The Walk

Poem Info
121 words
4.67
2.5k
0
Share this Poem

Font Size

Default Font Size

Font Spacing

Default Font Spacing

Font Face

Default Font Face

Reading Theme

Default Theme (White)
You need to Log In or Sign Up to have your customization saved in your Literotica profile.
PUBLIC BETA

Note: You can change font size, font face, and turn on dark mode by clicking the "A" icon tab in the Story Info Box.

You can temporarily switch back to a Classic Literotica® experience during our ongoing public Beta testing. Please consider leaving feedback on issues you experience or suggest improvements.

Click here
demure101
demure101
212 Followers

The narrow path
drifts off into the wood
and then gets lost. The trees
close in till grassy verges
overgrow the pale
white sand. Nothing remains
but just a track that
tentatively
rambles on. Some stretches
are quite smooth, quite soft
to go. All sounds are drowned
in a thick bed of moss
but before long
it leads on different soil,
a stumbly path of stone,
a muddy pool or marshy,
soggy, with a pale white shroud
of tempting little flowers
and you find it has
no purpose, not a goal
in mind but turns away
and just escapes from view -
and when at last you think
you'll reach the end
it gives a sudden twist
and rattles you.

demure101
demure101
212 Followers
Please rate this poem
The author would appreciate your feedback.
  • COMMENTS
Anonymous
Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ
Post as:
Anonymous
4 Comments
twelveoonetwelveooneabout 11 years ago
seriously

either R.Frost, or 1201 said it better, wanderlost

DawnJDawnJabout 11 years ago
A sense of adventure

That's what's needed, and a willingness to go wherever the new path leads. And a willingness to let go of preconceived notions about the journey's end! Good one!

AngelineAngelineabout 11 years ago
This is very well done

the poem meanders like a walk and it's very tactile with all the sense-grabbing description. I like the somewhat surprising ending but feel that it's not enough: what exactly is the twist that rattles the narrator at the end? It's sort of a tease not to tell, but maybe you wanted to leave it vague. I think you can do that but still add something more, some hint or even just a shocking image that gives the end of your poem the punch it deserves.

SweetOblivionSweetOblivionabout 11 years ago
Perhaps that's what comes of taking the path less travelled

I do hope it made all the difference. S.O.