Mister Tumble's Christmas

Chloe fidgeted one more time. So far, so good. Courtney was doing much better than she thought she would with the pressing throng of children, the noise and the strange smells of close to one hundred adults. But she was ever vigilant. Even at events for special needs children such as these they were always out of place because Courtney did not fit the mould.

Her daughter was not the dull, but adorable, loving and pliable child that most people associated with disabled children. Courtney was considered trouble, loud, incorrigible and disrespectful in a society that valued the pretense of good manners more than it valued its children. Chloe shook her head, 'stop borrowing trouble,' she chided herself as she watched her daughter wait patiently in the queue for once. She smiled as she noted her shifting from foot to foot. Well, as patiently as her high functioning autism allowed anyway.

But this was worth it. Mister Tumble would be here. And he was Courtney's favourite Cbeebies character. Chloe's secret crush too if she would admit it. She knew how pathetic that made her when the only man she had been attracted to in almost three years was a balding, middle aged actor with a paunch around the middle who had made a man for himself by portraying a clown on children's television. But when your whole life is your child, twenty-four seven, three hundred and sixty five days a year...for life. Well, you spend a lot of time watching children's television.

"Isn't he just yummy?" Chloe turned at the sound of the vaguely familiar voice behind her. It was Lizzie, another single mother that she had met through the centre for special needs children and their families that was hosting this Christmas party. They had both attended the parent support group for autism but like most of the other parents in that group Lizzie's son was more severe on the Autistic Spectrum. He was the typical quiet, withdrawn, hand flapper that society had almost 'accepted' as different.

But Chloe and Courtney were different even from these people who were different. And that isolated them. They had not even been to the centre in months. But when they received the invite with the big picture on the front of Justin Fletcher, aka Mister Tumble, nothing would do Courtney but come to the party. She had begged and pleaded for days, promising to be good, something Chloe knew was actually beyond her daughter's capabilities. But she could not deny her something that meant so much. Besides when would she ever get the chance to lust after the man in person?

She reminded herself that he was just an actor playing a role. He probably could not stand children, period. Let alone one like Courtney. Despite what was said on the Internet the man was probably gay anyway. She nodded her head at the thought. Lizzie took that nod as an affirmation of her comment and launched into an animated and shrill monologue extolling the man they had all come to see.

The sound of her voice was getting on Chloe's nerves, what must it be doing to Courtney? Her daughter was especially sensitive to sounds and this room sounded like a bee hive even to her ears and they were no where near as attune to loud noises as Courtney. She looked over to where the children had been herded into a long queue by the staff. They were waiting to see Santa, just like every year. But this year, he had brought a special elf...Mister Tumble.

Chloe saw that Courtney was beginning to rock side to side where she stood. It was a bad sign when she began to display such classic signs of her autism. Chloe's vision blurred with tears as she realised that a meltdown was just moments away. What did she do? This meant so much for her daughter. But the stress was clearly more than she cold manage. The parents had been forced to the side, too many people, health and safety the staff had said despite her protests. So she had not even been there to coach Courtney through the rising stress. And now it was probably too late.

Disobeying the rules just as blatantly as her daughter would, Chloe excused herself and went to stand beside her child. She bent down and held up four fingers. It was a system that they had developed. A scale of one to five that allowed her daughter to communicate her distress without words. Courtney just nodded her head and Chloe felt the tears threaten to spill over.

Then just as it always seemed to...things got worse. The centre director came over, "Excuse me, Missus Ojawu, perhaps I did not make myself clear. Parents are NOT allowed in the queue with their children."

Chloe saw the beginning of the end of their world looming before her. Whatever made her think that they could do this. That they could actually attend the Christmas party without a meltdown. She was out of options. If she left her child's side then Courtney would proceed to a five...meltdown, volcanic eruption, to these people a temper tantrum but it wasn't. It was not a child manipulating them to get her way, it was a panic attack. And when her daughter had one the whole fucking world knew it.

She nodded and bent down next to her daughter, "Sweetie, you know Mummy said that if you had a meltdown we would have to leave, right?" The soft ringlets of dark curls bounced on her child's head as she reached out and grabbed her hand. That alone told her everything she needed to know about her child's distress level, Courtney never voluntarily held her hand, hugged or touched her mother in any way. It was one of the most heart breaking things for Chloe, not even having the comfort of a hug after a bad meltdown.

"Don't leave me, Mummy," her child pleaded. It broke Chloe's heart and set her resolve.

"I am sorry, Miss Jacobs, but you of all people should realise the stresses of this situation on the children. The noise, the lights, so many people. My daughter needs me right now," she tried reasoning with the woman.

But she knew even before she began that it was useless. This woman was always about the rules. Making the children follow her rules, all rules, whether they made any sense or not. How someone like her ended up as the director of a centre for special needs children said a hell of a lot about how this society treated its children, and its disabled.

The older woman crossed her arms, "The other children are managing. We cannot make an exception for one child."

Chloe looked up. There were just a couple of children in front of them now. They were so close. So fucking close to giving her daughter a taste of success. If they could just hold out five more minutes, they could see Santa, Courtney had her letter for him. Of course, she would not talk to him and definitely not sit on his lap. But if she could just give him her letter and meet Mister Tumble.

She plastered a reassuring smile on her face and crouched down beside her child, "Courtney, Mummy will be right over there. It is just a few more minutes. Less than a Minnie Bowtique." Despite years of trying, her daughter could not understand the ethereal concept of time so five minutes could have been an hour or a day to her. But she understood how long her favourite television shows lasted so they had worked out this coded system...A Minnie Mouse Bowtique less about ten minutes, Phineas and Ferb was fifteen and Avengers was half an hour. Chloe looked pleadingly at her daughter and prayed to a god that she no longer even believed in that they could make it through this.

"NO," her child screeched that ear splitting cry that had been her first warning sign that something was not 'normal' with her baby. "Don't leave me, mummy. Don't leave me," she clutched tightly at Chloe's arm as Miss Jacobs stared sternly.

"You need to take that child out of here now," the woman pronounced with finality as Chloe's world imploded.

"Excuse me, are you Princess Mirabella?" came the calm and quiet voice from just behind them. Chloe watched Courtney's eyes light up. Even before she turned she knew who it was. She knew that voice. It had come at her thousands, it seemed like millions of times, since Courtney was a baby. It was him. Mister Tumble. Justin Fletcher to be exact.

Courtney still clutched her mother's arm tightly but the screaming stopped. She looked at the man, her hero with those big brown eyes in her soft almost angelic mocha face. And Chloe wanted to cry. Her daughter shook her head. Those ringlets softly framing her face.

"Are you sure?" he asked with a smile. Courtney nodded this time. "Because Santa has been waiting all this time for a special princess and I would have sworn it was you." He looked up at Chloe then with that smile...and she fell in love.

Not just the crush that it had been, but genuine love borne of gratitude. How had he known? Okay so most little girls wanted to be princesses but it was Courtney's fixation. She even had the tiara that was her daughter's pride and joy in her bag.

Courtney did not even need to say it, Chloe reached into it and pushed past the emergency medicine for her seizures, the wee pants for accidents, her favourite chocolate and a three or four stress toys that she should have thought about earlier. But finally she found it and passed it to her little girl. She beamed as she placed it upon her head, "I am a Princess, but my name is Courtney not Maribel..." she stumbled over the word a bit.

"Mirabella," Chloe finished for her.

"Right, Mirabella," she smiled up at him.

"I knew it. I just knew it," he jumped up and down and turned around. "Santa has been waiting all morning for you, Princess Courtney." He held out his hand and she released her mother's arm long enough to take it. They danced around in a circle for a moment then, Justin bent back down. "Courtney, Santa, just finished with that little boy and he needs me to take the next one up and introduce him. But I promise as soon as I do, I will be back for you. If Santa has waited all morning for you, I know you can wait that long for him," he beamed.

Courtney grabbed for her mother's arm once more. He turned towards Miss Jacobs, "It will be just a couple of minutes. I don't see the harm in one parent staying with one child for that long, do you?"

The woman stared at him for a long moment, but finally she nodded. "Just this once," she pronounced as she turned and left without saying a word directly to Chloe or Courtney. 'Strike another resource from our limited list of help,' Chloe thought as she watched the woman's back disappearing into the crowd.

She stared up into the man's smiling face. It was familiar but strangely disconcerting. "Thank you."

He shrugged as he smiled at her daughter, "I will be right back. I promise, Princess." And then he too was gone. Leaving them standing alone.

"Humph, always showing off," she heard Lizzie whisper loudly behind them. "Thinking there is something special about you and your child."

Chloe broke, she had nothing left to loose anyway, she figured. "There is. We are special," she smiled at the shocked look on the woman's face. Chloe had learned early on the bullies, and there were plenty of adult ones in this world, never expected you to stand up to them. But she did. And she taught her daughter to as well.

"We are all special in our unique ways," Courtney finished for her mother with a smile. "You and Sam are special too. Even 'normal' people are special if they just allow themselves to be."

"And that young lady is why Santa has been waiting all morning for his special and wise Princess Courtney," came that familiar voice behind them. He bowed at the waist and held out his hand for her daughter.

Courtney giggled but took Justin's hand. "I'll be all right now, Mummy. Mister Tumble is going to introduce me to Santa." She turned to him with a smile, "Did he bring his reindeer? What do they eat? Mummy brought carrots in our bag. I made her buy the big bag just in case. And we made our famous Rocky Road Brownies for you and Santa. We brought a platter of them for everyone else too. But we cannot eat until after we see Santa. Miss Jacobs said so. She sets all the rules here and Mummy says we have to do our best to obey them...even when they are not fair."

Her daughter rambled loudly and quickly as they disappeared into the darkened sensory room that had been the main attraction of this centre. Chloe could almost see Lizzie rushing off as soon as her son was done with Santa to find Miss Jacobs and share this latest bit of gossip. But she did not care. He had saved the day. Courtney had met Mister Tumble and gotten to see Santa, whatever happened now did not matter. This day was a success...all thanks to him.

And it only got better from there. Santa gave Courtney the most popular doll of the season, the one from her favourite movie. The one that despite all her efforts Chloe had not been able to find in any store. The one that was going for close to one-hundred pounds on-line because everyone knew how hard it was to get their hands on.

The one that Chloe had cried because she could not afford to give her daughter...and she knew just knew that without it under the tree the whole day would be ruined by a meltdown because Santa had forgotten that one thing. Because to Courtney, Santa, Mummy and Mister Tumble could do anything. As she watched him laugh and play with her daughter and other children, Chloe actually began to believe that Mister Tumble just might be able to.

"Excuse me," said the young female voice from behind her. Chloe turned to see the intern that was just one of the half dozen members of Justin Fletcher's entourage. "Mister Fletcher asked me to get your details. He would like to have Courtney on the show sometime. If you are agreeable."

Chloe smiled, "I am not sure that she can manage such an exciting event but it was kind of you and him to ask," she tried to explain.

"No, Mister Fletcher understands fully. But he wants to educate people that there are many faces to challenges these children face. If you will just give me your details, I am sure he will contact you personally in the New Year to discuss it. Please?" she finished as she held out a clip board and pen.

Chloe shook her but smiled as she wrote down their names, her email address and even her mobile number. It was a great idea, one that had been her personal mission for longer than she could remember. But she wondered if even Mister Tumble was up to changing the prejudices of society.

***

They did it. They had made it to the very end. And as they stood with all the others in the car park waving as Mister Tumble practically fell into Santa's sleigh, Courtney had suddenly jerked her bag away from her. She had run after them before Chloe could stop her. A thousand disasters had flashed through her motherly imagination. 'Little girl trampled by Santa's reindeer,' read the headline in her mind. Instead Justin had simply smiled and thanked Courtney as she drew the two kilogram gram of carrots that had been weighing Chloe down for hours...and the small tin of brownies from her bag.

It was last now. Courtney was never easy to get to bed. Bubble bath, shaving foam on the tile wall for her to play with...one of her sensory things she told her Mummy. Her favourite television shows and then a book before bed. Even then there was medicine to be taken. Wee pants that Chloe had to beg and cajole her daughter into wearing. At least one glass of water. And of course her music box had to be wound up and play...two or three times sometimes. The whole routine took at least an hour often more.

By the time that she collapsed into her own bed, Chloe was so exhausted that she rarely had time for sexy fantasies or her special big girl toys under her pillow. Even though she knew that masturbating relieved her own stress and helped her to sleep better, it was another thing that just fell by the wayside. Sort of like her career and her marriage.

But Courtney was worth it. Chloe would do whatever it took to give her daughter the absolute best shot at a life. Chloe resisted using the word 'normal.' One of the lessons that her daughter's autism had taught her was that everyone had their own challenges...'normal' was an illusion. One that they could not afford. Functional...that was it. And Courtney was so high functioning that with love, care and patience, she had a very good chance at that.

No matter the cost to herself, Chloe thought as she rummaged in the kitchen cabinet for a wine glass. Even though it was almost two in the morning, Courtney had been even more difficult to get down tonight after such an exciting day, this night Chloe was going to make time for her. She had already used a touch of her daughter's beloved bubble bath. Now a glass of wine to relax her and take the edge off the stress that was surging through her whole body.

She smiled secretively as his face played upon the big screen in her mind. Who knew maybe she would even stay awake long enough to put her rabbit to use this night? He had certainly given her more than enough fodder for her fertile imagination. Maybe it was pathetic that she was in love...and lust...with a children's television actor. Or maybe everything that they had been through during the past few years had taught Chloe to appreciate the good guys. Maybe she had outgrown the childish attraction to bad boys like Courtney's dad? She preferred to see it that way anyhow.

She poured a large glass of red wine and retired to her bedroom. She took a long sip of the liquid as it scorched her dry throat. As she sat the glass down on the coaster on her night stand, she noticed that her mobile phone screen was lit up. She picked it up and keyed in the code to activate it. There was a single message.

'The brownies were great. Thank you.' She did not recognise the number, but since she had doubted that even Santa had her mobile number, the message could have only come from him. She knew it was too late to reply. But just the thoughtfulness and knowledge that somewhere out there someone understood her burdens was enough to bring tears to her eyes.

And do funny things to her libido as she climbed into her bed and reached for her rabbit. His smile danced and tumbled upon the closed lids of her eyes as the vibrator buzzed against her clitoris and the pearls spun and throbbed inside her tight cunt. It did not take her long to come. Come hard to her favourite fantasy. Her dream lover...Mister Tumble.