Sex & Candy Ch. 02byvelvetpie©
A week passed by without a call from my father. I thought about calling but I just couldn't get past dialing the number. Surely, Daddy would have called if there was a problem, wouldn't he? I slipped into life at the CIA with an uneasy feeling and by the end of the week, I was feeling much better. My classes were manageable, I was beginning to make some friends and the food was fantastic. I worried about gaining weight so I took to power-walking before class and doing sit-ups before going to bed. Every night, I looked at the framed picture of my parents that sat on the top shelf of my desk and told them good night.
When the call came, it wasn't my father; it was my mother's sister, Adelle. "Your mother is dying. You have to come home."
I didn't have time to be numb until I was on the plane. I had to make arrangements with my professors and visit the admissions office to receive my official papers before I could run back to my room and pack. My aunt had already booked the flight for me so thankfully, I didn't have to worry about anything except getting on the plane. That's when the numbness set in. I was still numb when I met Aunt Adelle in the terminal.
She told me that Mom was very sick and that she only had days to live. I didn't have time to be upset because the next words out of her mouth made me livid with anger. Mom had been diagnosed a year earlier with breast cancer and I was the only one who didn't know. Suddenly, everything made sense. Her lack of appetite, her being extra tired after short walks, her loss of skin tone … everything added up to her illness. Aunt Adelle begged me not to be angry; I hadn't been told because Mom didn't want me to worry. My parents wanted me to enjoy being a student at the CIA and they knew that knowing about Mom's illness would be a distraction.
As soon as I entered the house, Daddy was there, pulling me into his arms and letting me cry my eyes out. I wanted to kiss him, not for the sexuality but for the comfort of the connection but I knew that neither one of us wanted to face that just now. Holding hands, we went into Mom's room and stayed there the entire day. We didn't know until the nurse came by that she had slipped into a coma and it was four days later that my mother died. The funeral was horrible and I medicated myself with alcohol through most of it, choosing the solitary silence of my bedroom, rather than the gathering downstairs.
"Hey." I looked up and gave my dad a smile. "Mind if I join you? Adelle is driving me crazy!"
"Why do you think I'm up here?" I pulled a beer out of the cooler I kept in the corner and handed it to him.
I watched him twist off the cap and take a long swallow, my thoughts on how beautiful his lips looked. I knew that he wanted to talk about the kiss but we had buried my mother and his wife today.
"No, Loryn. We can't."
"Because you're my daughter."
"So?" I swallowed some beer, hoping to soothe my aching throat. "Daddy, I love you."
"I love you, too, honey, but … "
"But what?" I stared at him and he looked away. "I want you, Daddy." I set the beer down and walked over to where he was sitting, covering his knees with my hands. "Please?"
He bent down and kissed me, turning his head so that our mouths fit perfectly and our tongues tumbled together, stroking and touching and such a sense of peace stole through me that I nearly passed out. His smell, his touch, his taste transported me back to that first kiss and the exhilaration that made my skin tingle. I wanted him so bad but something was different in this kiss. It felt like he was holding a part of himself back.
Aunt Adelle's voice preceded her as she called up the stairs, her heavy footsteps warning us that we were about to have a visit. I dashed back to my chair and Daddy wiped his mouth, swilling from his bottle. She scowled at us when she came into the room.
"We've got a house full of people here for Joanie and you two are up here, hiding out?"
"We were just taking a break, Adelle." He finished his beer and stood up. "It's a lot to handle, you know?"
"I know, but people are asking for you two."
I shook my head and set my beer back down, forcing a smile on my face. "We'd better go, Daddy."
He held out his hand and I took it as I always did, knowing that our intertwined fingers meant more than just a father-daughter relationship and I intended to show him tonight.