Adventures of Hollywood Jim Ch. 50byhollywoodjim©
Authors Note-As this is the 50th chapter in our hero's adventures, I figured it should be someone special. Thanks for your comments and especially your patience with new chapters. Hollywood Jim's adventures are far from over, though and he has plenty more to come, Enjoy!
A recap; Arriving in Hollywood from Connecticut to work at East Coast Image, his best friend Chris' photography business, "Hollywood Jim" (the nickname Chris gave him that still makes him blush) has had some incredible luck meeting, photographing (and bedding) more than a few Tinsel Town lovelies as their business boomed and took them to film sets, nightclubs, and gala affairs around the country and overseas. So much so it attracted the attention of Artists Unlimited (aka AU), a top Hollywood talent agency with interests in film, TV and music who made them an attractive offer to merge their talents. But before a final decision could be made, Chris died in a car accident on New Years Eve. To Jim's surprise, Chris' final act of friendship was to leave the business to Jim. After much negotiating, East Coast Image merged with Artists Unlimited and Hollywood Jim's adventures have only continued.
The memo was sent company-wide, and secrecy was of the utmost.
Our "beloved leader", Artists Unlimited chief Chuck Tyler was celebrating a birthday and following his return from company meetings in New York, he was welcomed back with a massive party at the home offices. And massive it was. He looked surprised at his wife's ability to keep this secret.
The day after, I received an email from her inviting me to an extended weekend bash at his beach house, in Hawaii. This was another place I hadn't been to in a long time and the last time was when I met up with Jessica and Ashlee Simpson. And this was after the rendezvous I had with Kim Kardashian.
In other words, those islands held many great memories!
Chuck Tyler had made his fortune in studio recording software, then as the first manager of Tigress with Marty O'Brien before selling his interest in them to Marty. Since Chris' accident they'd laid low, I never heard if Marty would be implicated somehow and had no idea if their management was changing, or if they were still together for that matter. In all the time we'd worked with them I'd never gotten as close to them as Chris did so I really had no idea what their take on the whole new years' eve debacle was.
For now though, it was time to get my Hawaiian shirts out of the closet.
I was getting excited again about going there, it had been a long time and if the last bash of his I went to there was any indication, who knows what awaited me.
But first I had to get through a day that was getting worse the longer it went on. The California rains had started up unexpectedly as I was driving in, and the convertible top chose this moment to stop working as I sat in morning traffic, so unlike a Mercedes to have this kind of trouble. I pull in for my coffee and newspapers and find none are available and the guy behind the counter speaks not a word of English so my complaints were no good. I finally get to work and my ID badge isn't working so it took forever to get someone to let me into the garage and the building.
I think I'm entitled to be a grouch today.
Wet, grouchy and pretty pissed off I also get an elevator that barely crawls upward and stops at every floor.
This day gets better and better.
"Hold the elevator, please!" I heard a female voice calling as the doors began to close. I barely hit the button in time for her to get on with another woman.
"Oh, thank you so much!" she said as she caught her breath
I nodded as the doors closed and leaned against the elevators wall, slowly letting my anger and frustrations fade as it continued its creep upward. Although I wasn't trying to, I could hear the pair's conversation;
"I'm still not sure about this, Deb...I'm pretty happy with William Morris, and I've been with them forever. Why switch managers now?"
"Just hear them out, Jen. I've heard a lot of good things about Artists Unlimited. They're supposed to have an awesome photo guy here."
Now my ears perked up! I tried to turn my head so I could get a look at who was speaking without being too obvious. One had short blonde hair and was idly scrolling through a cellphone but the other had thick brunette hair that softly cascaded over her shoulders and wore a stylish khaki colored blazer over a white silk blouse and matching skirt that seemed to emphasize her legs.
The more I heard them speak the more I realized who it was.
Oh, my god!
My eyes were suddenly like saucers and my mind went into overdrive as to what I should or shouldn't say to this lady.
Was it who I thought it was?
Oh my god it was!
Jennifer Love Hewitt, yep, it was her alright!
What do I do?
What do I do?
Hollywood, what do I do?
Do I tell her I loved her movies? Her TV shows or just her body? Where were the gods of witty conversation when I really needed them the most? Not to mention the courage to actually try and say "hello" to her?
"Are you getting off?" I suddenly heard her say
"What?" I somehow croaked out
"The elevator." She said "You must be getting off the on the same floor as me."
"Oh, yes I-I m-must." I said "The same floor, right!" I said quickly, as if I was out of breath.
"Okay, see you later." She said with that classic smile of hers and a little wave as she and her assistant went down the hallway and I stood in the elevator lobby with other employees staring at me.
"Oh, man I better block that one from my memory." I said to myself
But I knew I couldn't, so I could at least smile a little
Perhaps this day would be good after all.
The office that Chuck had promised me was up and running. And I had to admit I loved it. He kept insisting I should have an assistant but for the amount of calls I got I really didn't feel it was necessary, for now at least.
As I got in and tried to towel off whatever rain was still on me, my phone was buzzing.
"Hey Jim," it was Jeff from upstairs "could you bring up those photo sheets from yesterday?"
"You got it."
I pulled a file of photos and headed up to Jeff's office. It was the usual hubbub of activity as I came in. He was trying to get as much work done before going to Chuck's party, he planned to use that as a starting point to his own vacation at the Australian Grand Prix in Melbourne and his desk was piled high with files and paperwork.
"Man did I pick a lousy day to be productive." He said as he looked through the file.
"Could be worse, at least you didn't drive a convertible with a faulty top today." I said "Like I did."
"When it rains, it pours." He mumbled, just before chuckling "Thanks, pal I'll call you later."
As I walked out of the office I could hear Chuck's boisterous laugh down the hall and could see he was walking with someone.
Oh my god, it's her!
I tried to look inconspicuous as I went towards the elevators.
My luck just gets better and better.
"Hey, Jimmy!" Chuck called "Get your tail down here, got someone for you to meet!"
Rats! I was so close to a clean getaway.
A dream and a nightmare just presented themselves to me.
What to do? Ah! Talk fast and play the "I've got a ton of work to do" card. That always works.
"Oh, Chuck I've got a ton of work to do and..."
My excuse was cut off at the pass, and not by Chuck.
"Oh come on, you can't be THAT busy!"
It was Jennifer who over ruled me with that voice and smile. She even seemed to be laughing as she said it. Maybe some of his sense of humor had rubbed off on her.
Now, there's a scary thought.
I was frozen in my tracks, she just had that power, I guess.
Well, so much for playing the "I've got a ton of work to do" card.
Numerous other employees were peering over their cubicles and around corners trying to get a glimpse of her as she came down the hall with Chuck by her side and I felt like I had tunnel vision as she approached.
"Jim, meet the newest member of the Artists Unlimited family." He said
"Hi, I'm Jennifer." She said as she extended an elegantly manicured hand.
"W-w-wow...hello." I somehow said "so good to meet you."
"Jim's our photo guy." Chuck continued "you'd be working with him on the project."
"What project is that?" I said
"New film that's in the works, we'll go over the details later." He said quickly
I couldn't believe I was standing next to her. She looked so gorgeous, like a rising corporate executive at one of those companies my Dad worked for.
"Chuck says you're the go-to guy here for photos." She said
I could barely come up with a response
"Oh! Uh, very flattering thing for him to say." I finally said
"Hey, if you can make me look good that's half the battle." Jennifer said with a giggle
"That won't be a problem." Chuck quickly said "Jen, let me show you to our film division." He said as he led her away.
I watched her walk away and still couldn't believe I'd talked to her, even for just a few moments. My face was still showing a smile of amazement, especially when she looked over her shoulder at me and gave me that million dollar smile of hers.
"Wow." Was all I could say to myself at that moment, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, hoping that I could regain my composure.
Looks like it worked.
She and Chuck had turned the corner and life went on.
The following day a small group of invited guests arrived at the airport for the flight to Hawaii on board the company jet. It was still a new feeling to be using private jets, but on the other hand, the seats sure were comfortable!
Once I got on board, I looked out the window and among the last few passengers boarding was a girl wearing a fleece jacket and sweatpants. Her brunette hair seemed to be tucked into a ponytail. I could hear her voice as she entered the plane and I leaned forward to see over the top of the seat in front of me, it was Jennifer.
"Oh, man..." I said to myself
She looked casually pretty as she made her way down the aisle and sat across from me. As she got comfortable she turned to her left, I quickly looked down but she saw me.
"Hey, Jim!" she said in a low tone with her megawatt smile
"Oh, hi, uh you're coming too, cool." I said trying to seem casual.
"Hey, I'm not turning down a trip to Hawaii." She said "I've been going there since I was a kid."
"Really, I've only been there once before."
Jennifer slid over to a closer seat as she spoke
"I first went there when I did 'Birds of Paradise' years ago I was like 14 or 15." She said "I always have good luck whenever I go there."
"Interesting, how so?"
"I don't know, I just have a lot good times here." She began "I got engaged there long ago, but that's another story."
I nodded, remembering how the event was remembered more for her being called fat.
Chuck was the last to board.
"Welcome aboard Air Tyler, flying non-stop to Aloha City, where the pineapples grow and the drinks will flow."
Jennifer and I looked at each other, she laughed when I rolled my eyes.
"Just the kind of thing you want to hear first thing in the morning." I said to her
"I should've brought my stewardess uniform." She said
"Oh, really?" I said with a raised eyebrow "Air Jen, huh?"
She nodded, still giggling.
"Oh, yeah...fly me." She said comically.
That's one round the world trip I'd love to make, I thought to myself.
Once we took off, Jennifer slid into the seat next to me and it was another nightmare coming true. I was so nervous being so close to her, she was so pretty and it was another one of those times when I have to tell myself that I'm really here with her and I'd better not do anything wrong.
I suddenly remembered a story I'd heard Michael Caine tell, that finally gave me the nerve to say something to her.
"You know, uh, I really get tongue-tied in moments like this." I said
"What do you mean?"
"Well...uh...have you ever had it happen when you suddenly realize where you are and who you're with?"
She looked intrigued.
"...and you wonder if it's all real?"
"Yes...yes I have." She said slowly, looking even more intrigued
"Well, that's what I'm feeling now. I'm just this geek from Connecticut, and now I'm on a private jet, going to Hawaii, and I'm talking to someone like you. It's just very strange."
Jennifer looked at me now
"I know exactly how you feel." She said as she nodded her head "I've had that happen so many times, I have to tell myself the same thing."
"Do you mind if I ask how it happened with you?"
"Oh my, gosh..." she thought "Oh! It was when I met Elizabeth at her house."
"Elizabeth Taylor, she had this brunch at her house like a year ago and I was invited, it was so incredible being there and talking to her." She explained "I wish I could've gotten to know her better. She reminded me of my Grandma."
"Man, the stories she could tell."
"What about you? When did it happen with you?" she asked, adding an inquisitive look for effect.
"Good question." I said, then thought for a while "Uh, would you believe I had to give Paris Hilton a ride in the trunk of my Honda so she could evade a bunch of paparazzi?" I said with a 'would you believe?' look on my face.
Jennifer thought for a moment
"Strangely enough, that sounds believable." She now said with a laugh "Really? That really happened to you?"
I sheepishly nodded
"Now, THAT is a story!"
"Yeah, well I guess the stranger the better." I said
The smile on her face was that classic one she could patent; we'd all seen it so many times.
Just then Chuck came by.
"Hey Jennifer, it's good to see you here." He said "You'll have to tell Jim about the film project."
"Sure, seems like as good a time as any."
"Great, I'll check back with you later...I gotta hit the head." He said as he headed for the bathroom in back.
"I guess subtle is his middle name." I said
Jennifer laughed in response.
"The project he was talking about is a film I'm doing called "The Driver."
"I'd be playing a getaway driver for hire, it's actually a backup project in case Law and Order falls through." She continued
"Ah, that's right I read about how you might be going there."
Jennifer crossed her fingers
"It would be so incredible if I got to be on that show." She said. I could sense how she really wanted the part. "I'd love the challenge."
"Sure, plus you get to be in New York all the time."
"Uh-huh, I've been a California girl for so long."
"You know, I remember a film from the 70's with that same title and story." I said
"Right, Ryan O'Neal was in it originally." She replied
"Oh! So you'd be in his part?"
"Awesome! I remember seeing that film long ago."
"Well, like I said, it's just a backup if SVU falls through. I can still do it later on. But if I had to choose, I'd take SVU."
"I would too, to be a part of that series, even if for a short time is something special."
Chuck returned now
"So, I heard you two talking. Sound like a good project?" he said
"Yeah, I know the movie. It's one of those 70's B-movies I used to see on the late show. I agree with her though that SVU should be a priority if it comes through."
"Ah, you sound more and more like an agent." He chuckled
"Oh! We can't have too many of those!" Jennifer laughed
Chuck went forward to his seat and was immediately in conversation with another passenger I couldn't see but who somehow seemed familiar.
It still seemed unreal I was talking to Jennifer but, yep, I was. She wanted to know all about my work, how I got started.
"Wow, you go everywhere." She said "Do you ever slow down?"
"I try to, I've been kinda lucky lately. Making the switch to AU slowed things down."
"Are you sure? Chuck seemed to imply they're like worldwide and all."
"OK, so...I'll be a world traveler." I said with a shrug "I can give my passport a workout."
Jennifer and I seemed to both pause in our thoughts
"I think I know what you feel." She said slowly as she looked at me with a slight smile.
Chuck returned and got Jennifer for an impromptu meeting up front. I took this as my chance to try and sleep the remainder of the flight. For a change, it worked.
When I awoke I could feel the plane slow down as it made its landing approach. Jennifer was next to me again, looking slightly nervous.
"Would you mind holding my hand? I get a little nervous on landing." She said
Like I'm gonna say no?
"Not at all." I said as we held hands
As soon as we felt the bump of the plane hitting the tarmac we both relaxed.
"I'm usually not a nervous flyer." She said as she began to gather her things
"Just a nervous lander?" I replied
"Yes, exactly!" she laughed
She was so pretty when she laughed, I guess if you can make someone laugh, that's half the battle of getting to know them. And it sometimes means you've made a connection with them. If anything, it builds your confidence.
Chuck had provided transport to his beachfront home and since the last time I was there he'd expanded the property, adding 2 small guest cabanas, naturally with ocean views. Being around his "estate" was very overwhelming for me as you can imagine. It was still so strange to think I was actually in an island paradise like this, and with a beauty like Jennifer along for the ride, I wonder if she ever felt the same as me? I settled in to my little cabana, it still had the comforts of home.
The three small cabana-type houses were built in a semi-circle that looked out onto the ocean with a large patch of manicured lawn in the middle.
The inside of the main house was a beach boy's palace, with high ceilings and aged wood throughout. But it still had the high-tech feel of a software tycoon. I walked around the property in my board shorts and t-shirt, with an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt for good measure. The ocean breeze was so gentle, the sun and surf intoxicating. Some of Chuck's friends had already arrived and the drinks were starting to flow, a barbecue was set for later on.
And the beach was calling my name. I longed to feel the sand on my feet and the warm ocean on my body.
It had been awhile since I was last here. I looked up the coastline, trying to see if the ultra-chic house I'd been in before was still there. The memories of that place would stay with me forever. I wondered if Kim was around, or maybe the Simpson girls? Ah, well, it didn't matter, I was here! Hollywood Jim was really here!
I looked out at the ocean and saw a beautiful sight. It seemed like someone was arising from the waves and slowly walking out. She ran her fingers through her black hair, slicking it down. Her classic string bikini was a brilliant shade of sky blue and she now emerged fully from the ocean and slowly walked up towards me.
It was Jennifer.
She saw me and with an elegant look on her face pulled the string on her top, letting it fall to the sand.
Oh my god, she was topless in front of me.
"I've waited for you Mr. Hollywood...waited so long..." she said as she walked towards me. Here tits were beautifully large and gorgeous, perfectly rounded, with quarter-size nipples. Whatever genetics she had been very kind to her. She embraced me and the ocean scent combined with the sunlight and her soft body made for something out of a dream.
So why was she holding a bacon cheeseburger instead of me?
Just then I felt something hit me in a place that I'd rather not have hit.
It was a football.
I held the ball and looked around. One of Chuck's party guests quickly ran up.
"Oh, sorry, man! You OK?" he asked as he grabbed the ball.
"Yeah, I must've dozed off." I said as I rubbed my eyes.