A Correspondence with Sharon Ch. 17byrivertown_rat©
Part 17: Sharon takes on Tommy and Scott.
This is the continuation of an email correspondence I had with a woman named Sharon Alderson. If you have not read the previous parts I suggest you go back and read from the beginning to get the full background. This conversation includes elements of wife swapping/sharing and group sex. If you don't approve of these behaviors and you still read on anyway then you are an idiot and I take great delight in knowing I've made you disgusted. Please leave me an anonymous note and let me know how well I've done.
Mar 03/24/09 6:18 PM
Wow! Thanks for the long email. That was the highlight of my day, believe me. I have been kind of in the dumps lately, but don't worry about me, I'm nothing if not resilient.
It looks like Joe is really trying to see how far he can push you. I think that he was emboldened by your conversations and probably feels like he now has your permission to do pretty much whatever he wants. I'm glad that you are talking about this stuff, but you need to keep doing it on a regular basis so that you can tell him if he goes too far, even if it's after the fact. I guess as long as Joe and "the boys" (they are still teens after all) keep in mind that this is only allowed when you are "in the mood", you should be OK.
Frankly I didn't even know how deep your submissive tendencies went. I didn't realize how far you were willing to go or how much you enjoyed being humiliated. Once again, you surprise me, Sharon.
I predicted a while ago that they would want some public nudity, or at least the threat of it, like keeping the drapes open and driving Tommy home. So far the possibility that the "wrong" person could see you has been minimized (cars driving in the alley probably go by too fast to see anything and driving naked at night is relatively safe), but I promise you, they will want to push it. It might be a good idea that the next time you talk to Joe you point out that this kind of thing could cause you career problems if not handled carefully. I'm sure you know what will happen if some parent sees you naked in public and reports you.
Now, with that out of the way, I have to ask: what was it like driving Tommy home naked? Did he give you a final grope when you dropped him off? Were you tempted not to wear the coat home?
Can't wait to hear about Sunday. Must have been fun.
Mar 03/24/09 5:00 PM
Nearly all of the e-mail I just sent was written yesterday and before I read your last e-mail. The only thing I just added was what happened after Joe brought Tommy over.
It looks to me that your observations are right on.
As for whether I can do both is still up in the air. Right now I'm handling it.
Mar 03/24/09 6:20 PM
Yes, I was right again. Fat lot of good it did you since it was after the fact. Again.
Mar 03/24/09 10:23 PM
Your email about Saturday left me with a lot to think about, and now that I've given it some additional consideration I have a few more observations.
I believe you are correct in your assertion that Joe orchestrated the entire evening, either directly or by his coaching of Tommy beforehand. I believe that most of the time he spent at the Center was talking to Tommy. It's likely that he spent a considerable amount of time explaining how submission and humiliation work and the difference between that and plain old abuse. It was Joe that suggested the spanking, for example. Probably when you were getting him that second drink. I also think that Joe either suggested that you drive naked all the way over to Tommy's house. It is possible that Tommy thought of it, but I'm sure he cleared it with Joe first. I'm more sure that it was Joe's idea to make you wait in the car.
I believe that as far as the boys are concerned, Joe is going to be the driver. He will be coaching them and giving them new ideas for humiliating you. The reason is simple: he has had much more time as an adult to think about these things. Like me he probably read the Penthouse letters before the Internet, and porn was probably one of the first things he searched for when he got a connection at home. So he's had a lot more time to fantasize about these things, especially your involvement. Most of your former students probably have not gotten past the fantasy of seeing you naked. That's good for me because I understand Joe much better than your students.
So in that vein I'd like to talk about a few things that you and Joe have different ideas about. The first one is the word 'anything', as in "when I'm in a submissive mood I'll do anything". To Joe this literally means anything that he can think of that he feels is not too risky, with no restrictions of any kind. It is absolute. To you it means "anything within reason", however only you know what is reasonable. For example, you have already said no pictures or video, no way no how. To Joe this is in conflict with his idea of "anything". Yes he knows that you have said no to pictures, but now he is wondering if "anything" eventually trumps that. So there's a mixed message there that you will eventually have to resolve. It would probably be best if you said "almost anything" or "nearly anything" to leave yourself some wiggle room to reject things like pictures or body piercings, unless you really meant to throw all rules and restrictions out the window.
So, where is Joe going to push things from here? Well, if I had to guess here are some things that are in store.
* Men love the female form, so expect more requests to wear lingerie for them. You may also want to brush up on your strip tease and lap dancing.
* Men like Joe and I like to show our wife off, so expect more public nudity and/or flashing. This is a dangerous area for you, so keep giving him feedback so that he knows when he's starting to go too far. Flashing truckers on the highway seems to be a favorite and it's pretty safe, especially if it's not done too close to home. Going through a drive-thru with you naked is also popular. Again, don't do this too close to home.
* Men like to watch women masturbate. I don't know why, but it's incredibly erotic. For most women it's also quite humiliating to put on such an intimate show, so expect this "order" to come up eventually. Probably sooner than later.
* He won't give up on the picture/video thing, but we've already discussed this at length.
* I think you are right that Joe's brother is just a matter of time. But even more humiliating for you and a bigger turn-on for Joe would be stranger sex. Not a stranger to Joe, but to you. It would probably be someone he knows at the Center, like a loyal customer that he has become friends with, but you've never met. This would be down the line sometime after the brother and probably after the big GB. This is why he asked if you'd fuck anybody he brought home.
* Younger students would be a big turn-on as well. You have a class graduating every year, so this would give Joe the opportunity to pick someone out who is in your class right now and bring him over to fuck you right after he graduates. I can even see him telling you about his pick a few weeks before graduation so that you have to look at him every day in class knowing he would be fucking you soon. That would be really diabolical, but if I can think of it, so can Joe. So, who do you think he'll pick? Maybe more than one?
* I'm 100% sure that he'd like to see you with another woman. Of course, he'd have to find another woman, and that's much more difficult than finding a man. I don't think you like this idea, but to Joe it fits the "anything" clause. Don't count on the idea that he won't be able to find a willing woman who'd like to dominate you. Joe is very resourceful and if he wants something bad enough, he'll find a way. He has so far.
* A lot of men with a submissive wife like to bring them to strip clubs. Yes, the ones with the female strippers. Just being there is humiliating enough, but they also make them wear very revealing clothes and flash the other men there. They also like to buy them lap dances from the strippers.
* Shaving the pubes. Women are smooth and soft just about everywhere except there, so many men prefer to have their women shave there. I think that Joe will eventually ask you to shave and keep it that way, unless he's one of the few that like hairy pussies. Another reason they want their woman to shave: in their minds only cock hungry sluts shave their pubic hair.
* Bondage. Nothing too serious, I think, but getting tied up is probably in your future. This is the ultimate submission.
Now this isn't a complete list by any chance, but I'll add to it over time as things occur to me. It's also unlikely that all of these things will happen, however I believe that most of them will if you keep your pledge to let go as much as possible. But mainly I put this list together to give you a little more insight into the thought processes of the male mind on sexual domination and humiliation.
Mar 03/25/09 5:00 PM
The email you sent yesterday gave me more to think about than usual. Thank you for that.
I have been going back over it and I realized that I missed a couple things that I wanted to comment on. I know your time to read and compose email is limited, so I'll try to be concise, however I do have a lot I want to say.
You said "I believe that is (his belief in your limited sexual experience) one of the major reasons this is all so exciting for him." I could not agree more. The idea that he is watching you have these new sexual experiences at his urging is a very erotic. For this reason I think it would be best if you continued to keep him in the dark about your past sexual experiences. Revealing these to him would not ruin all things for him, but it would dampen his enjoyment.
In my previous email I tried to give you a sense of how men think about submissiveness, domination, and humiliation. I'm going to continue that theme now and talk about submission. The first thing to realize is that this is a game that you are playing with Joe and the boys, in the sense that you turn it on and off. In this game you play the role of the submissive and they play the dominant. Joe seems to understand this already given the way he acted on Saturday night when Tommy was there. He played the dominant role as an example for Tommy.
While your desires to be submissive are a natural part of your personality, the way you express them are a conscious effort on your part. If you want to play the role to maximum effect it's important for you to understand what Joe and the boys, but Joe mainly, expects. Please keep in mind that this is not me telling you how to play your role, rather this is a man's point of view on how the role should be played.
To me you seem to be a strong, assertive woman who is not afraid to be in charge. Now obviously you need to curb that impulse to be in charge when you are being submissive, and I think you are doing that successfully. However you also need to be careful with your assertiveness and strong will. For example, when Joe or the boys asks you something you probably look them straight in the eye when you answer. If so it's just habit, but to play a submissive you should really look down instead. That's a clear signal that you are submitting your own will to them. Another good signal is in how you answer. For example, when Joe told Tommy "She'll take care of it, won't you honey?" and you answered "I guess", that was a weak answer. Being submissive does not mean being weak, you can still keep your assertiveness, just use it to help you play the role. You could have said "Yes, sir." That's a strong answer that shows your submission in an assertive way, if that makes sense.
Doms expect their subs to generally be silent unless they are asked to speak. I know this goes against your nature, but it is important for the role. When the dom asks you your opinion on something he is not really interested in what you want. He wants you to reinforce his wants and desires. For example, if your dom asks you what you want to do, you should say something like "I want to be your cock slut and please you with my body", or "I want you to use me for your pleasure." Try to avoid weak responses like "Whatever you want is OK with me." Remember they don't want to beat that strong assertiveness out of you, it's one of the things that attracts them to you. They want to tame it and bend it to their will, or at least pretend to.
The choice of vocabulary is important to. Subs are expected to use the coarser names for things, like "tits" instead of "breasts" or "boobs"; "pussy", "cunt", and "snatch" instead of "vagina" or "down there"; "cock", "dick", or even "fuck stick" instead of "penis" or "your thing". Asking to be "fucked" or "pounded" is better than asking to be "screwed". Referring to yourself as a "slut" is always a turn on if you can work it into the conversation. For example, if they ask you if you are ready to be fucked you could reply, "Your slut is always ready for your cock." Throwing in a "dirty" or "filthy" occasionally will make the doms happy as well, as in "I love being your dirty cum slut."
A good sub slut will always offer to clean off their doms cock with their mouth after they have fucked you. Men don't like it when their cocks are all slimy, and they especially don't like to put their clothes on that way. This is one thing that most men wish their women would do for them, but that few women will.
When a dom asks his sub to do something and the sub is not sure they can do it, it's alright to express that. For example, "I don't know if I can do that, sir." This gives the dom a chance to force the reluctant sub to do it and thereby gives them both pleasure. If this happens too often, though, it can annoy both and lead to a less pleasurable experience. It is useful for the doms and the sub to have some prearranged signal or phrasing that the sub can use to absolutely refuse something that is too far beyond their comfort zone. This prevents confusion with the previous case where the sub was just reluctant. Something that won't ruin the mood, but makes the point, like "That's not a good idea, sir." Whatever is chosen all the doms should know and honor it. They may question the sub's reasoning, but ultimately they must not press the issue. Consistency from the sub is important as well, she should not use it unless she is absolutely serious in her refusal.
Attitude is important; if you adopt the right attitude then everything else will follow. I remember a story I read about a guy who shared his girlfriend with his male friends. On one such occasion the guy asked her if it bothered her to have sex with her boyfriends friends, and she responded, "It's only tits and stuff; that's what it's there for." That's the kind of thing that a sub slut who has the right attitude would say.
That's all for now. Feel free as always to ask questions or to expand on anything that I've discussed.
Looking forward to your account of your time with Tommy and Scott on Sunday.
Mar 03/25/09 9:05 PM
I don't have the time to say much now but did want to tell you that your insights into the male way of thinking are invaluable. That is an area where my knowledge is very limited and it really helps when you explain the male thought process.
You have given me a lot to think about.
I should be off tomorrow and plan on writing you sometime in the morning. If I don't get company.
Mar 03/25/09 9:32 PM
I am glad that I can be helpful. I am doing the best that I can under the circumstances, but events are moving faster than you can write me about them, apparently. That means my observations must necessarily be more general and less timely than they otherwise would be.
Unless Tommy and/or Scott are working tomorrow one or both of them will show up tomorrow since they know what days you have off. If you get interrupted in the middle of an email, just save the draft and come back to it later. I can't check my email until I get home from work anyway.
On this subject, I've been concerned for some time now that keeping me up to date on your personal life has become a chore for you. Please be honest with me and tell me if our conversations now provide too little value for the effort you must put in. While that would be quite disappointing to me if it were true, I would rather know than continue to be a burden or a mere obligation to you.
Mar 03/26/09 8:10 AM
You are wrong about our e-mailing exchange being a chore but you were right in the first paragraph when you said things were moving faster then my ability to keep you informed.
I have found that not only are your insights helpful but even writing you of my activities seems to give me a perspective on what is happening that I other wise wouldn't have. By no means is writing you a chore or something I feel I must do.
There are things I can't ask or tell to anyone else but you. Sure I talk with Joe but how can I talk with Joe about Joe. I've said before that you and Joe seem to think a lot alike. Your insights into the workings of the male mind are most invaluable. Generally, when you say Joe is probably thinking something, he usually is. Even the things you told me that the young men are thinking has been very accurate.
No, writing you is not a chore. I look forward to it. Time is the only enemy and I spoke with Joe about that last night. You see Paul, writing you isn't the only thing that has suffered these last few weeks. I took walks everyday and haven't done that for weeks now. I went to the library at least twice a week and haven't been there in a month. Those are just two examples. many other little things I have been delaying or not doing at all. all of my time recently has been either doing something or talking about it with Joe. if you remember, I told you that I really enjoyed going shopping with Jeanne and Diane because I was feeling overwhelmed by the situation.
Sitting down and writing you about the situation is one of the few breaks I get and something I want to do. If you are sensing that it is a chore for me, you have misinterpreted my frustration over not being able to write more often.
You are and will remain my only source for a third person perspective.
Mar 03/26/09 12:14 PM
Sunday started as a normal day but I knew it wouldn't end that way. Joe spoke of doing something "wild and crazy" but wouldn't elaborate. He claimed that by telling me, it would ruin the spontaneity of the situation. I was sure it would involve Tommy and maybe even Scott. Joe did tell me that we were going to dinner and asked me to wear a dress. That was no help. A woman needs to know what kind of dress. I got a hint when Joe said, "Wear something you would wear to school."
That told me it involved Tommy and I probably wouldn't have it on long. I knew that Tommy gets turned on seeing me dressed as I would for school and doing something with me. He would rather see me in my teacher clothes then a sexy night gown.
Joe was planning on wearing casual clothes so I guessed we were not going anywhere fancy for dinner. Since I knew I was dressing for Tommy, I went through my closet to find a suit and blouse combination I had worn when he was a student. I heard Joe on the phone while I was dressing but not enough to determine who he was talking to or who he was talking with.
After dressing, I went downstairs and was met by Joe. He handed me a glass of wine that I didn't really want but took anyway. I figured I would probably need it. He told me we would be leaving as soon as our guests arrived. Within ten minutes, Tommy and Scott were at our back door. I started to let them in but Joe told me not to bother because we were leaving. We walked out into the garage and I started to get into the front seat of Joe's car. He stopped me and said, "You three will be riding in the back."