A New Beginning

Just when I think that I’m settled into comfort
Something or someone comes along to send me spiraling once again
Confusion reigns eternal in moments like this
When I am reminded once again of my slave heart

What makes it more tempting, like beckoning waves
Is that I have known him for countless moments rolled into years gone by
But now … now I see him in this new shading of light
And it is as if I have never seen him before

How can this be … how can my belly suddenly lurch into a thousand motions
Whenever I let my mind wander to him uncontrollably
I cannot stop these tumulus emotions that erupt from deep within
Oh, to be held in his arms and to be seen as a girl he could love

Why now? Why does he affect me so? What am I to do?
I crave to be branded into his heart like he did to mine so long ago
My soul cries out to him piteously even as my mind screams in protest
Do I dare reach out to him in chance of being rejected by my friend?

I dare not speak the hope he has breathed into me with his smile
Afraid that speaking it aloud will only break the spell he has over me
Hanging by a mere thread on the moments that he casts my way
Desperate for one more word sent in my direction

Ashamed should I be of this helpless solitude that is self-placed
In hopes of being available to his every beck and call
I do not think he even knows of my desperate desire to please him
Of the wild beating of my heart when he looks in my direction

But yet it burns deep within me
Hand in hand with the hope that resurges through my veins
Tentatively reaching out with trembling fingers
To the new beginning he has presented to my heart