Crossing The Line

Sexy story!

This is an excellent job for your first submission, I am definitely looking forward to reading about more of your fantasies.

Echoing first commenter

This is awesome for a first submission (makes my first look like crap, at the very least). Your technique is great, you obviously have a spell checker, and I didn't notice any errors in grammar aside from some very minor ones (using a '--' where a '-' was called for, for instance). That's nitpicky stuff in the grand scheme of things, and it's obvious this is not the first time you've ever put fingers to keyboard to tell a story, even if it's the first time you've opened yourself up for public consumption. :)

Keep up the good work, and you'll have yourself a group of slavering followers hanging on your every erotic word before you know it, you naughty girl. ;)

You did a great job!

Very well thought out, and very well written. You have a nack for describing a scene without boring your audience, which is very nice :)

Trip

Very well done. I didn't realize it was your first posting until one of the other comments caught my eye. A nice job.

Thank you so much for the nice encouragement!!

I really appreciate the feedback! I'm so glad you liked it. I do editing at work, so that helps. (I used the single dash as poetic license. Didn't feel like following ALL the rules!)

Thanks!

Thanks for such an amazing story, it was like i was there in the room with you!

I really do believe your gonna be a regular...

I really loved it. Your writing is Smooth and
carries the reader effortlessly.
Your in my favourites and I can't wait for more.
Warm regards
Peter. X

A great afternoon

Very hot. The first person made it immediate.

Wow!!! I want to meet him too!!!

Hiya, I loved this story, it was so amazing, I really would love to have an experience like that!!! Thank you!!!!