Jungle Tom Ch. 01byMad_astronaut©
Ch. 1 - Britney Cleans Up
I want to explain how this lifestyle came about, but because it is so unusual, I'll try to keep it brief.
I'm a 33 yrs old Englishman who spent most of his early years in low-paid dead-end jobs but at the age of 29, I inherited a significant sum of money.
I decided to retire.
Although the money was not enough to make me rich, it was enough to make me financially independent and after spending some of my inheritance travelling around the world, I decided to put the rest into savings.
I found myself a small village in New Guinea and decided that I would live there for a few months until I decided how I would chose to spend the rest of my life.
It seemed to me like a nice quiet corner of the Earth to find a bit of peace and the locals were friendly and led simplistic lives.
Now let me make this clear.
New Guinea is still a remote mysterious place, even today, and what I didn't realise at the time was that the very place I had chosen to live was a also a secret haven for wealthy westerners to find solace from the pressures of their responsibilities.
In fact, it was so secret, that even major celebrities would appear from time to time, safe in the knowledge that not even the intrusive media or the opportunist paparazzi would disturb them whilst staying here.
In short, it was one of the best kept secrets in the world of show-business, so secret in fact that not even the highest moguls in Hollywood were aware of it.
My first experience that I would like to tell you about was the day that a young famous pop-star appeared in my village and how she became the catalyst that caused me stay in the village for longer than I had intended.
I remember the day well.
It was during the wet season and the air was thick and humid. We only had a few hours of sunshine because of the cloud cover, but there had been enough sun for me to maintain my new tan.
There was talk in the village because a new arrival from the U.S.A had just turned up complete with an entourage of around eight people.
All I knew at that time was that the guest in question was female and that she was a big star in the west but hardly anyone in the village had heard of her.
She didn't appear happy to come here, but she had been advised to come so that she could take a break from the stress of her life.
It was supposed to be a sort of therapy for her and give her a break from drugs.
Although she had her own hut to stay in, (it was comfortable enough) by her own affluent standards, it was a little primitive for her tastes.
Although she would be comfortable during her stay here, she wasn't pleased about having to give up her modern luxuries. I had the displeasure (or maybe pleasure) of meeting her on the second afternoon after she had arrived.
Now, it is a custom in my village that all residents must do their share of the chores.
Foreign guests were exempt from this rule, but new residents were not.
Although I was British, I had to chip in the same as everyone else. As a new man in town, I was given the dirtiest of jobs. It was my filthy honour to look after the village toilets which consisted of three wooden-huts with holes in the ground.
I didn't mind this because I only had to do the job two days a week. The rest of the time, I did as I pleased.
On the particular afternoon in question I was in one of the huts sweeping the floor when the door opened and in walked a young lady.
My first reaction was to stop what I was doing and see who had entered. It would have been rude to continue in case the person who had just come in needed me to leave. They may have required some privacy.
When I saw who just walked through the door, I realised that I had just set eyes on one of our foreign guests.
I was looking at a white woman.
I could tell that she was a tourist because she was wearing shorts, tee-shirt and a baseball cap. There was enough jewellery on her fingers to make me realise that she was not short of money.
She didn't appear to notice me at first but after a few seconds she did (much to her surprise).
I guessed that she was drunk. She did not appear to be pleased to see me.
"What the fuck?" she squealed.
"I'm sorry," I stammered, "I was just cleaning in here. I didn't expect anyone to come in."
"Yeah, well, I'VE just come in," she said as she glared at me.She could not focus straight and her eyes rolled as she spoke.
"Well, if you like, I'll go away and leave you in peace," I replied.
"Yes, you do that," she answered, but then she took another look at me.
"Hey you're not a native," she slurred, "you're a white man."
I decided to take a good look at her. She was quite attractive in a slutty sort of way. She wore her shorts high on her big muscular thighs and I noticed that she had fairly large breasts. She obviously had no bra beneath her very loose t-shirt because I could faintly make out the outline of her large nipples.
"Are you looking at me?" she asked, "Are you fucking getting an eyeful of me?"
She seemed familiar but I could not place her face.
"I'm sorry," I spluttered, "but I think that I have seen you before."
She laughed at my words.
"Too right," she answered, "you must know who I am!"
I still wasn't sure, so I said nothing.
"What's your name?" she asked.
"Tom," I answered.
"Well, Tom," she replied, rolling her eyes again, "do you mind leaving? I have to use this fucking hell hole and I need my privacy."
She leaned forward as he spoke to me and I managed to get a look down her loose t-shirt. Her left areola came into view.
It was so goddamn close to a nipple slip that I froze, and my eyes became firmly fixed on her ample chest.
"You looking again?" she snapped.
"Sorry," I said, "I'm just leaving."
"Get out then," she snarled, but this time I caught a glance at the whole nipple as she swung her arm.
When she saw me looking, she giggled.
"Stop looking at me, you rude man."
I could tell that she was used to being in the public eye and however much annoyed she was by being stared at, she was also secretly pleased by it too.
She asked me to leave the hut but ordered me to wait outside for her.
I left the mud-house and on her instructions I waited near the door. She told me that she would call me when she had finished. She wanted escorting back to her hut and wanted me to undertake this task.
I had only waited two minutes when I heard her scream from inside.
I opened the door and went back in. She was crouching over the hole with her shorts and panties around her ankles. She quickly pulled her panties up but her shorts remained close to her feet.
She was scowling with frustration and pointed downwards at her shorts.
"They are so fucking dirty," she squealed, "don't these people have proper bathrooms? I'm covered with crap."
I looked down at her shorts. They were stained with mud (and God knows what else). She stood up, staggered slightly, and then she bent down again and completely removed her shorts. She was now standing in t-shirt, trainers and panties. I took her shorts from her, being careful to hold them at arms length.
She glared at me again.
I threw the shorts onto the ground.
"Take me back to my hut," she commanded. "I'm Britney Spears and I shouldn't have to put up with this!"
Now I realised! I knew that I had seen her before.
I looked at her again. She was a little bit fat but she didn't look as bad as she did when I last saw her in a magazine.
She wasn't as good as she looked as a teenager either but I figured that having lost a little weight, she was somewhere on her way to being beautiful Britney again.
I walked her back to her hut.
Like most of the huts in the village it was a tree-hut.
She had to climb a wooden ladder to get back in. I managed to get a good look at her pantie-clad arse as she clumsily worked her way up. My god, her ass was big and slightly flabby but it still looked erotic.
I felt myself getting an erection.
To my surprise, she then asked me to follow her up the ladder and into her wooden home. I did as she requested.
When we got inside the hut, I saw how comfortable it had been made for her.
Unlike the rest of the homes, she had a nice comfortable bed. There were tables and chests of drawers too.
I wasn't quite sure where the rest of her people were but I gathered that they were inside their own huts going about their own business.
Britney sat down on her simple but comfortable makeshift bed and lit herself a cigarette.
She offered me one but I declined as I did not smoke anymore.
After a couple of puffs on her 'cig, she then did something that blew my mind.
"Tom," she said to me, "I have a problem."
She reached over to her vanity case that was resting on a straw table. She took out some perfumed cloth tissues and much to my shock she yanked down the back of her panties and stuck a tissue down there.
Although she had to stand up to do this, I did not see any flesh as she was facing me.
I noticed that she was rummaging behind her back and trying to wipe inside of her panties.
"This is one of the few moist sterile-wipes that I have left," she said.
I can't believe that I've just been to a dirty smelly can in the jungle and that there's nowhere to wash. I need to clean my ass."
I was gob-smacked but then she said,
"Tom, normally I have somebody to check this for me, but my usual assistant is not with me. Would you do me a favour?
I want to make sure that I have cleaned my ass. Would you check it for me? I don't want to get sore."
"Sure," I replied. I did not know what else to say.
She turned around so that her back was facing me. She pulled her panties down a little so that I could see her big glorious ass cheeks. I was completely taken aback when next she splayed her cheeks and showed me her crack.
"Get closer!" she snapped.
I got down on my knees and crawled towards her. Inside her crack, I could see two long ass hairs but her butt was smooth.
I did not know exactly what she wanted me to do so I pushed my face in closer so that I could have a better view.
"It looks fine to me," I said.
"Don't try to fool me," she retorted. "I'm not as dumb as you think. If you're going to check me out, then do it right. Wipe my asshole with your fingers and then tell me if I'm clean or not."
"Go on," she commanded and she almost fell over as she said so.
It was a reminder to me that she was still not too sober.
I did as she asked and pushed my hand between her cheeks. They felt warm and soft. I touched her anus with my fingers.
"Don't get any ideas," she snapped.
"I wouldn't normally let just anyone do this. It's only because I've been forced to stay in this filthy jungle hell-hole."
Her words reminded me of my place, but I didn't care. It suddenly occurred to me that I was beginning to get a tremendous thrill out of this.
As my fingers rubbed across her brown eye, I began to notice how slippery and wet she was there. I was sincerely hoping that this was just sweat and nothing else. It was a very humid place and every foreigner became sticky in such a climate.
"Well go on then," she said impatiently, "do you think that I am clean or not?"
"How can I tell?" I asked.
"Sniff your fingers," she snapped, " that's what my woman in California usually does, but she's not here, and usually I can use a proper bathroom."
I obliged and took my hand out of her. I sniffed my fingers. They had a mild perfumed smell to them. I suspected that it was the sterile tissue that she had just used.
"I can't be sure," I said.
"Well put some ointment on your fingers and clean me then," she demanded.
I did not ask where she kept the ointment but instead I put my fingers back into her ass-crack and started to rub.
She seemed to like this and gently rotated her backside as I did so.
"You're not using the ointment," she purred, "your fingers are too dry".
I did not know what to do, so I leaned forward and stuck my tongue in there. Her back was turned towards me she could not see that I was using my tongue and not my finger.
The first thing that I noticed was the smell of her bottom. As my face approached her cleft, I could clearly see her asshole, but my clumsy nose was the first to make contact with her flesh.
I smelt her aroma. It still had the perfumed smell but there was something else as well.
I don't think that she was completely clean!
I licked away. I even managed to get one of her ass hairs between my teeth and I sucked and grinded at it for a few seconds.
She was clearly getting tired of standing and ordered me to lie flat on her bed whilst she crouched over me so that I could continue nibbling at her.
She must have realised by now that I was using my face and not my fingers but she said nothing.
As I continued with my tongue job, she complained that I was taking too long and asked me if I had finished yet. I was enjoying the big shapely arse that hovered above my face and did not want to stop.
After a minute or so she became tired of crouching (maybe because she was still drunk) and she collapsed and fell completely on my face.
Despite being almost suffocated by her, I continued to lick away. She eventually fell asleep.
I pushed her off and she rolled onto her side. Because her panties were down, I now managed to get a good look at her cunt. The lips were thick and fleshy, just as I had expected and I noticed that she was still shaven, just as she had been in her paparazzi photographs.
The difference was that she was not as clean-shaven as she had been. A few stray pubic hairs were in view.
There was also a triangle of stubble that I could see had started to grow back.
I snuggled up to her as she slept soundly and I even managed to pull one of her tits out of her shirt and have a quick fondle of the nipple.
By now, night had fallen and although the noise of the village had stopped, the noise of the jungle had become louder.
I crept off her bed, stepped out of the hut and slipped down the ladder. I did not want her to find me there in the morning and I especially did not want a member of her entourage to find me. She must have had at least one of her bodyguards staying in the village and the last thing I wanted was a big over-protective American security man giving me the creeps.
I never saw Britney again because she left two days later but much to my surprise she left me a gift. One of the tribesmen came and gave it to me. It was a small box and when I opened it there was a note inside. The note said:
"Dear Tom, I have left you a keepsake.
I know that you have seen this intimate part of me before and I know that you have played with it.
I've decided that you can have it.
It's about time that I trimmed anyway!
Remember and worship me forever
Love, Britney x"
I looked inside the box again but all I could find was a single hair. I could not tell if it was a hair from her head but then again it did not seem long enough.
I then realised that it must have been one of her two ass-crack hairs.
I took the hair in my hand and placed it against my nose. It had a strong smell. There was still a hint of perfume but the stronger smell was something more human. I recognised it immediately.
It was the musky smell of a female but there was also the dirty smell of an un-wiped asshole.
I started to smile.
'Britney's not so good without someone to look after her,' I thought to myself. 'Maybe she ran out of tissues!'