Against My Will

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When I dropped out of college to get married, everyone, relatives, friends, my mother, all told me I was making a terrible mistake. They were right. Unfortunately, when you're twenty years old, exercising your right to NOT take good advice is consistent with the stupidity of youth and a total lack of common sense.

Within nine months I was divorced, no job, botched education and living back home with my mother. It was like a bad dream...stuck in a small one horse town, a place I swore I would leave the day I became an adult. Suddenly I found myself confined with no apparent way out.

I would become extremely depressed when I thought about my high school days. Those were my golden days, the popularity I experienced, the self esteem I felt. My friends were absolutely sure I would be the one who would escape this boring rural community and be successful in my endeavors. How did I go from the "girl most likely" to a total failure?

My mother worried so much about me she finally swallowed her pride and confided with an old family friend, Mr Lewis, for advice. He was the sole owner of the only bank in the county, extremely rich and not known to be benevolent to failures.

Surprisingly, he actually created a position for me at his bank...a charitable act that even surprised my mother. She decided his offer of employment was so uncharacteristic of him, he surely must have had an ulterior motive. She was convinced he was going to expect something sexual from me.

Her fears never materialized. In fact, he was extremely paternal, and our relationship was more akin to a grandfather-granddaughter than employer and employee.

And because the old man liked me, I soon became the youngest person ever to be promoted to Head Cashier in the history of the bank. This was an extremely prestigious position for a woman in such a small rural community. He even paid me more than anyone else in the bank, more than employee's who had been with him for years and years.

I became comfortable...the best way to describe my life I guess...buying a small home and resigning myself to the fact I was never leaving the town where I was born. But, I also felt fortunate, thankful my life wasn't going to be a total failure. And the respect...the respect the community showed towards me and my position was very rewarding.

I slowly became like my mother...hating change. Without really realizing it, I had become very conservative, both morally and politically.

I still remember the day old Mr Lewis told me he was selling the bank. I was depressed for days. I knew he didn't have a choice, the big banks in Chicago had extended their competitive tentacles into our area and our bank just couldn't compete with them any more.

The last day Mr Lewis worked he told me the bank was becoming a branch of First National of Chicago. He said they were sending a Manager from their home office...a Mr Tony Gabriel, to take control of the bank. He didn't know anything about him.

I remember thinking how I would probably hate the guy...some big city "know it all" who would be totally ignorant of rural community values, and probably wouldn't care to know. Just another step in his "upward mobility" career within the huge corporation.

I'm sure the portrayal of my life up to this point appears to be a boring existence. But, believe it or not, I actually had become quite happy with the simplicity of small town living. That's why I was feeling so sad, and fearful, that everything would change when the new manager arrived.

Working for the only Financial Institution in a rural area can be fulfilling for a young woman like myself. Banking emits the aura of respectability and class, especially if you have ranking in the bank like I did as Head Cashier. Now I was fearful of losing my comfort, my ranking, my tranquility.

Mr Lewis had abdicated his role as the social conscious of the bank sometime ago. He chose me to be the bank's representative within the community, allowing me ample time to be active in the Chamber of Commerce and other civic organizations. These extra-curricular activities were the sum total of my social life. I was sure the new manager would take over these functions...performing civic duties always looks good on a resume' and in a personnel file.

I remember the day I returned from lunch, my weekly Chamber of Commerce meeting. Marcia, one of my tellers, met me at the door.

"The new manager is here," she whispered. "And you're not going to believe it. Tony is a woman! Toni. Get it?"

"What," I blurted out. "He's a woman? Wow, we didn't see that coming did we?"

As I hurried to my desk, Marcia followed on my heels. "She wants to see you immediately," Marcia said nervously. "She knew your name and everything. You had better get in to her office."

I deposited my purse in my desk drawer and headed for the new manager's office.

Marcia called out to me, "Kathy, wait a minute. I have to tell you something else before you go in."

"What is it Marcia?" I snapped. I was on edge anyway, and Marcia was beginning to bug me.

"She promoted me to Head Cashier," Marcia blubbered out. "She told me I now have your job."

I stopped in my tracks. "What?" I murmured. "She did what?"

Marcia repeated herself.

"Did she say anything else," I asked hesitantly. "Did she say what I would by doing."

"No she didn't Kathy. I'm sorry. That's all she told me."

My heart began to pound. The first thought that came to my mind...they're going to fire me to cut cost. I would be the most obvious choice...I was the one who was over-paid.

I felt totally disheartened. Where would I work in this one horse town now. There was nothing that I would qualify for that could ever afford me the status and money that this job did. I was scared.

"Come in," I heard a firm female voice say..

As I walked into her office my plight was forgotten for a moment. I was temporarily stunned by her appearance. She was definitely a city girl, and so young...so beautiful, stunning.

She was impeccably dressed...not the kind of clothes you could buy around here. I suddenly felt clumsy and ugly...classless.

Her voice startled me. "Have a seat Kathy," she politely ordered while pointing to a chair in front of her desk. "You look just like your picture."

She noticed my puzzlement. "Did you forget about the photographer we sent here three months ago? You know, he came here to take pictures of the bank."

"Oh, yes, I remember," I said smilingly. " But, I don't recall him taking pictures of me!"

"Yes, he took several of you at your desk. He was quite taken by you. He not only thought you were pretty, he thought you were very, very photogenic. See, you had an admirer and didn't realize it."

I forced a smile, unsure of the protocol in this situation.

"I'm sure Marcia has already told you I promoted her to head cashier," she said quietly. "She's a cute little thing, maybe a little young for that position, but my sixth sense tells me she'll do well once she gets the hang of it. Don't you agree?"

"What about me?" my voice barely audible. "Am I fired?"

"Fired?" she laughed. "Of course not. Is that why your so tense? You look like a frightened little school girl. No, your not fired. I'm promoting you to my personal assistant."

I felt such a surge of relief I didn't hear her continue talking.

"What's that?" I blurted out. "I'm sorry. I didn't hear what you said."

"I said my information shows you're now making $25,000 a year...right."

"Yes," I said. "The previous owner was very generous."

"Well," Miss Gabriel said. "How does $50,000 a year sound?"

I was stunned! $50,000 dollars! I lived very comfortably on my present salary...she was going to double it! I didn't know what to say.

"Is there a problem?" Miss Gabriel asked.

"No...oh no, there's no problem," I said. "But isn't that a lot of money? I'm not sure I'm qualified for a job that pays that much. You are aware you could have your choice of anyone for that salary."

"I realize that Kathy...and I really appreciate your honesty. But, I want you... and yes, you're qualified because I know you're capable of learning.There is one thing that I expect, however, and that's your full obedience... doing exactly what I order you to do, no questions asked. Some of your duties will appear to be non-bank related but I expect your full compliance in performing these duties as they arise."

I barely heard her mention her expectations...her requirements. I was still thinking of the large salary.

"Can you live with those guidelines Kathy?" her voice asked firmly.

"Oh yesss, I can do that Miss Gabriel. Anything you ask...I'll try to be the best employee...ever. I'll do my best to be an able assistant."

"Good," she said as she ushered me from her office. "I had maintenance set up a desk in the office next to mine. I want you to have an office of your own because...well occasionally, you may need some privacy. Okay with you?"

"Yes, and thanks again Miss Gabriel."

A private office! I couldn't believe the turn of events. And the money. I wanted to skip to my new office, I could barely contain my happiness. ______________________________________

Miss Gabriel was extremely patient in training me in how she expected things to be done. It was a pleasure working for her. She even allowed me to continue being the bank's social representative with the local charities and professional groups in town.

She was a city girl though and spent as much time in Chicago as possible. She rented a small apartment in town, nothing very elaborate, but she drove to Chicago every weekend, sometimes not returning till Tuesday or Wednesday of the following week.

She often spoke of the beautiful Condo she owned in the city and how much she missed it. I was quite sure she didn't plan on living here very long. I began to envision my next promotion, Manager of the Bank! Maybe my High School friends were right...I was going to be a big success. Needless to say, I was on top of the world.

One day Mrs Gabriel called me in to her office to discuss, of all things, my wardrobe. She wasn't very kind with her assessment of my clothes and suggested I do something about it. I assured her I would.

Later, that same day, she called me in again. "Listen Kathy, I don't think you can find the type of clothes locally that I suggested you wear. I have an idea. Why don't you come to Chicago with me this weekend...no, we won't even wait for the weekend. We'll leave Friday morning, shop Friday afternoon and all day Saturday. How does that sound?"

It sounded exciting and I told her so. I hadn't been to Chicago in ages. With my new salary I could afford to shop in some of the more expensive stores she had suggested. ---------------------------------------------------

That night I went by my mother's home to borrow a suitcase. She was on the phone when I entered the house. It was apparent from the conversation she was trying to tactfully turn down someone who was calling her for a dinner date.

"Who was that?" I asked when she hung up the phone.

"Oh, someone I met at Beverly Jackson's party last week. She's always having these parties to try to match people up. It gets to be boring after awhile. I've told Beverly I can find my own dates...to stop putting me in these uncomfortable situations. She doesn't listen. Her heart's in the right place I guess."

"Well, I don't understand why you don't date more, mother. Look at you...every woman in this town is envious of you, your looks, your financial independence. You're one of the most beautiful women in the whole county...I bet you haven't been on three dates since dad died two years ago."

"And it's none of your business is it?" she snapped.

"No, I guess not. Listen, I'm going to Chicago this weekend with my boss. I need to borrow a suitcase. Are they still stored in the basement?"

I didn't wait for an answer...I went to the basement and picked one out.

"Why are you going to Chicago?" she asked when I returned upstairs. "If you're going with your boss it must be a business trip, huh."

"No mom. Actually, were going clothes shopping. Anything you need while I'm there?"

"No, not really. By he way, I stopped in the bank the other day. I thought you might be free for lunch. Your were out...as usual. Anyway, I saw your new boss talking to a client. She looks like a real classy woman...beautiful too. Do you like her?"

"Yes, I really enjoy working for her mom. And I told you before what kind of money I'm making. Everything is going extremely well for me."

Well, I'm happy for you honey. Have a good time in the city. Be careful, okay." _____________________________________

Friday morning Miss Gabriel came by my home early...like six AM. She had a beautiful car...a Mercedes, the interior, all leather, was exquisite.

I had never seen her in anything but business clothes. She was wearing a light blue halter top and shorts. God, she had a stunning body...it was hard to believe that she was still unmarried at thirty years old.

Once we hit the freeway she set the speedometer on 90...I think it stayed there all the way to Chicago. Usually I have a real fear of high speeds, but surprisingly, this time it didn't seen to bother me. She was so confident, so adept at handling the car, being afraid just never entered my mind.

Her Condominium was absolutely beautiful...just as she described it. Certainly nothing like it in my world, that was for sure. Top floor in a sky rise, four bedrooms, and floor to ceiling windows on three sides. Huge windows everywhere. What a view, especially overlooking Lake Michigan. It was no wonder she came back here every weekend. I was curious as to how she could afford it.

We freshened up while awaiting the doorman to bring up our bags. A doorman! I couldn't believe it. My God, this was living.

We arrived early enough to take in a fine restaurant for lunch...the food was exquisite. Miss Gabriel ordered for both of us since I admitted to her the menu was foreign to me.

She thought that was so cute, so innocent. I thought it was embarrassing. Anyway, it was an excellent lunch, and after a few glasses of wine, it was off to the finest stores in he city.

Shopping with Miss Gabriel was, for lack of a better term, a very strange experience. I was totally intimidated. She began by selecting all of my new clothes for me. She would ask whether I agreed with her choices, but asked in a way that implied, don't disagree with her.

When she insisted on paying for everything I finally objected. I tried to tell her I was perfectly capable of paying for my own clothes. She told me it was a bonus for doing such a good job for her.

Fortunately, I agreed with most of her selections. I just wasn't sure I could wear any of it in a small conservative town. For the most part, her choices were extremely revealing...and suggestive...especially the short skirts, low cut blouses and sweaters.

I had to admit, I felt like a little girl in a candy store, not like a twenty five year old responsible woman. And I was openly embarrassed when she came to the counter with twenty five pair of thongs and hosiery. I actually began giggling...having totally succumb to her generosity.

Another two hours of shopping for sports clothes, shorts, socks and shoes, I think I was nearly in shock...especially being introduced to the privileges of the rich. She simply gave her address to the department manager with delivery instructions...we didn't have to carry a thing!

Leaving the store, we stopped for a quick drink before returning to her car. I never felt so obligated to anyone in my life as I did to her at that moment. I truly believed she had a heart of gold.

We didn't go out for dinner that night...she ordered a pizza sent in. We spent the night sipping wine while I tried on some of my new clothes and, with some prodding, and more wine, I modeled some of them for her. Not ever owning clothes so revealing, I was a little embarrassed...thank god the wine numbed my inhibitions.

Saturday morning. The day was beautiful. She had breakfast sent up to the Condo from a restaurant on the first floor! All the services of a fine hotel...it was amazing!

She wanted to go shopping again. I made her promise she wouldn't buy me any thing else.

Never having wore thongs before, I felt completed naked under my skirt. And her other little quirk...no bra's...I felt absolutely devilish as my large breast swayed with every movement I made. In short, I felt a little slutty.

Driving thru the city she suddenly remembered something important she wanted to discuss with her father. We changed course and drove to her father's home. It was...it was a mansion! A butler met us at the door!. A butler for gods sake.

She knew my question without my asking. "My father's the majority stock holder and chairman of the bank," she said. "The family also owns an Insurance company among other things. We have a lot of money,"

I now knew why she was so confident when authorizing my large salary. The nagging fear I had been nurturing, that someone from the bank's home office would call one day and say my salary was excessive, went away.

Her father, a very young looking middle age man, and quite handsome, gave his daughter a big hug and admonished her for not coming by in over 4 months.

They excused themselves, going into a large office to talk. I wondered around a large room looking at expensive art. Actually, having zero knowledge of art, the "expensive" was an assumption. Within thirty minutes we were back on the road to shopping.

She shopped, I watched. When she decided to purchase a blouse for me, I could only rally up a token objection. The blouse, pure silk...so sheer...I didn't have a clue where I could ever wear it.

That night we went bar hopping. Wearing some of my new clothes, I was extremely self conscious. The feeling didn't last long. By the third club I was tipsy, the first time since high school I had drank this many drinks. It was all so exciting to me, so alive, so exhilarating.

The third club was packed and almost instantly we were separated from each other. Someone put a drink in my hand, then another, and another. I lost track of the drinks. And the guys were not very gentlemanly...pawing and groping, hitting on me at every turn. .

Suddenly, someone genty tugged at my arm. "Sit down here girl," a young woman shouted. "You look like your lost. These guys will stop bothering you if you're sitting here with me."

"Thanks," I blurted out. "This place is a mad house isn't it."

"Yes, it's always like this, the beautiful woman said. "By the way, are you with anyone?"

"Yes," I shouted above the din. "She's here somewhere. She went off and left me."

"Well, she shouldn't leave you by yourself in this place," the stranger said. Especially someone who looks as good as you. "Would you like to dance?

"What?" I asked in amazement. .

"Would you like to dance?" she repeated.

"With you?" I asked dumbfounded.

"Do you hear or see anyone else asking you?" she snapped sarcastically.

Just at that moment Miss Gabriel appeared.

"What are you doing Jessica?" she said coldly to the woman.

"Toni, girl...how have you been?" the beautiful woman asked. "Haven't seen you around recently. How have you been?"

"I'm fine Jess...now what have you been telling my friend?"

"Nothing, Toni. You know me...always coming to the rescue of young lady...and she certainly appeared to need rescuing. She looked so lost and...so...so innocent... I had to do the right thing and help her out."