Meeting a world famous celebrity is something that most of us will never experience. Having what can only be described as intimate relations with one is just a dream that most of us have had at some point. Whether it's Madonna or Maradona, we have all fantasised about giving a celebrity a good seeing to. However, for most of us it remains just that - a fantasy. Unless, like me - and my name's Steve, by the way - you are one of the fortunate few lucky enough to live out your fantasy…
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Joining the army wasn't always my main ambition as a child. Like most young boys, when I was a kid I always wanted to be a professional footballer, pop star or Hollywood actor. The only problems I encountered were the fact that I'm no good at football, can't sing to save my life and have about as much chance of becoming an actor as I have of getting pregnant - zilch!
So eventually I decided on a career in the armed forces. Let's face it, travelling around the world, legally being able to carry a weapon (and fire it) and being paid for the privilege can't be bad, can it?
Anyway, to cut a long story short (ooh, Jesus, flashback to the 80s and Spandau Ballet!) I joined up and chose to join the Royal Military Police regiment. My brother used to be in the RMP and had told me many great stories about his time with them, although before I joined I figured that they were just a figment of his imagination - how wrong I was!
It all started on a fairly normal day. There I was, stood on the parade ground with my sergeant shouting obscenities into my ear hole and calling me a nancy boy! A great bloke, my sergeant! Anyway, as the day went on I got assigned to guard duty. Fucking great, I thought. I get to spend all day stood at the gate to our barracks in the fucking pouring rain! Just what I joined up for!
And then, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, up popped my sergeant again.
"I've got some good news for you, Lance Corporal," he said, handing me a piece of paper. "You're being reassigned."
Great! Just when I was beginning to enjoy standing there in the freezing cold, getting completely soaked!
"Oh right," I said, taking the piece of paper.
"You're a lucky man," he said, with a somewhat envious look. "You're being transferred to the protection division."
He then set about explaining what was happening. I was basically going to be playing babysitter to some up themselves celebrity. They'd apparently been receiving death threats and their agent was taking them seriously. Rather than hiring some minders of their own, they'd decided, under the circumstances, it would better to get some official help - and who better than the RMP?
I immediately had visions of some over the hill actor or sports star, who'd planned the whole thing himself just to get a bit of publicity to kick-start his flagging career. As yet, no one had told me whom it was I'd be protecting.
I got my gear together and was then briefed on professional etiquette whilst protecting a so-called 'star'! I was still in the dark as to who it was. Soon enough I was being whisked away in a helicopter to a destination as yet unknown to me.
We were soon setting down on what looked like a hotel; where I was told this particular celebrity was staying. It was only then I was told whom I was protecting. I couldn't believe it! No washed up actor or sports star. It was none other than Britney Spears! Now I know what you're thinking (yeah right, what a load of bull!) but I swear that every word is true - just as true as me being responsible for the invention of the light bulb! She was in England to promote her new single or something; to be honest I'd stopped listening. All I could think of was the fact that I was going to get to meet Britney Spears!
After being introduced to her, I was told what was expected of me - to put it in its most basic wording, I was expected to die in the pursuit of protecting this goddess of the pop world. No problem, I thought. We all have to die sometime. It's amazing the effect a young, pretty, sexy, and not to mention successful female has on the male psyche! Again I missed most of what was said; I was too busy staring at Britney's…well, bits! Unfortunately, she caught me staring a little too intently at them! But to my surprise, all she did was blush and give me a little sexy smile. Maybe she was attracted to uniforms? I fucking well hoped so!
Later that night I was surprised even further by the fact that I was going to have to stay in her hotel room with her. Now that's what I call close personal protection! I was a little gob smacked as you might expect. One minute there I was, stood at the entrance to an army barracks in the pouring rain with nothing to look forward to except a long hard day stood there like a lemon! And the next, I'm in Britney Spears hotel room - with no danger of being arrested for the privilege! The day was certainly turning for the better.
The only problem I now had was what exactly do you say to a world famous pop star? She would have no doubt heard all the corny chat up lines in the book, as well as a couple that aren't even in the book probably! It was like a dream. I was sat just feet away from Britney Spears. She looked even better in the flesh than she did on the TV. Again my eyes immediately focused on her breasts. And a bloody nice pair they were too! Implants or not, I couldn't have cared less, the fact is they were just as good as I'd imagined all those times late at night when I used to…well, that's another story entirely!
Suddenly the silence was broken.
"You've got a habit of doing that," she said, scaring me half to death.
"What?" I asked as innocently as I could, although the answer was obvious.
"Oh, you know!"
She again looked at me with a little sexy smile. I could feel myself beginning to blush and looked away. "Err…Sorry about that."
"Don't worry about it. As seen as though you're here to protect me, I guess you're entitled to some perks of the job!" she giggled and winked at me.
Now to me this was beginning to become a little too surreal. Things like that just don't happen to me. But sure enough, there I was sat in a hotel room with Britney Spears - alone! And, it may just have been my imagination, but it seemed like she was chatting me up!
Her easygoing manner made me feel a lot more at ease. I managed to calm down slightly and for the next half an hour or so we chatted away like old friends. Not about anything specific, we just chatted; from the weather (how corny can you get?!) to our private lives. We were getting along like life long buddies! Eventually she decided to take a shower.
"Want some company?" I jokingly asked.
She didn't reply. She just looked at me and gave me that sexy little smile, and seemed to blush slightly. Ooops, maybe I over stepped the mark? She didn't complain, however.
"I'll be back soon. Why don't you order us some supper from room service?" she said, before going into the bathroom and shutting the door.
I'll do just that, I thought. Along with a bottle of wine…or two! Not that I was going to try and get her drunk, you understand! Goodness me, no! That would be entirely against my professional ethics. I was there to protect the poor girl from nutters and psychos…you know, people like me! No, there was absolutely no way that I was going to try and get the most famous pop star in the world today drunk just so I could have my wicked way with her. Although…
I picked up the telephone and called down to reception. Just then I heard a blood-curdling scream from within the bathroom, followed by cries for help. Oh fuck, I thought, some nutter's managed to get in and has attacked her. I leapt to my feet and drew my sidearm before rushing to the bathroom. I tried the door - it was locked. Of course it'd be locked, you fucking dickhead, I thought. One of the sexiest women on the planet was in there! And the last thing she'd want was me walking in on her whilst she was taking a shit!
Suddenly there was another piercing scream, followed by the cry for help, only this time it sounded even more pitiful than the first occasion. I couldn't waste any more time. I took a step back and lunged forcefully at the door. It gave way easily and I came crashing down on top of it as it hit the floor. I quickly got to my feet, raised my weapon (not that, you dirty minded bastard! My sidearm!) and scanned the room…nothing! Just Britney stood against the far wall staring in horror at the bathtub. I walked over to the bath and looked in…would you believe it - a spider! Britney Spears had just taken ten years off my life because of a little spider…well, actually to be fair, it was quite a large one…the spider!
It was only then that I noticed what I couldn't believe I missed in the first place. She was completely naked. Britney, the princess of pop, was stood only feet away from me completely starkers…not a stitch on…nude…in the buff…oh you get the picture! Well, what could I do? What the hell do you think I did? I took in as much of the sight as possible! She really was gorgeous. Not just in the face, but her whole body. She was probably as close to perfect as you could ever find. Her whole body was tanned, from head to toe. Her large breasts looked amazing. They didn't sag an inch. They just hung there, firm and bulging (three cheers for silicone!). And what a pussy! I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, but she really was a natural blonde - take my word for it!
Her tight little patch of pubes were shaved in a V, as if trying to say, "This way to the promised land!" There wasn't an ounce of fat on her. I just wish that I'd had a camera on me - I could have made a fortune selling the pics to newspapers and magazines!
Anyway, after I'd stopped perving at her I did the gentlemanly thing and disposed of the offending creature. I then handed Britney a towel and apologised for so obviously enjoying the view! Thankfully she didn't make an issue out of it and I then left the room, picking the door up and jamming it into the entrance as I left. I then noticed that the other RMP officer who'd been standing guard outside the room had finally responded to the cries for help. A bit fucking late, I thought. If it had been some gun-wielding maniac we could have both been dead by now while this sad excuse for an RMP officer was tugging off in the hallway! Anyway, I kept my gob shut and explained to him what had happened. He then left the room - in fits of hysterics!
It was about half an hour later when she finally emerged from the bathroom. She was wearing only a towel wrapped around her still wet body. She sat down next to me and had a quizzical look on her face. After a moment or two she turned to me.
"I'm sorry about that, Steve. It's just I've got a really bad phobia of spiders…I hate the little bastards!"
"It's no problem," I said. "That's what I'm here for."
"Still, it's a little embarrassing," she looked down at the floor, a look of humiliation covering her face.
"Honestly, it's not a problem. You've got nothing to be ashamed about. We're all scared of something," I assured her, trying my best to make her feel better.
I bit the bullet and put an arm around her shoulder. Her head flopped sideways onto my chest and she put an arm around my waist and hugged me tightly. We just sat there for the next ten minutes or so in silence, holding each other. I figured that the main reason she was so upset had nothing to do with the spider - it was more than likely, in fact positively, the death threats that she'd been receiving. Let's face it, if someone starts sending you messages that they're going to kill you, you do start to…well, shit yourself!
Now what happened next, I promise you I hadn't planned. I would never dream of taking advantage of a frightened, defenceless young lady. But sometimes circumstances dictate!
The fact was that her towel had come loose slightly, and being a lot taller than her, I could see straight down her cleavage. At this point I was beginning to believe that I might just be a little too obsessed with her breasts than was healthy for me. But what the hell! This was Britney Spears and I was going to get as much of a perv session in as I could!
Just then something strange happened. My being seemed to be taken over by someone far more confident than myself. I found myself lowering my head and kissing her gently. To my amazement she didn't resist. I then kissed her more forcefully and again she didn't resist. In fact this time she kissed me back with relish, her mouth opening slightly and before I knew what was happening we were in the middle of a full-blown snog session.
We kissed passionately for a few minutes; every now and then I'd divert attention to her neck, which brought quiet moans of approval from her lips. By this time I had what can only be described as an iron hard cock! I decided to see just how far she was willing to let this go. I slipped a hand under her towel and searched out her breasts. I could feel her nipples harden as my hand brushed against them, again bringing moans of delight from her. I began squeezing and fondling each breast in turn, convinced that at any moment she'd break the embrace and say that it was all a mistake. She didn't.
I now knew that I could take this to its inevitable conclusion. I stopped kissing her and stood up. My hard cock had formed a tent in the front of my trousers and she reached out and stroked it through the fabric. I leant forward and removed the towel still covering her body - she didn't try to stop me, in fact as I did that she unzipped my flies and pulled out my cock and began stroking it slowly.
I looked down at her naked body, tanned and still glistening with water. Just then I had an attack of conscience. "Are you sure about this?" I asked, hoping for a positive response.
"Yes," she whispered and then spread her legs slightly. "I want you to taste me."
You don't have to ask me twice!
I knelt down between her spread legs and could smell the aroma of arousal. Her pussy was visibly wet and I reached out and began rubbing her mound with my hand. She threw her head back and bucked her hips. I took the hint and lowered my head. I drew my tongue up her swollen love-lips and she moaned approvingly. She was so aroused that her clitoris was clearly visible, poking out like a little rosebud. Slipping two fingers into her wet entrance I began to finger fuck her whilst licking and sucking on her swollen little clit. She was moaning and writhing above me, her hands on the back of my head gently grinding me into her wet pussy.
I continued to stimulate her with my mouth and fingers as her breath quickened and moans became more audible. I sensed she was close to cumming and so quickened the pace of my fingers and tongue. She suddenly began bucking her hips wildly and I knew she was on the verge.
"Oh yes! Mmm, I'm cumming…don't stop! Ohhh!"
I did as instructed and continued my stimulation. She was trying hard to stifle her moans of pleasure (she didn't want to attract the attention of the other RMP officer who was standing guard outside the room) but it was all in vain. Suddenly her body shuddered and she let out a loud succession of moans and inaudible sentences. I could feel her pussy spasming around the fingers I had buried deep inside her, and her whole body seemed to be in convulsions of sheer ecstasy.
When her orgasm had subsided, I removed my clothes. My cock was still rock hard and aching for some attention. Britney stared at my hard member approvingly. Now I'm not going to lie, I'm by no means the biggest bloke in the world but I'm not small either. She seemed more than pleased with the 7 inches of hard throbbing flesh stood to attention in front of her. She sat up and shuffled across until she was sat right on the edge of the sofa. She then wrapped her hand around my length and eased back the foreskin, revealing my purple, throbbing helmet. She began by flicking her tongue over the engorged end, to which I let out moans of delight whilst trying to force my prick between her lips.
She continued to tease the head of my cock with her tongue as she wanked my shaft and fondled my balls. It didn't take long before I felt the onset of my orgasm building within me - after all, this wasn't any ordinary girl playing with my cock, it was Britney Spears!
"Britney, stop!" I cried. "You're gonna make me cum!"
She looked up at me. "That's the whole point, isn't it?"
"Well, yeah! But…" she had a point! After all, I'm sure I'd have no problem getting a second erection, especially with Britney working her magic on my cock! "Good point! Carry on!"
That she did. She began taking the head of my cock between her lips and sucking and licking eagerly whilst still quickly wanking me off. A few seconds later I couldn't hold back any longer. "Oh fuck! I'm cumming…"
She took the first 3 or 4 inches of my cock into her mouth and held it there as she continued to pump my meat with her hand. I felt the first jet of cum shoot from my twitching cock. Britney didn't even flinch. She simply held my cock between her lips and continued to milk my balls. After each jet of cum that shot from me she moaned approvingly as she swallowed every last drop of my sticky jism.
Even when my cock had stopped shooting my spunk, she continued to lick and suck it, seemingly relishing in the thought that she'd made me cum. I could feel my cock beginning to deflate between her lips and she finally relinquished her hold on me.
She looked straight up into my eyes and smiled. A little of my semen began seeping from her lips and she quickly sucked it back in and swallowed, a look of pure satisfaction covering her face.
"You enjoyed that, didn't you?" she asked knowingly.
I was speechless. I simply nodded my approval. I knew one thing for sure, though. Contrary to press reports, she was certainly no virgin!
She still had her hand wrapped around my semi-erect cock and was still wanking me off slowly. A last dribble of cum escaped from my prick and she quickly lowered her head again and licked the head of my cock clean.
I then sat down next to her on the sofa and for the next ten minutes or so we just sat there, fondling each other and kissing. Eventually I felt myself harden again. A look of excited anticipation played across Britney's face as she stroked my hardening cock to a full-blown erection.
"Ready for some more, are we?" she asked, gripping my cock firmly and beginning to wank me off again.
Well, what could I do? There was no way I was going to refuse!
We spent the rest of the night fucking, sucking and licking each other like a pair of sex-crazed maniacs…and it was great!
I never saw her again after that; at the end of her tour she left for home and I went back to my base. But I'll never forget those few hours of sheer ecstasy in the arms of a pop queen.
A few months later, Christina Aguilera came to Britain for a tour. Well, I couldn't pass up a chance like that! I again set my usual plan in motion and began to send anonymous threats. Just days later I got the news that I was going to be put back on to protection duty. I really do love my job…!