When in Caesar's Palacebyscriptwriter45©
INT. TENEMENT BUILDING, HARLEM, NYC - DAY
Two white plainclothes COPS are moving rapidly up a dark
staircase. They are holding drawn pistols. They reach a
floor and move down the hallway to a door. One of the COPS
bangs on the door.
NYPD! Devon Barnes, open the
Footsteps and voices are heard within the apartment. The
footsteps move towards the door.
What the fuck you want? If you
ain't got no paper, get the fuck
(holding up badge to
Here's the only paper I need,
bitch! Now open the fuckin' door,
Barnes. We just need to talk to
you for a second.
The door opens slightly, and MAN #1 peers out. He looks at
the two COPS and decides to open the door a little more. COP
#1 kicks the door open all the way and COP #2 bursts in. COP
#1 throws MAN #1 to the ground and covers him with his
INT. APARTMENT - DAY
Everybody get your fuckin' hands in
the air! Do it now!
Three men are seated on a filthy living room set in the
trashed apartment. The men sense something is wrong. One man
reaches for a pistol on the coffee table.
COP #2 (CONT'D)
Don't touch that weapon! Fuckin'
The man's hand touches the weapon. COP #2 fires a shot into
the man. Chaos erupts as the other men leap up from the
Billy! Just do everybody!
Hey, whatever you say...
COP #2 fires his pistol at the remaining two men, killing
them. COP #1 fires his pistol into the head of MAN #1 who is
still face down on the floor. The COPS flee the apartment and
race out to the street where they enter their car.
INT. CAR - DAY
Holy shit! That was a fuckin' freak
show! I'm so pumped right now!
(driving and shaking head
You were goddamn John Wayne back
there. Bam, bam, bam! Never seen
no shit like that!
I love this cop thing. Gets you
into all the best places.
(agreeing and gesturing
with his badge)
God bless eBay. You can buy any
fuckin' thing there.
No shit. Gotta love technology.
I'm fuckin' starved...let's find
someplace to eat. How about that
diner on the East Side you took me
to last month? Uhhh,
Nah, "Hanrahan's," ya dumb Irish
fuck! Hey, go ahead and text the
Guinea. Say, "The fried chicken
was great. Thanks for the recipe."
COP #2 uses a cellphone and taps out the text message. Upon
completion, COP #2 wipes the cellphone with a rag and drops
it out the window where it is run over by traffic and
So who is this Guinea anyway?
Just some douchebag spaghetti eater
Frankie met in juvie. They get
together now and then. Frankie
says he's an up and comer in the
Jersey Mob. The Guinea's doing a
favor for Johnny Sack.
THE Johnny Sack? The one who runs
the Lupertazzi crew?
Yeah, the very same. Those niggers
had been ripping off some of his
operations in Harlem.
Those stupid ass motherfuckers! I
guess Frankie's gonna get some
brownie points outta this. And us