Cancer Treatment-The Beginning

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It's ten o'clock in the morning and already
a scorcher.  Thankfully, the hospital is
air-conditioned.
I arrive on the second floor and walk
to the door marked with big red
letters you can't miss, 'chemotherapy'.
My hand tentatively wraps around
the knob and I hesitate before entering.
Pink leather recliners border the room
and the nurse beckons me to the third
chair on the left.  I walk past Margaret
in her silly fishing hat and she nods
without a smile.
Tessa sits quietly running her fingers
through the blond curls on her youngest
boys' head while he holds her hand (his
way of helping).
And I'm always amazed to see  
Miss Patricia (although why everyone
calls her that I don't know). She is
perfectly made up: lips lined and glossed
in a deep red, cheeks deeply blushed,
eyes covered with blue shadow, heavily
lined in black, and lashes coated
thick with mascara.  Gold earrings
dangle beneath the silk
scarf tied stylishly around her head.
She brings glamor into our cancer room.  
I am the new girl;
unsure, frightened, and welcomed
by friends I've only known for a week.
I take my chair and Julie swabs
my arm with alcohol.  
Tessa's little boy looks on as the IV
needle goes into my arm.  He is horrified
but smiles for my benefit. A remarkable
child.  Fluid pushes through the tubes
into my veins as I recline and open a
magazine.  I am far from alone with this family
in the room and the strength of your hand
covering mine.  I know you are with
me even if you are not here.
For a moment I close my eyes and feel
the tugging of small fingers at my hand.
Little David places a peppermint into my
palm.  'It helps my Mommy's tummy', he
says.  Such is the love of this six-year-old.
I touch his curls and know why his mother
strokes so lovingly.  He returns to his
mother's side and I let my head fall back
to rest.


  • COMMENTS
4 Comments
tazz317tazz317over 11 years ago
LOVE MAKES THE WORLD REVOLVE

and true love assists in other ways TK U MLJ LV NV

LeBrozLeBrozalmost 16 years ago
██

I look at it this way ~ julie's (normal jean) feedback is quite constructive on another level. It shows how much of an impact this piece has, to get such a thoughtful response.<br>

<br>

This has a subtle kind of horror to it in the way the whole scene is portrayed in such a casual way or as such a normal everyday event.

normal jeannormal jeanalmost 16 years ago
I hope

you don't take offense, so many people here do when I comment on their work and I am pretty sure it's because I am not considered an equal because I lack that pretentious piece of paper with an MFA on it...

On your line breaks, some of them are so tight, so "perfect" by this I mean, professionally perfect...that they are sharp when read, I don't know how to explain this any better... too abrupt, too tight.

and then there are the lines are are almost out of place compared to the others. I don't like those perfectly, abruptly ended lines, they are what I call sterile, but that is only my opinion. They seem devoid of emotion as if intentional. So many seasoned,published poets write like this. I think they call them enjambments? anyway...

The parts in parenthesis are wholly unnecessary, you do such a wonderful job with the rest of the poem., I would say that the boy holding his mom's hand is understood without that additional explanation. That is a beautiful piece of narrative.

One more thing...the form, it would read easier if you broke up the paragraphs or wrote it as a prose piece without those line breaks you worked so hard on.

Thanks for sharing something so difficult, very touching.

NJ

KOLKOREKOLKOREalmost 16 years ago
On human bravery

A narrative on quiet human bravery.

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