A Review on a Marital Aid

This is for all you married men out there, no not you honeymooners but you men who have been married awhile. You're horny but the wife's not in the mood or she just doesn't feel like it. You have a few choices here: I) you can whine and beg until she just gives in to shut you up, you know this will cost you later i.e. a trip to your mother in laws or worse. 2) Get mad and storm out of the house to go look for some strange or god forbid, your ex. Now this might sound like a good idea at the time but it's guaranteed to come back to haunt you. 3) Grab a skin mag (or a good story by Bakeboss) and go lock yourself in the bathroom and masturbate.

I understand option number three may seem the least satisfying but not only is it the easiest it carries the least ramifications. Because most men start jacking off at an early age, a lot feel it is an immature act and usually by the time they are in sexual relationship they stop the act of self pleasure. The problems stem from a difference in sexual appetites that are often unnoticed at the start of a relationship due to the desire to appease the new partner. It is after a couple becomes comfortable together that these differences come out. This does not mean they love you less or that they were intentionally misleading you so there is no reason to feel hurt.

As long as we're not talking about replacing the wife with the palm of your hand, I can't see anything wrong with rubbing one out when you're wife is not in the mood. The problem is a lot of us men are, well what can I say but, lazy and some men find it's just easier to go jack off than try and get the little woman in the mood. If you do it too often you're are no longer abetting you sex life with self-love you beginning to substitute hand jive for sex.

Science will tell you, an orgasm is an orgasm; it doesn't matter if you get it from the wife, that hottie on the TV or even a high priced hooker, it is all just a biological function, and the end result is all the same. Now you and I as real live men and not lab experiments know that is pure bullshit. Yet in reality, we are just looking for stress relief and if the ends justify the means what is wrong with some masturbation.

As long as a proper lubrication is used to prevent chafing, masturbation is the only way you can have one hundred percent safe sex. Nobody ever got pregnant from beating off and you can't catch a STD from a one-man love fest. The urge for man to seek new partners to procreate is in our genes and for many men there is only the fear of what disease may be lurking under the skirt of that new conquest you might meet that keeps them true to their partner. These men need only to understand that with a little imagination and a well-lubed palm they can have any person that they desire. Furthermore they not only get to be with these people they can be with be with them in any sexual act they can dream up and with no consequences. Now is this cheating? I for one don't think so because I don't think you can cheat just in your imagination. As for what your partner might think about this I guess that will have to be saved for a later debate. As for me, I'm just saying, I wouldn't say who I was doing in my head and therefore what she didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

I realize this whole piece can be taken as just another that is insensitive to women but that is not what I'm trying to say. I also understand that women have needs every bit as much as their husbands and partners but I don't feel I have the knowledge or the right to discuss that at this juncture. What I would like to say is that I love my wife and I am not trying to demean her in any way by this paper. We have a strong marriage and a good relationship and still, or maybe because of it I have no qualms about going off to masturbate if I happen to be in the mood and she is not. This is not something we discuss or I announce, it is more like one of the many un-talked about secrets often kept in a marriage.

So, no, self-love is not the panacea for all of the sexual problems of the modern marriage but I feel that it can go a long way in easing many of the frustrations often found in the bedroom. I am only recommending this and if it offends you, don't do it. However I can say, what have you got to lose, and if you don't like it the only thing you've done is to make a Kleenex baby. Oh, and if my wife happens read this, it's all just a joke honey you know I wouldn't ever do anything like that.