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Jane's Journey

byOthermoose©
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Comments (10)
by Anonymous

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by likehotstorys12/18/14

Liked it

Interesting variation on the tentacle theme. Look forward to reading the next part
Tentacle theme storys are a " Like them or Don't ".

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by TJSkywind12/18/14

Ewww

I'm of the don't like category. That aside, I'll comment on the writing and story itself.

It's not Lilly, it's lily as in calla lily or lily pad.

Revulsion is better the revolution (which doesn't make sense as used in the story).

"She realized that the various liquids from the plant may have affected her body." A stronger word to use might be "infected" rather than "affected." But, that could be chalked up to the plant's chemicals turning her into a good little mammal host; after all, that's Jane's assessment post pollination.

Check for missing punctuation -- there are missing commas, full-stops (periods) in the tale.

Obviously the plant is affecting her judgment. If there's a sequel, I expect her to swell and burst with new baby plants. You did mention that she's sucking down water and not having to urinate. Or turn into a walking female swamp thing, covered in vines? Or still pretty much human but shooting paralyzing darts from her nipples and capturing new hosts with tentacles that erupt from her orifices to ensnare other victims? (I can't believe I just imagined that!! Now I'm thinking about that movies Species. Argh!) Or, speaking in a monotone, "Have a pod, John. You'll like it. Trust me."

It's tentacle porn so the plant doesn't have to make ecological sense, so I'll skip my questions on food source, the plant's purpose, and interaction with the local fauna. The purpose of tentacle porn is to fill female orifices which you did. 4* for the writing.

I feel the need to boil some vegetables thoroughly. Very thoroughly.

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by tabbymidnite12/18/14

I do not think it was a terrible story-it was incredibly creative and arousing

It is now in my favorite categories and so are you. Really turned on my oh give me more .... Thank you for writing it now please write a part two I really can not wait to see what happens next. The penetration of all the holes was totally different in a good way. liked the nipple penetration. These vine story are new to me but have loved each one I have cum a crossed.. My body thanks you as well

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by Othermoose12/18/14

Thanks for the feedback

Thank you for the comments and favorites. To tjskywind thanks for the help. I'm still new to this so my writing won't be the greatest. Plus I'm writing these on an iPod so some mistakes are going to happen. I tried to read over everything and fix my mistakes, but I guess I missed some stuff. To everyone else thank you, and part two will be coming soonish, and I think everyone will be a little surprised about where it goes. I'm off for xmas so I'll hopefully have more time to write. Thank you all so much for reading

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by Anonymous12/18/14

Very hot

i loved it and thought it was hot. I can't wait for more! I'd also be interested in seeing a male tentacle story as those are rare.

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by sexgundam66612/19/14

Perfect for me

I love this genre of stories. There were quite a few errors here and there, but there weren't enough to distract from the story itself. I sincerely hope there will be a sequel.

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by Anonymous12/20/14

was great

Was a great story. Thank you for sharing it. Hope for more stories like this ;-)

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by Anonymous12/30/14

nice

i liked it

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by Anonymous02/09/15

nothing wrong with it

Keep up the great work,

ur friend's stupid

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by Anonymous03/26/15

weird ideas put into a good story

The story was pretty good, i like the amount of detail you put in, other authors don't do that.
The whole plant thing wasn't a bad idea but the part where it fucked her breasts and her peehole was weird.

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