Revenge of the Nerd Ch. 05byrpsuch©
"How the hell could you tell me he's so special? He latched onto my tits like he was riding a bucking bronco he was afraid would throw him. He had the subtlety of a sledgehammer. If you're trying to pull something on me you'll be so sorry."
"I don't understand. Calm down and tell me what happened."
I related the events to her in rather colorful language. When I got to the end, she had to wait until I finished lambasting his performance.
"Do you really want to know what happened or do you want to be angry?"
"Hey, I'm willing to listen if you think there's a snowball's chance in hell you can make this sound right."
If this had been portrayed in a cartoon, steam would have been coming out of my ears.
"Tell me, did you notice the sensations when he was mauling you, did you notice what it felt like."
I thought about it. "How could there be sensations? He was squeezing them."
"Look, everybody's different. It, well, you're obviously aware that there are lots of nerves in your nipples, right?"
"Well the signals from your nerves go to your brain to be interpreted. How do they get there?" she asked.
I didn't answer.
"They don't magically jump through the air. They are transmitted through a network of nerve pathways that eventually lead to the brain. And where do you think the network is that leads from your nipples?"
She couldn't see me slowly shaking my head.
"I don't know."
"Along the milk duct and through the center of your breasts. There are nerves in there that can be stimulated. But if you're not aroused, the signal they carry if you're squeezed is pressure, discomfort or even pain. When you're aroused, the sensation is pleasurable. At least it is for me. If you didn't stop to recognize what you were experiencing, you may have missed it."
"How do you know all this? You're an English major?"
"He explained it to me. I liked it but I didn't understand what was going on."
"How the hell does he know all this? Is he some kind of fucking doctor freshman?"
"He read it in a book. He reads lots of things in books. Do you think he could get you that worked up by accident? Girl, you had a panic attack."
"I don't know, maybe. I didn't, I just remembered how it was like with those inexperienced guys. I don't think I took the time to think about what I was feeling physically, I just reacted.
"Damn. He's never going to talk to me again. What the hell am I going to say to him? How can I even talk to him? I'm so embarrassed."
I had really let my guard down with her in the rush of unfamiliar emotions.
"I don't get what's going on with him. Sometimes he seems to know exactly what he's doing and other times he seems almost lost. You know he took me to Bob's Big Boy."
She laughed. "Did you ask for the wine list?"
"Very funny. Is there something wrong with him or am I going crazy?"
"He's really good at anything he can read about and he's really good with things he's experienced. Like he gets an amazing psychological read on people most of the time, when their behavior matches something he's learned from a book.
"But some things he's completely clueless.
"The first time I met him he connected with me right away", said Jen. "He was warm, he treated me with respect, just accepted me for who I am.
"So I tried to let him know I was interested. I did the touching thing, his hand, his arm, his chest. I threw back my head to laugh when he said something funny. I did the hair toss. I ran through the whole arsenal.
"So he walks me back to my place, tells me it was nice meeting me and puts out his hand to shake. I've given him every green light I know and he's trying to shake hands."
"Yes. That's what I was feeling. I don't know what's coming next. I don't know if he's going to say something so insightful it will change the course of my life or something so clueless I can't figure how he makes it across the street by himself. He's like an idiot savant."
"Don't you love it? Ashley, it's so cool to see him learning from these situations he's never been in and hasn't read about. I know I'm talking like he's a lab experiment but in a few years, when he's learned all this social stuff, he's going to be almost irresistible."
"He'll still be a nerd. But I guess it's possible. I think I'm going to have to see that to believe it. For now, though, I think I want another chance with him. What do I do? What do I say?"
"Tell him the truth. Tell him how much you liked it up until then and how it brought up bad memories. He's pretty understanding."
The truth; what a novel approach. "Thanks. Maybe I will."
Could I? Should I do it right away? I had thrown him out like he was trying to rape me.
Why did I care? He was just another guy, a freshman and not particularly well off either. I could do much better. Of course, it wasn't like I was marrying the guy. And up until the time I freaked, it was by far the best sexual experience of my life.
And the way he kissed. Wow.
I didn't seem to be willing to just throw him aside. I couldn't put my finger on why not. He made demands of me. He had expectations of me. What was attractive about that?
While I was trying to decide whether or not to call him, I had a small epiphany. Aside from kissing him and the fact that my hands must have been somewhere, I had not touched him the whole time he was working on me.
That was a surprising enough realization, but I understood something more important: it was not because I didn't care whether he enjoyed himself. I was so overwhelmed by the sensations he was giving me I completely forgot to touch him.
That tipped the scales. I had to call him to try again.