All Comments on 'Life as a New Hire Ch. 33'

Thank you for that! Alal at last, in the midst of all the other craziness.

Also, pointless criticism, but we're still waiting for an update on the Ninja situation: please please please tell me that is coming in the next couple of chapters?

Excellent work as always: you really will need to publish this story in e-book format. It deserves that.

Enjoyable. I like how you are weaving the story threads together. I hope we will see more for Xmas.

I'll start of by giving a +1 to the comment before mine - this really does need to be made into a book and/or e-book form. Just try taking the first few chapters, editing it a bit to make the transitions smoother and submit it to review at a few local publishers. If it's turned down, then shrug and move along, you'll still have a loyal fan base here. If it's not, then hey! You're in business! Go get a beer, celebrate!

However - if you want to keep your writing casual, and only on this site (along with any other sites you may publish on), don't let us pressure you into it. Still though, give it some thought.

ANYWAY, moving right along into the review part of the comment, I'm having trouble finding anything to critique! I find your style of writing to be refreshing, the story flows even along the multiple view points, and having the 'world news' sections not only gives the reader a glimpse into what the 'average joe' would see in the news, but also the effects that the main characters are having on the world stage. Perhaps my only complaint would be the length of this chapter, I kept wishing for more! However, I know that isn't a real complaint, just me being greedy, I know the next part will come out as soon as your ready.

So, my long comment in review! Seriously think about getting your work published (and not just this - I've also read some of your other fantastic novels), but don't let us pressure you into it. Another excellent chapter in an incredible novel so far, and I frequently check for your latest update!

Keep the creative juices flowing, and publish this!

Cheers,

Dennis

Just simple thank you !

No idea how this story stays as fresh as it does but immensely grateful it does. Enjoyable scene switching and good to see Alal at last.

I do the happy dance whenever I see a new installment come up :D .

Nice Going FS, every time I think I can read half a page before leaving for work.... you make the chapter so good I cant.. I have been late for work 3 times cause I cant stop reading the newest chapter when it is posted... And reread it when I get home just to make sure I didnt miss anything...

re: Dennis's comment...

This story is very good best I have ever read to reedit it or change it in anyway would be kill what makes this story great... LEAVE EVERY WORD ALONE..

. . another . . . : )

...amazing story. Sucked me right in, five *s. But c'mon - Kilbourne?! You could have at least tried Ferguson, heh.

Can't wait for more.

I have lost count.

Exactly for how many more days is cael safe from

Havenstones psycho bitches??

superstory. just loving it.

F.S god bless.

So much so that I am going to be forced to take an evening or two and start at the beginning and re-read the whole thing, darn it, just the get the thread in my feeble little mind again. Seriously good story and writing. I want to get after you about doing some more of the "Mother" series, but don't have the heart to pull you away from this one, even for the time it takes to consider the other story.

Keep 'em coming and we will all be happy.

The current story date is Sunday, July 13, 2014. He started work on Monday, June 2nd, 2014, so his count would be 42 days ~ half way through his 84 day intern period (3 x 28 days - internally the Amazons use a Lunar calendar). The 2nd through the 30th would be 29 days in June. The 1st through the 13th would be the other 13 (double-checking my math) which equals 42, thus 42 left to go.

August 24th would be the last day of his internship so the 'Great Hunt' would fall on the weekend of August 29th, 30th and 31st. Most likely, Cael and Felix (yes, he will be a part of it and yes, they can work together) will be given a day or two head start to check out the terrain and make some plans. In the interim, the Amazons can narrow the field of hunters down to 30, or so. Now, only two Amazons can actually win, so alliances will be made and broken. If either, or both men remain free until sunset of the 31st, they win.

The actual prize has yet to be decided upon. The status award alone will be a big deal...and, if one of the winners also happens to be a candidate for High Priestess...

Dear FS,

Thank you for another awesome chapter in this epic saga.

You and your editors have done a great job in keeping the language flowing. There are, in my mind, few things that ruin a good story as efficiently as poor grammar and vocabulary. Thanks to you I have actually learned a few new words.

Also, the bantering between Cael and Pamela really keeps the story lighthearted and fun despite the impending doom.

Finally, a question: Do you have any estimation on the number of chapters that remain of the story?

Please keep up the good work.

This keeps getting better and better. This is more along the lines of the stuff I write at other sights minus the sex. It sounds like we have a world war brewing at the moment.

As to the hunt, I think Cael has a chance if he is still alive then.

FS, you are The MAANNN!!!!! I am so jazzed to read your stuff, any of your stuff, that I literally can't stay away from Literotica.

Well, there's other reasons, too.

But, if it was only you and a thousand dunces writing on this site, I'd still come here three times a day, every day, to see what is new. And, even though there are a bunch of really good writers on this site, you are THE MAAANNNNNN!!!!!

Stay healthy and have a great Christmas/New Year and all the other... stuff.

While I, too, wish that checking more often would make postings more likely to happen, everything is usually up and posted for the new day @ ~3:00-4:00 AM, EST, barring any technical problems.

themoreyouknow.jpg

... On the DATES.

TEASER to your future chapters were just too much to take in.

I think my brain will explode just thinking about what "YOU GREAT SIR" have in store for us.

I will join you and put a name to it!

Looks like someone else needs to change his meds, and it isn't Final_Stand.

He doesn't owe you jack, shit for brains.

As to "crap writing". Well that's some constructive feedback. Why do you read from FinalStand if he gets you so worked up? Maybe you need medication to control that anger. Most authors respond favorably to constructive criticism, not an attack. Isn't the world negative enough.

PS. Use spell check, it will make you appear more intelligent.

.. goes on and on. Just awesome.

@hopelessly_otaku: Amen!

I'm immensely looking forward to more of Cael et al. Here's to your muse keeping this story line fresh and entertaining for you sir.

When I started reading this epic tale I thought you were a crackpot, as I continue to read said epic tale I am convinced you are a magnificent crackpot. Please continue, I deeply envy your talent. Thank you.

FS,

The spoiler you sent me did not prepare me for this awesome chapter. I would have loved to have read the entirety of Hana's meeting with the "girls". As you mentioned it would have only been better if Aya had shown up and threated Hana to not hurt Cael.

Will Hana's daughter and Aya meet up? If the marriage plays out I would hope they would. Cael would have 2 daughters,(not counting his unborn ones) and then there would be the doting great grampa and great aunts.... Strike that. Maybe thats not the way to go. Alal is not doting. He seems to want to establish family ties, but can Cael trust him? Cael has excelled at turning enemies into allies. Could it happen?

I feel I am doing you a disservice by not paying to read these. I cannot imagine the research that you must have done to write this story.

Thoroughly enjoying where this is going but do not envy you the task of joining all the threads, as others have stated previously I check regularly to see if there is a new instalment, however I would willingly wait if it meant that you were not under pressure to publish the next.

It would be a crime if you took to heart some of the more negative comments, no matter where you get to in a story I always enjoy reading your material.

Keep warm this season with the knowledge that many of us would and will pay for what you are giving us gratis.

You echo greats like Gaiman and Clancy, Adams, and Moore. Oh, and Atwood and Tepper. And Whedon, Tarantino, Straczynski, Moffatt, O'Bannon and Mamet. Dickens! Roddenberry, Lynch, and Serling, Butler, and Herbert. Your writing is funny and smart and sometimes eyes get the shank and characters you thought had a decent amount of plot armor die. This craziness is art. I look forward to whatever comes on whatever schedule you roll with.

My wife is has been diagnosed bipolar, too and II. Happy to chat anytime.

I have read many of the other comments just to see if I wasn't alone in enjoying this tale you are telling, I'm not. I hope there is much more to go. You have created a lot of interesting characters and I want to see how they all end up. Thank you for all the work you have done on this. I hardly ever read published works anymore because they don't compare to what I have found here along with SOL and Finestories. There's even a little sex thrown in now and again.

It's hard to believe that this story turned 6 months old yesterday. Thank you for the great story FS, keep 'em coming.

A candidate for High Priestess gets Cael at the hunt. Wow, the intelligence service I work for proposes Buffy or Kwenhamai as your candidates. (Anat?? nah).

What we are having trouble is who sold the Children's Camp to the Han commandos? The first question always is: Who benefits? Hard to find a amazon spy high up in the hierachy that knew so much about the Camp and had a strong reason to be a traitor\spy.?

I finished it about 30 minutes ago. (8:30 pm, Dec. 10th, 2014). It is sizable - 19,643 words and has a bit of action in it. As has been pointed out, betrayal is rife, trust is often established with a hand-clasp and searching someone's eyes, and you can often judge someone by the company they keep.

Oh yeah, and Cáel is an idiot.

My Friend you are a machine! A truly appreciated machine at that! You keep cranking the chapters out and they are awesome. I just hope you keep some hi-test fuel in your tank so you don't run outta gas. Every new offering on this story is something I look forward to. Thank you so much for your hard work, and letting me read it here.

Yes, 34 is now in and 35 is close to completion as well. I hope you enjoy it and, again, a special thanks to the two readers who contributed critical material to this chapter and the overall story. You know who you are...and I forgot to get permission to expose your complicity.

...Anonymous 12/10/14 asked who within the Amazon organism would have betrayed the location of the daughter's training camp?

That is an incorrect assumption. First I think FS has made it clear that the Amazons were thoroughly indoctrinated into group loyalty.

Second, that the Seven Pillars used supernatural methods, through their shaman's vicious domination of the psyches of deceased female slaves, to gather intelligence. Being dead does not automatically liberate the omen slaves from control by their masters.

your historical note regarding the Viet Nam war is not entirely correct. We (the US and South Viet Nam) could have won militarly had we not been restrained by political considerations. We actually "won" that war just like we "won" in Korea with both sides agreeing to a cease-fire. Per the agreement, the NVA and US removed their forces from South Viet Nam. To no one's suprise, the north had lied and violated their agreement by invading the south once again. Our esteemed congress then proceed to violate the agreement we had with South Viet Nam by refusing to fund the assistance they needed to repel the invasion. The US military didn't lose that war, our Congress (Democratic controlled at the time) did.

Truly great story and writing BUT...

*Again, thank you.*

... your historical note regarding the Vietnam war is not entirely correct. We (the US and South Vietnam) could have won militarily had we not been restrained by political considerations. We actually "won" that war just like we "won" in Korea with both sides agreeing to a cease-fire.

* Pretty much agree with that. As I cover in later chapters, the issues of militaries operating under political constraints comes up A LOT. Everything about a soldier, sailor and airmen costs money from their pre-military upbringing, training and equipment. That's stuff removed from your civilian/political economy aka taxes and potential taxpayers. The willingness of the political leadership to extract those resources from the economy and the willingness of the people to put up with those loses is critical.

Anti-War protesters and draft-dodgers were a tiny segment of the population, but they were a key indicator to the North that all they had to do was hang on until the US political leadership faltered.

If you consider the size and cost of the DMZ in the Korean Peninsula and the theoretical McNamara Line ... of course, we would have still had to deal with Laos and Cambodia ...*

Per the agreement, the NVA and US removed their forces from South Vietnam. To no one's surprise, the north had lied and violated their agreement by invading the south once again. Our esteemed congress then proceed to violate the agreement we had with South Vietnam by refusing to fund the assistance they needed to repel the invasion.

*Which is one of my big problems with the current US-Iran nuclear deal ~ it ASSUMES the US Congress and other legislative bodies across the globe will re-apply sanctions if Iran reneges on key parts of the plan. Those sanctions will mean peoples in their countries losing jobs and businesses losing money. Slavish devotion to someone else's foreign policy promises doesn't help that politician get elected. Color me cynical.*

The US military didn't lose that war, our Congress (Democratic controlled at the time) did.

*The US military is 'Nothing' more than an instrument of the US People wielded by the authorities we elect ... or so the stories go. We train them in peace time. When sent into 'Harm's Way', they are given political missions. If we are lucky, our leaders know what they can do, or aren't capable of and set their agendas accordingly. If we are lucky, the political leaders, after assigning the political objectives, allow the military leaders to decide the strategy and tactics of the campaign. If we are lucky, the military leadership can tell the politicians what can't be done without fear of being replaced by a 'Yes'-man. Again, if we are lucky.*

*Later in Life as a New Hire you get more into events of the Unification War and a peek into UK and US servicemen's view of the Khanate at War. The Khanate's Rules of Engagement are 'Soldiers First'.

Sniper somewhere in an apartment tower? Artillery strike the whole tower.

Enemy in village have your column pinned down so you can't extract your wounded? Airstrike the whole damn village.

Mortar attack from across an international boundary? "It is a line on a piece of paper - Go get them!"

This isn't macho bravado. The Khanate has a limited number of trained men and a limited number of replacements it can provide per replacement cycle. It is in a death-struggle with a vastly more numerous foe and surrounded by large countries (Russia is NOT a friend. Neither is Iran, or Pakistan) In comparison, it has plenty of ammunition and a robust armament industry [dark conspiracy stuff plus a health dose of reality]. There is also the strong undercurrent that service-men and -women are the cornerstone of the new Khanate ~ its premier citizens. It will be a military state where the input of soldiers and veterans counts for more than non-military citizens.

[This is not me, the author, disrespecting democracy in general, or my own democratic-republic. I'm experimenting with an alternate form of government.]*

Another key issue in the Vietnam war was the nature of the South Vietnamese forces. The leadership had a crucial question to answer, "who are we fighting?". Before you say "duh, North Vietnam" the choice the South made was to train an anti insurgency force, not a conventional force. They reasoned, correctly, that the guerillas were the greater threat, especially with the very effective US conventional forces available (including the best air power), were the thing to worry about.

Anyway, South Vietnam could fight the peasants while the US fought the military forces, as long as the US was there. But neither the US conventional forces doing the pr version of bull in a China shop nor a counterinsurgency force one step removed from '1984' actually won the"hearts and minds" of the locals. And as long as South Vietnamese peasants could be found to "beg the north and its communist allies for freedom" the war would never end.

When an army captain in Anbar grew a mustache because "Iraqis don't trust men with no facial hair" we got the Anbar awakening. Of course the US made promises that southern Iraq didn't honor, so those same tribes became the bulk of ISIS...

Honestly imho, the biggest reason we lost was that neither the US nor South Vietnam made any attempt to win the loyalty of the South's population.

But hey, I may be letting my Master's thesis on counterinsurgency training bias me.

I can't believe that he hasn't called Pamela barb wire yet LMAO that should have happened long ago what would the consequences be

Paps

... I can't believe I've missed it either. I'm not sure I can get it into the final chapter, but I'll see about weaseling it into the second phase of this saga. On second thought, I just figured out how I'm going to do it. Thank you. You'v had your impact. If you want to know how, drop me a line.

James aka FinalStand

Hard to believe the delusion [previous comment] that the US won in Vietnam. Or could ever have. As is still going on today. In other countries. The US armed Ho Chi Min and made an agreement with him. If he fought the Japanese, the US would defend Vietnam against any and all enemies. This agreement was immediately broken at the end of WW2. When Vietnam was handed back to the French. To continue to be a slave labour rubber producer. So the Vietnamese continued a way of life since 1887. Fighting a Western imposed corrupt Government, until they achieved independence. They should be applauded for this titanic achievement. The US Government and media should be held accountable for this atrocity. Terry

I apologize for the long delay in responding.

Perhaps I was unclear:

The US's application of air power kept them and the South Vietnamese dictatorship from losing the war even with their constrained Rules of Engagement. Had it not been air power, the North Vietnamese Army and Viet Cong would have overwhelmed the allied forces in the South.

The US 'won' in the fact they did not lose, not in the fact they defeated the North in any decisive manner. Had the US stayed committed, I believe the North could have never won. The Tet Offensive was a Strategic Disaster in Vietnam even while it was a Public Relations Disaster for the US back home. With the Viet Cong gutted, the effort to reunify North and South feel completely into the hands of the North Vietnamese Army and the NVA couldn't have defeated any US army as long as the US Air Force held Air Superiority, much less the Air Supremacy they held in the South.

The over-all Communist strategy was that of attrition. They believed we would eventually decide holding on to the South was too expensive and we'd abandon them ... as we did. In that, the North Vietnamese won and the US lost.

My contention was and is ~ while the US was willing to exercise air power, they couldn't lose. Had they exercises a policy of total air war ~ and risked conflict with both the Soviet Union (unlikely) and China (much more likely) ~ they could have won. I base this on the combination of amount of resources the US ended up devoting to the theater and the British success in the Malaysian Insurgency. The British proved how a jungle insurgency could be won in the same way the French proved how one could be lost.

With the increasing accuracy of strategic bombing, the effectiveness of Ground Attack aircraft & ground-control radio operations, and the evolution of air assault, US air power would have been beyond the ability of the North Vietnamese to counter-act. We didn't use unrestrained strategic bombing for a variety of reasons including not wanting to kill foreigners (aka Soviets and Warsaw Pact personnel) working in the North).

Had we decided to bomb every dam & irrigation network, every power station & and fuel depot, every railway bridge and marshaling yard, every road bridge and every port from warehouses to dockyards (including seeding the ports with mines and establishing a submarine blockade), short of World War III, what could the North have done?

Not only would they have no longer been able to arm their soldiers, they wouldn't have been able to feed their people. Inhumane? People should read up on the fate of Dresden in 1945 ~ a German (enemy) city turned into an inferno merely to make a point to the Soviet (supposedly allied) Army on what the US Army Air Corps could do.

All that being said ~ we backed the wrong side. We had OSS people with Ho Chi Minh when he was fighting the Japanese and Vichy collaborators in 1944-45. The only foreigners in Hanoi when he and his declared an independent Vietnam were US personnel.

We should have told the French 'NO!' when they wanted to return at the end of World War II and supported Ho. Sure, he was Communist, but he was willing to work with us and had worked with the Nationalist Chinese (people tend to forget the leader of the Nationalist, Chiang Kai-shek, spent three whole months in Moscow and sent his son there as well). Has the US enacted a Marshall Plan for Indochina the same way we propped up various European countries, how different the World could have been.

In the final analysis, it takes a combination of the individual fighters having the dedication, equipment and training they need, the Will of the Home Front to sacrifice and both the intelligence and determination of the Leadership to win a war. Also, in war, nothing is guaranteed.

James aka FinalStand

Bad memories but again you bring up questions I have felt have never been answered completely.

Agree we should have blown North Vietnam until they came defeated to the Peace Table. The Chinese?....You are referring to Korea?

The Soviets?...Yes, the argument was Europe,because intervention in North Vietnam would not have been decisive.

Yes we lost because military doctrine was not followed,because the WH politicians micromanaged the war and because Walter Cronkite told us every evening his incorrect idea of what was happening in Vietnam

Most importantly, the lessons we learned were lost with 9/11?

... I think one important lesson has not been lost. We, the American public, no longer blame the rank and file fighting men & women for going off to fight the wars our ELECTED officials decide to send the off to engage in. We are a bit more likely to hold our respective Senators and Presidents responsible for what they voted on, or decided to do, or not do, than 50 years ago.

We also took that lesson into Nicaragua when, after the Communist took over, we didn't invade like we had so many times in the past. Instead, we coaxed the Communist to the polls and the Sandinista held fair elections, lost and mostly left power quietly.

Also, between 1981 and 2000, we tended to hit egg shells with sledgehammers ~ with the exceptions of Beirut, where we left out boys dangling about, waiting to get struck ~ and Somalia, where we went back to micromanaging the war from the WH. During that generation we gave the soldiers, sailors and airmen the political mission plus rules of engagement, but then allowed them to say both if something could possibly get done at what cost and time table, as well as HOW it got done.

Today ... we shall see and be judged by the generations which come after us.

Thank you for your comments and take care,

James aka FinalStand

Nicaragua: "Instead, we coaxed the Communist to the polls and the Sandinista held fair elections, lost and mostly left power quietly." Except that the Communists are currently conducting a campaign of violence and terrorism to corrupt the electoral process and seize power... just like Communists always do.

Yep. One of the sad realities of every communist organization ~ even those who claim to have forsworn violent revolution ~ is the oppressor/oppressed dynamic ALWAYS results in violence. It always leads to marginalizing the concerns of those who would oppose the Communists as they all become "counter-revolutionaries" thus an 'Enemy of the People'. Once they have dehumanized their opposition, it is terribly easy to call for the 'oppression' of those opponents - even their murder.

The Sandinistas 'nationalized' all sorts of things when they won the Nicaraguan Civil War ... then kept those properties in their hands when they were voted out of power including media outlets ... so now they control the narrative inside the country. Oh well ...

Thanks for pointing this out to me. For some reason it hasn't been getting much TV attention in my neck of the woods.

Take care,

James aka FinalStand