The Bachelorette Party Ch. 02byK.K.©
"It was nice to see you again," Kate said and then turned to leave.
I took a quick look at her sickly looking body and decided I had to know what happened to her.
"Kate. Wait a second," I said.
Kate stopped and turned around.
"Do you think we could have dinner together and you can tell me what you have been up to?" I asked.
"I'd like that. When?"
Looking at her I decided that she needed a good meal with lots of calories.
"Tomorrow night? We'll go to Musso and Frank's.
"That would be nice." Kate said.
I didn't want to leave the impression that this was a date so I didn't volunteer to pick her up.
"I'll meet you there at seven. Is that okay?" I said.
"That's fine. I'm already looking forward to it," she said.
Kate was still very pretty when she smiled.
The third bridesmaid was halfway down the aaisle and I was starting to feel some butterflies in my stomach.
I got to Musso and Frank's about ten minutes before Kate so I had time to think. I was worried that she may have developed an eating disorder and so I planned to watch her carefully to make sure she ate and that she didn't head to the lady's room immediately afterward. I decided that if I sensed that she did have an eating disorder I would talk to Pam about arranging an intervention.
When Kate came in she smiled as soon as she saw me, which worried me a little. I hoped that she wasn't getting the wrong impression. I didn't want her to think that all was forgiven and than after three years we could pick up from where we left off before her bachelorette party.
"Sorry I'm late. Traffic on the 101 was miserable tonight," She said.
We made small take while we waited for the waiter to bring us drinks and take our dinner order. I was pleased that Kate ordered a steak with a baked potato and a salad.
When the waiter left with our order I said, "You were going to tell me what you have been up to these last two years. Why don't you start with the illness that has left you so thin?"
"Actually, it's closer to two and a half years since the last time I saw you," she said. "As to the illness, that happened when I was in South Africa."
"South Africa? What on earth were you doing there?"
"I was in the Peace Corps working with Children born with AIDS."
"You didn't get that did you?"
"No. I didn't get AIDS. We spent a lot of time visiting remote villages with poor sanitation and I ended with a reasonably minor case of dysentery," she said.
"A minor case of dysentery? Have you looked at yourself? You must have lost twenty-five percent of your body weight. That doesn't seem minor to me."
"Well, I guess it depends on your frame of reference. When you see people dying of dysentery almost every day, a case of dysentery that doesn't kill you is minor," she said.
I was stunned. First, that she would join the Peace Corps and second that she treated her dysentery as if were no big deal. I could tell by looking at her that it probably nearly killed her.
"When did you come home?"
"I came back from South Africa three weeks ago and spent the first two weeks in the hospital. I have been back in LA for a week. I have already gained five pounds," Kate said.
"It's going to take me a minute to digest that. How is it you joined the Peace Corps in the first place?" I asked.
"That's the long story and you may not want to hear it because it involves what happen to us."
"I do want to hear it. I can handle hearing whatever you have to say if you can talk about it."
"I know that when you got back from Las Vegas you were in a lot of pain, but what you may not have considered is that I was also in a lot of pain. The difference was that you had me to hate for what happened. I could only hate myself which just made things worse.
"Then I decided to tell my parents the truth about what happened. I figured I owed you that much. I didn't want them to think that our breakup was because of something you did. My parents were really pissed at me for a while but in time they forgave me.
"I was trying to put my life back together when I went to that party and you showed up with Angela. I was so humiliated when she kissed you right in front of me. I guess it was your way of telling me it was really over."
"I had nothing to do with that. Angela decided to do that all on her own. I had no idea she was going to kiss me at that moment," I said.
"I guess she was marking her territory. Letting me know that you belonged to her," Kate said.
"Actually, she only did that to make you jealous. She thought that it was what I wanted."
"Are you still seeing her?"
"No. I knew that relationship wasn't going to last when I saw her giving her phone number to one of the other guys at that party," I said.
"I guess that brings us to the party at Pam's apartment when I showed up with Peter. I knew you were going to be there so I asked Peter to come with me. I wanted him to make you jealous to get even for what happened at the other party. I had too much to drink and wasn't able to respond to the things he was saying. The next morning I unfortunately remembered everything that happened and once again I was humiliated."
"Did you really like him?" I asked.
"Peter? Of course not. He was just doing me a favor. That was the only time I ever went out with him," she said. I ended up staying in my room for two days and Tracy got concerned so she called my parents. My mother came for me and took me home. I was a mess for about a week. I had to quit me job and I couldn't bring myself to leave the house.
"Finally my father made me an appointment with a psychiatrist and made sure that I kept the appointment. I didn't talk much during the first appointment but toward the end of the hour I started to feel comfortable with Dr. Silver. I continued to see her weekly for the next six months.
"I told her everything. I told her all about us and she made me tell her in detail everything that happened in Las Vegas. Most days I just talked and she took notes. It seemed like I felt stronger after each session. Then during one session she told me what her diagnosis was.
"Dr. Silver told me that I had a fear of commitment, which manifested itself in self destructive behavior. I asked her how that could be possible. After all I had been in a committed relationship for more than two years and was planning to get married. Dr. Silver told me that planning a wedding didn't mean that I wanted to be married. She said that I was only twenty-two years old and that I was subconsciously afraid to get married. That I had used the bachelorette party as an excuse to do something to sabotage the wedding."
"That doesn't make sense. You didn't know I was going to catch you, so how would that have worked to sabotage the wedding?" I asked.
"That's right, you weren't supposed to be there but Pam was there and I knew that Pam would tell you what I did. Pam liked you and she would never have let me get away with that. It would not have mattered if you hadn't caught me, you still would have found out."
I didn't say anything. I was wondering if what she was saying was true.
"Can you tell me now why you followed me to Las Vegas?" Kate asked.
"I was just worried that something might happen," I said. I just wasn't comfortable having you go there without me."
"Why do you think you were uncomfortable?" Kate asked.
"I don't know. I never really thought about it. In the end I was justified."
"I am not accusing you of anything. You don't need to defend your actions. I just want you to realize what my doctor pointed out. The reason you followed me was that you subconsciously felt that I might do something stupid. You did what you did in an attempt to save our relationship while I did what I did to destroy it.
"The problem was that I did love you and I didn't want to lose you but I threw all of that away with my self destructive behavior. Can you understand what I am telling you?" Kate said.
"I can see a pattern here that may have a seed of truth to it. I will have to think abut it some more before I can decide what I think about all this," I said.
"I realize that it's too late now. If I had been able to express my fears before things got out of hand we might have been able to save our relationship," she said.
I didn't comment because I thought she might be testing me to see if there was a chance of getting back together.
"Anyway, during my last appointment with my doctor she told me I should go do something that would make me feel good about myself again. That's when the idea of joining the Peace Corps came to me," Kate said.
Just then our meal came and Kate began talking about the work she had done and how sad it was to work with children with AIDS, while at the same time it was enriching for her.
Suddenly my attention was brought back to the matter at hand. Kate had just started down the aisle. She looked great. She was back to her normal weight and looked quite healthy. When her eyes met mine she smiled. Kate stopped opposite across the aaisle from me.
After dinner I walked Kate to her car and told her to take care of her self and make sure she talked to Pam.
"I talked to Pam this morning and she said she needs to talk to you about something important," I said.
"I will. Call me if you ever just feel like talking," She said and then drove away.
I had no intention of calling her. Kate was part of a past life that I didn't want to remember. We had both changed, probably for the better.
Several weeks later I was having a drink with Ted and he asked me if I had a love interest. I had to laugh at the way he asked that.
"I guess misery enjoys company. You want to drag me down with you," I said.
"Come on, be serious. Don't you have a girlfriend now?"
"Isn't it time you got on with your life?" Ted asked.
"I did have a girlfriend a while ago. Did I ever tell you about Karen? I really liked her but I couldn't commit to her so we drifted apart," I said.
"If you could get back together with her, would you?"
"I might if I felt that I could completely give myself over to the relationship. I wouldn't want to hurt her again by leading her on and then not being able to commit."
"John, it's been three years and you are still letting Las Vegas affect you. We don't live in the past; we live in the present and plan for the future. Isn't it time for you to start living again?" Ted said.
"You may be right Ted. I guess it is time for me to move forward," I said.
I thought about what Ted had said several times over the next few weeks until I decided I was ready to move on. I started to think about what Kate had said about her self destructive behavior and realized that I was acting in a self destructive manor. Although it wasn't as bad as Kate's behavior, it was keeping me from being happy.
I wondered if Karen would be interested in giving me another chance. I had changed since we broke up and I believed I was ready to make a commitment. I remembered that my boss had a beach house at Seal Beach. Kate and I had used it a couple of times. I called Jack and asked if I could use the beach house for a weekend and he said yes.
I was thinking a romantic weekend at the beach would be a good the way to get Karen back. I went to the phone and hesitated. Was I really ready for this? I thought about how people change over time and I wondered if Karen had changed. I thought about that for a minute and made up my mind. I picked the phone up and dialed the number.
"Hi. It's John."
"John. This is a surprise. It's nice to hear from you."
"I was just wondering if you would like to go down to my boss's beach house next weekend."
"I'd love to but I'm busy Saturday afternoon."
"So am I. I was thinking that we could drive down Saturday evening and stay till Monday if you are free. What do you think?" I asked.
"That would be great. I don't have to work Monday because I don't currently have a job."
I said, "Great. See you next week."
I was only half aware of Reverend Holcomb speaking and suddenly I realized I was supposed to be paying attention to this part of the wedding. After all it was time for the exchange of vows and I had to listen so I would know when to hand Ted the ring.
I handed Ted the ring and listened to him swear his love with a shaky voice and then Kate handed the other ring to Pam.
I have to admit that I had a huge lump in my throat at the end of the ceremony when Reverend Holcomb said, "I'd like to introduce Mr. And Mrs. Ted Gibson."
Ted and Pam were two of my favorite people in the world and the fact that they had found happiness together made me extremely happy.
After the ceremony I had to walk out of the church with Kate on my arm. Other than when we did the same thing the previous night at the rehearsal this was the closest Kate and I had been to each other since the night we had dinners at Musso and Frank's several months earlier. At the rehearsal dinner Pam and Ted managed to keep us apart I guess because they didn't want to make either of us uncomfortable.
At the reception Kate sat to Pam's right at the head table and I was sitting to Ted's left. During the meal Kate never even looked at me. After the meal I went to the bar to get a drink and had to cross the dance floor on the way so I just started dancing with different people as I crossed the floor. I did the same on the way back with my drink in hand. I walked up in front of the head table so that I could talk to both Pam and Ted at the same time, something that was difficult to do when I was sitting next to Ted.
"You looked beautiful today Pam. I can't imagine why you would waste your beauty on this bum," I said.
"I think he is kind of cute don't you, Kate?" Pam said.
"Yes. Ted is very handsome in his tux," Kate said.
"Are trying to flirt with my wife?" Ted said.
"Of course I am."
"I saw you dancing across the floor," Pam said. "You look pretty happy. Is that because you are so happy for us?"
"Partly but I'm feeling good about myself too," I said.
"Really? Why is that?" Ted asked.
"Remember when we talked a few weeks ago and you told me to start living in the present and planning for the future?"
Ted said, "Yeah, I remember that."
"You told him that?" Pam said. "That's pretty good. It makes me glad I married you."
"So what does that have to do with your feeling good about yourself?" Ted asked.
I looked at Kate before answering, to see if what I was about to say would upset her. She looked like she was interested to hear what I had to say so I answered Ted's question.
"I thought about what you had said for a while and realized you were right. I felt that it was time to learn how to trust people again so I contacted an old girlfriend and ask her to go down to Seal Beach with me tonight and spend tonight and tomorrow night at my boss's beach house. It's just a first step. I hope it works out, but if it doesn't I know I can handle it," I said.
"So who is this mystery girl?" Pam asked. "Anyone we know?"
"I am not sure," I said. "You might know her. Actually, you probably do know her. After all she is your maid of honor."
It took a second for that to sink in and then Pam looked at Kate, who was smiling brightly.
"You're going to the beach tonight?" Pam asked. "Together?"
"Yes." Kate said.
"When did you two plan this?" Pam asked.
"John called me a couple of weeks ago and ask me to go to the beach with him," Kate said.
Pam almost started to cry. "I am so happy for you but why didn't you tell me before now?"
"We didn't want to do anything to take away from your wedding," Kate said. "This is your day. Frankly, I was surprised that John decided to tell you. I though he was going to wait till you got back from your honeymoon before he said anything," Kate said.
"I am glad he didn't wait." Pam said.
"I am glad he didn't too," Kate said. "It makes it seem more real to me. That it is actually going to happen."
"I think we should all get out there and dance," I said, "I want a chance to dance with the bride before you run off to Hawaii with her" I said.
At nine o'clock that night Kate and I were walking on the beach. We didn't talk much. I guess we were both lost in our own thoughts. I was nervous about what was going to happen when we went back to the house and went to bed. Would old memories ruin the night for me? I hadn't had any problem with those memories for a while and I was just hoping that it would remain that way. I thought that Kate might be worrying about the same thing.
When we got back to the house we sat in the dark and watched the ocean through the large picture window.
I felt that it was time for me to make the first step. As many times as we had made love when we were together I would have thought it would be easier to start but I felt like it was the first time which in a way made things a little more exciting.
Finally I just put my arm around Kate and she turned to me. When our lips met I felt the old passion begin to build. None of the women I had been with since Kate and I broke up, including Karen, had ever ignited my passion with just one kiss.
Our tongues probed each others mouths as our hands began to explore each others bodies. I was looking down at Kate's breasts hidden behind her thin shirt.
"Are you nipples ready to get hard," I said. "I want them hard before I suck on them."
They responded and I could now see the nubs in the front of her shirt. Kate gave me a little punch in the arm and laughed.
"The last time you did that to me you really embarrassed me," she said.
"I just wanted to see if I still had that power over your nipples," I said.
"You can stop teasing me now. They are already hard," she said.
I opened her shirt and took her right nipple between my lips and flicked my tongue across it and soon had Kate moaning. I finished removing her shirt and then opened her pants. I slipped my hand into her panties and began to tease her clitoris and occasionally slip one or two fingers inside her. I wanted to taste her when her juices began to flow freely. I pulled her pants off but before I could pull her panties off Kate stopped me.
She gave me a kiss and then started to open my pants. I was pretty sure where that was leading. When Kate used to give me oral sex it was something special. It's not that it was better or more important than the intercourse. It wasn't. It was just that the way she did it to me made it feel special. Now I was worried that what she had done that night in Vegas would change that. It might never be special again.
As I lifted my hips up so Kate could pull my pants off I thought back to that night in the hotel room. I was able to recall the scene with complete clarity. Kate was just holding his cock and bobbing her head up and down on it. She had told me at the time that she only did it to get him hard so that she could get him to finish and leave.
I still had that picture in my mind as Kate took my cock in her hand and began to plant kisses all over the head. Then she started swirling her tongue around the head and finally she took me inside her mouth. The sensation was wonderful as she slowly slid my shaft in and out of her mouth while using her tongue on the underside of the little helmet. It was just the way it used to be and suddenly I know I didn't have to worry about it not being special anymore. What I had seen that night was Kate giving that weasel a blow job. What she was doing to me was making love to my cock. There is a difference. With that worry put aside I was able to enjoy what she was doing to me.
I stopped Kate before I climaxed and had her sit on the sofa and I got on the floor between her legs and slowly removed her panties. As I moved my head in between Kate's thighs I told her to look out at the ocean while I gave her pleasure with my tongue.