town. Everything is nice. The autumn air, the sound of birds in their nests, the dim lights, passing cars, the trees, the moon is rising. The night is tender. Tonight he has a woman to love. Tonight he is the happiest creature on God's material earth.