Look Ma, No Hands!bySelena_Kitt©
I got an interesting bit of feedback from a reader the other day:
"Great story, but you can't call it a blowjob if she uses her hands. If the hands are involved, it's called a handjob - that's cheating! Blowjobs are all mouth and nothing but the mouth..."
And how come no one ever told me about this rule?
I certainly didn't know about it the first time I took a cock into my mouth—I remember using my hand to keep a little control, to prevent myself from gagging on the length. It's rather scary to have a rigid press of flesh in your mouth for the first time that way, slowly turning a man you thought you knew into someone all low growl and furious drive.
Of course, over time, a girl gets used to sucking cock. Some of us grow to like it... love it... even crave it. Perhaps "need" wouldn't be too strong a word, here... for some of us, anyway. Once you're used to the throb and thrust of a cock, once you've learned how it behaves in your mouth, you don't necessarily need that barrier of a hand wrapped around the base anymore. But it can still be fun...
After its initial safety use, does the hand lose its utility? I mean, without the hand (and more specifically opposable thumbs) we wouldn't have much of an advantage over the animal kingdom, right? Those opposable thumbs allowed us to make tools - so why not utilize that skill to work, well... his tool? Doesn't that make sense?
In fact, from what I understand, changing things up, at least near the beginning of a blowjob, is a plus. Guys seem to like the different sensations of a warm, wet mouth, the flick of a tongue, the squeeze and tug and even twist of a hand, the slap against a cheek or a breast... it's all good, right? Granted, when he gets closer to the finish line, a consistent motion serves to take him quicker to the finale, but don't guys enjoy the tease for a while before this point?
Well, according to at least one reader... not so much. (Okay, yes, I'm going from a database of one, here, but if you take statistics into account--isn't there a law that says if one person sends you feedback, there are at least 100 others out there who feel the same... or something like that?)
But why? What is it about a woman not using her hands during a blowjob that's so appealing to some men, then, I wonder?
I can understand that the mouth feels good—better, even, than a hand. Having been on the receiving end of both in the realm of my own (albeit differently formed!) genitals, I can say that I do prefer the press of a tongue to the rub of fingers. However, I don't object to fingers, not in the least. In fact, I enjoy both of them working together down there, rubbing and licking, licking and rubbing... it's a deliciously wonderful combination.
So why the objection to a hand in the realm of the cock? Isn't there a saying—two hands are better than one? So two hands and a mouth should be... nirvana! No? I admit, when I got this feedback, I was initially bewildered... befuddled... bemused...
Why the rejection of the hand? The fascination with just the mouth?
And then it occurred to me! (Coincidentally—or maybe not so—I had a cock in my mouth at the time, lathering it with all sorts of cock-loving attention, when the light bulb went off over my head...)
Perhaps it's just that men are so used to women not liking or wanting to perform oral sex, that when they do finally get a blowjob, they want the whole mouth and nothing but the mouth. A woman using her hand seems like cheating because... well, a handjob is really little more than masturbation with someone else's hand.
Am I onto something? I think I might be.
As a fellatio enthusiast myself, I can't imagine not wanting to use my mouth during a blowjob, or in fact, using my hand to minimize the amount of time a cock spends in that particular orifice. I love the taste, the feel, the hard thrust and final white-hot culmination—I love it all. But what would it be like, I wondered, for a woman who didn't appreciate what I do about the cock?
I tried to put myself in her place... it wasn't easy, but I managed... and suddenly, it all made sense. I could now understand how a woman who really didn't like having a cock in her mouth might use the hand to keep the beast at bay—how she might just keep up that consistent handjob motion to bring him off a little faster while she occasionally licked and sucked at the head. And, of course, she'd be able to avoid the coming-in-the-mouth issue altogether if she wasn't balls-deep when the moment arrived...
Then I looked at it from another perspective. On the receiving end of oral, I definitely wouldn't appreciate a whole lot of rubbing and just an occasional lick. I could definitely see how that would feel "unfair" or like "cheating." Fortunately for me, most of the men I've been with have been oral sex enthusiasts and wouldn't think about not primarily using the tongue.
Statistically, though, I think there are more men who truly enjoy cunnilingus than women who feel reciprocally the same about fellatio. Which is a shame, really. And while now I totally "get" the feedback that was sent to me about a woman "cheating" when she uses her hand -- I would like to point out that this "rule," across the board, doesn't always apply.
Don't forget, some women really love sucking cock, and for those of us who do, using our hands allows us to play with our favorite toy with much more vigor and enthusiasm. Would you give a girl an ice cream cone and then tie her hands behind her back?
Well, maybe that's not the best example... because that image is rather hot! But you understand what I mean, right? A woman who hates ice cream (I can't fathom that any more than I can fathom a woman not loving cock, but whatever!) will bolt that thing down as fast as possible. (And probably go throw it up later! Ugh.)
But a woman who loves
cock ice cream? She's going to use all her senses to enjoy the experience. Hands aren't bad, not when they're used with the best of intentions. In fact, they can be a great asset for those of us who truly enjoy orally worshipping at the Altar of Cock Ice Cream.
So if you're lucky enough to find a woman who enthusiastically loves cock, let her use her hands, her mouth, her breasts, her feet, her... whatever! Because for that woman, using her hands isn't "cheating" - it's a bonus! And if you happen to be with a woman who you suspect doesn't really enjoy her time down there with the cock... then maybe you should
find another woman consider asking her for something a little more reciprocal in the oral sex department?
I don't blame you for feeling cheated by a woman who is more interested in getting a blowjob over with than appreciating it, who uses her hand more than her mouth to keep the experience at arms length... but please, don't punish those of us who are cock-lovers with some blanket "Look Ma, No Hands!" rule because of the slights of those out there who aren't...
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