She waited for him.
While she waited she thought of him, his sweet young face, his muscular lithe frame, his dark rock star hair. How she wanted to kiss that face, to take his lips with hers. How she wanted to let her fingers slide through his long hair and press her body against his, to feel her skin against his. She wanted him, wanted to be part of him if only for the too short moments of a lovers bed.
It hadn't been his body that had attracted her at first. No, and in fact, she had not been attracted to the silly boy at first. On their first meeting, long before now, long before he should have been thinking of such things, he had told her he loved her. Of course, she had laughed it off especially after her son had told her that the boy thought she was hot. A teen infatuation with a friends mother was all it was she told herself.
Several years later, he moved into the neighborhood. Before long he spent more time at her house than at his own. His parents complained at first but he reminded them that he was 18 and they stopped, knowing it was a lost cause.
He still told her he loved her but now made no bones about what he meant by it. She still laughed it off, or tried to. She played off his advances with humor, gently mocking his advances or ignoring them all together.
His cock-sure attitude and maturity came through in their conversations and she gained respect for him,for among other things, he was dedication to his music. With respect came admiration and then suddenly she began to notice his muscles while he played and how his hair fell across his face. She noticed his strong, sure hands as he played the guitar. She found herself wishing he would play her body with as much passion.
That thought troubled her. How would her family react, how would his family react, how would society as a whole react to such a disparity of age. On reflection, she realized that his young age didn't bother her, it was societies pressures that made it taboo. Even so, she told herself, it wouldn't be right.
She did however begin to crave his company and accept his subtle advances, a touch on the leg here, a snuggle on the couch there. Then began the verbal sparring, her telling him if he were 10 years older he might be able to keep up with her, he saying he was experienced enough to satisfy.
Just as she began to drop her objections, she noticed a sharp decline in his attentions. At first she felt as if he had been playing with her emotions, but then he began talking of a girl at school. She'd never fooled herself into believing that they would have a relationship more than the odd friendship that they shared, only hoped that it might become physical. Now there was this girl in his life. She committed herself to letting her physical feelings go. To forgetting her longings and not tear herself apart over his relationship with this girl.
Her commitment to herself lasted all of 12 hours. He cuddled up to her and reignited her wants. She spoke to him, knowing how inappropriate their relationship was and not caring anymore. Could they still flirt while he dated this girl? Of course, was the answer.
So how far was too far, how far could the flirting go? As far as you like, was the answer.
She knew better. She also was fairly sure he had no idea where his untested line was. So she tested it.
She started by getting up and standing behind his chair, casually playing with his hair. He closed his eyes. She ran her fingers through his hair and caressed his head and neck with her practiced hands. He laid his head back with a pleasant grin on his face. As her hands slipped down his neck onto his shoulders, she asked again how far could she go. Again the same answer.
She ran her hands across his shoulders and down his arms. His breath quickened as she ran her hands across his chest then back to his hair. She bent over reaching down his chest and bringing her face on level with his nuzzling his ear and neck. Too far? She whispered in his ear trying to contain her own quickened breath. Again he answered no.
She stood again and placed her hands on his face. He opened his eyes as she bent over him. She looked him in the eyes, her own eyes, she was sure showed the want. If they didn't the gravelly tone of her voice did, can I kiss you? She didn't hear the answer, her blood was pounding in her ears,but she knew it was positive. Bending over him her upside down lips found his. Soft at first as he met her lips with his then as passion began to overtake them their kiss became more vigorous, but then something. . .she felt his energy change.
Pulling away from his lips she nuzzled his ear again trying to form words in her muddled brain. "That's as far as I'll go without you asking me to" she whispered.
"I don't care how far you go" he whispered back.
He objected that Mary was fine with it, but she felt rather than heard the kernels of guilt and doubt begin to grow.
Just then she heard her son coming downstairs so she quickly stepped away.
As she drove him home that night he chattered and joked, changing the subjects so fast that she couldn't get the conversation back to their kiss. She had a distinct feeling that he feared telling her what she already knew. It wasn't until she pulled into his driveway that their was a pregnant pause and she jumped clumsily into it, her own worst fears playing in her head. "Are you okay with tonight?" She knew he wasn't, "I'm sorry," she said without thinking then wondered what she was sorry for.
"We'll talk about it later, k?"
"Okay," she answered feeling like a silly teenage girl who'd just embarrassed herself.
Later that night she noticed he was online but couldn't bring herself to IM him like she normally would. She was afraid that she had acted predatory and taken advantage of someone with much less experience. It was he who messaged first but mention of that evening was pointedly ignored. Finally she asked the question. "Should I have apologized? I'm in a gray area here." she wrote
"I know. I wouldn't mind it..."he wrote. For a moment she wasn't sure if the apology or the kiss was what he was talking about. As he continued she realized that it was the kiss. ". . . but to be honest. . .I felt bad. I really do love Mary and she's trusting me to an amazing point and I don't want anyone else at the moment. I don't want to hurt her in any way. You know?"
She'd known it was coming, but it still made her sad to hear it. She'd known it while she was enjoying his sweet lips. She began to grieve the flirting because even if it didn't lead anywhere, it was fun and made her feel good. She read on.
"Wanna go back to the way it was before today?" he wrote next as her heart gave a happy jump, " Maybe someday we'll do that stuff...but right now I love Mary and I can't do that to her. I hope you understand."
Now she was smiling. It boggled her mind how such a young man could gently but definitively turn her down but give her hope and promise that things wouldn't change between them. She was glad, it wasn't per say a rejection so it didn't hurt like one. In the same token he showed he was honorable and cared for both of them enough to protect them both.
"I do understand. That was part of my concern. I know you love her. I don't want to mess that up, and I don't want to mess up our friendship. I really do value that," she answered.
"Same here. Are we cool then?"
"Yes. Still flirt though?"
"I said go back to how we were before."
"It really does make me feel good," she admitted then thought for a moment about the kiss. It had been so delicious to kiss him, but that was that the limit for him? She knew if they didn't define limits then someone could get hurt and it might just be her. If things went bad, it would be she who would look like a predator, so it was he who had to set the limit. "So we need to talk about where the line of flirting is," she said.
"Ok," he responded, then after a pause "Not where we went today. That's the line."
She was fairly sure he meant the kiss, but the rest had been rather intimate too and to most, not in the realm of flirting. "The kiss or playing with your hair or both?"
"The kiss." he responded, then after a pause, "I like it when you play with my hair."
When he didn't say more she promoted him, "Cuddling?"
She wished that he would elaborate further because 'cuddling' to her encompassed a lot. But she suspected, just like the kiss, he wouldn't recognize a limit until he saw it. She would have to tread lightly or they might find themselves well over a line before he recognized it. She had to give him the responsibility to draw the lines, she knew. "As long as I know where the limits are, I won't cross them." she said even as she hoped that she could keep her word.
"Ok," he agreed. Then as if needing to justify his rejection of her he said, " I'm not use to loving someone. It feels nice. I don't wanna hurt her, you know."
She was happy for him and didn't want to jeopardize his relationship. Given a choice, he chose the girl. And she couldn't blame him for that choice, it would have been folly of her to expect a regular, socially acceptable relationship with him. It would never happen, it would never be acceptable so for him not to have picked the girl would have been folly.
So for months they flirted and teased, though he seemed to run hot and cold with his flirting. He would cuddle to her but then not react at all when she ran her fingers through his hair or caressed his shoulder. They talked about her need for some small reaction, something to show her that he enjoyed what she did. After that he reacted, but often very subtly.
She didn't cross the line though she found it difficult, even uncomfortable, to keep within the limits sometimes. She lusted after him, though not obsessively as she had before.
One weekend, one of their discussion centered around oral sex. She, who took pride in her skill, and confidently told him that nothing the girl could do would compare to what she could do. Experience and knowledge trumps youth in those respects, she told him. It is a skill that can be learned, she said, and proceeded to tell him that she could teach him some things that he could teach his partners. She of course had laughed when she talked to him, allowing it to be a joke. They both knew it wasn't.
The following week she barely saw him as if he was avoiding her. She wondered if he was feeling odd about her.
The next weekend, when she saw him again, she had decided again to stop acting so silly and try to let the lust die. She'd turned away his playful flirting and suggestions by not responding. That lasted for a few hours until he laid his head in her lap to watch a movie. She couldn't resist putting her fingers in his hair and caressing his neck. Her lust flared, but the next day she fought to keep a respectable distance and made no advances though she did not turn his verbal advances away.
Sunday he went with her on an errand in the city. As they drove, he spoke of Mary for the first time that weekend. He was still in love though as he spoke, she noticed doubt in his voice. He was also frustrated. She seemed to delight in teasing and torturing him sexually. They had not been alone together in two weeks and thus had not had sex, but she delighted in rubbing on him during class and talking dirty constantly. She spoke of giving him head in a quiet area at school, but he knew getting caught would mean expulsion.
"I think I'm going to be expelled," he stated plainly as they drove home from the city.
She looked at him concerned. "You don't want to do that."
"No not really, but she's driving me crazy. She teases me all the time, it's hard to take."
"I know," she answered, then thought of some of the flirting, some of the teasing she had done. "Do you want me to stop teasing you. Will that make things better?"
"No, I like it from you. Besides what you do isn't tease, is it? You mean what you say."
"Yes," she admitted then to deflect with humor, "It would purely be educational of course."
"Educational?" he laughed.
"Oh, yes I could teach you some things," she said in mock seriousness. "It would be purely educational, I wouldn't get any satisfaction from it you see," this last bit was laughed.
"Purely educational..." he was amused, " I think I like that idea."
They chuckled at each other for a few moments before the road took her attention again. She had to exit the freeway to get gas.
When she got back in the car, she had pushed the conversation to the back of her mind, chocking it up to another enjoyable but unproductive conversation.
"So when could I get my first lesson?" he asked.
She looked at him, judging his seriousness. She couldn't tell but she thought he meant it. "Right now?" she tested.
"Here?" she said indicating a side lot of the truck stop. She was well aware of what was and wasn't possible in such a lot. But what she had in mind was well within the possible, if he were serious ;she doubted that he was.
"I don't think that's a good idea,"
Ah, she though, I was right, blowing smoke, but then he continued, "Kind of populated isn't it?"
She shrugged with a non committal sound and pulled onto the street towards the freeway.
Once on the freeway he began again, "What what would you teach me?"
"A little of this, a little of that, things a man should learn." she glanced again at him and wondered again whether he was serious or not. "I could teach you some things now if you like," she said reaching over and squeezing his leg.
"While you're driving? Hands on the wheel woman."
Taking that as his answer she put her hands back on the wheel but proceeded to tell him that she was quite capable of driving with one hand or her knee if need be.
"Oh the images in my head," he said his voice taking on a slightly husky tone. He was well aroused now.
She let the matter drop as she drove and they fell silent.
As they pulled off of the freeway she heard him say again, almost to her surprise, "Where do you want to go,"
She looked at him for a moment. He wanted it and he was telling her so. He was redrawing the line into nonexistence. Home was out, of course, her son was home. In her head she evaluated several parks for fitness and found most of them lacking for that time in the evening. Having not grown up in the area, she did not know where all of the hidden away places were couples could misbehave. Their situation was even more serious as questions would be raised because of their ages. The last thing she needed was to be charged with prostitution. She remembered a suitable place and drove to it, an oil well road off a lightly traveled road.
"Are you sure about this?" she asked the line conversation still in her head.
"Yeah," he answered as if she had asked if he was sure the sky was blue. It was a yes, of course, how silly to ask such a thing.
"Okay," she said as she ran her fingers through his hair and down his neck. Leaning in she nuzzled his ear and kissed down his neck. She pulled back and looked at him for a moment, half expecting him to put the brakes on. She resisted an impulse to test his line by asking about Mary again.
Instead she tested it with the subject of the last line, she leaned in to kiss him. He faltered for a split second then returned the kiss. She pulled away first and looked at him, evaluating. When she leaned in again she placed his hand on her breast. He lightly squeezed it, but seemed distracted when her hand found his crotch and began rubbing his already erect cock.
She fumbled at his belt for a moment before he undid it. She unbuttoned his pants but he quickly pulled them down to expose his waiting dick.
She was thankful to find him as well endowed as she had thought he was. He carried a respectable length and large balls but what thrilled her was his girth. She remembered all too well in her younger years, how she had been disappointed by too thin dicks of young men. She had always assumed that girth came with age, but apparently not.
She briefly caressed it then, more quickly than she had intended, she moved to devourer it with her lips. She had intended to build his anticipation, but her lust for his member overcame her. The console between the seats dug into her side and she couldn't get the angles she preferred, but there was no question that he enjoyed her ministrations. His body stiffened and his breathing quickened. He moaned and whispered 'oh my god' more than once.
She gave him a little bit of most of her techniques, enough for him to want to sample them again, then she followed his body cues to bring him to the edge before backing off a tad and then finally bringing him over the edge. "Don't stop, I'm going to come," he pleaded. She obliged and took his come in her mouth until he was done. She continued to stroke him with her mouth after he was done until the first bits of over stimulation caused him to jump slightly.
She sat up wiping the corners of her mouth with her finger and watched him breath heavily. He looked at her and smiled. She smiled back and kissed him.
"Lesson one," she said, "Things are better when they're not in a car."
"Things are better when they're not in a car," he repeated then with a glint in his eye asked, "What things?"
"All things. I can't get in the right positions in a car. I'm usually better than that. I'll show you in lesson two."
"Yeah, I'll show you this is better when not in the car," she laughed, then becoming increasingly aware how long they had been sitting on the well road she said, "Get dressed."
As they got back to his house he asked when his next lesson was.
"Whenever you'd like."