I am so glad that your plan to get Errol away from the slut worked. How did you ever talk her into inviting Dave to the wedding? And getting them together in her dressing room? Pure genius. I know you had a good honeymoon cruise and then the wedding, but whatever order it was in must have been good for you. I have never seen you looking better, but I guess that "glow of being pregnant" you talked about at the family reunion does explain a lot. Keep in touch and good luck.
Yours, Pappy
by
Anonymous03/19/15
Which is Worse
" I didn't want to believe she was the slattern others claimed." How does a Slattern compare with a Shameless Hussy? Worse? Not as bad?
Well it was funny and outrageously implausible, but it made a point. A couple getting married should normally be at the apex of bliss and fidelity. As I have experienced, relationships usually take some time to tank. I guess that's the fun of this story in going against the grain by presenting a brain dead slut bride to a rock solid loyal hound dog groom. The groom picks up the scent of the interloper and bolts. This writer is extremely effective in smoothly casting the characters in synchronized harmony of the plot. Thank you for your five stars effort.
by
Anonymous05/06/15
This is stupid
Those who read the original story enjoyed the ending because it was the kink they were looking for. Adding an unsolicited, unauthorised ending that flips the original author's intentions wins you no points. Write your own work instead of destroying the heart of other people's.
by
Anonymous06/12/15
Dialogue
Your dialogue is stiff and unrealistic. Nno one speaks like these characters. Try reading your stuff out loud and imaine someone actually saying it.
all the critics here are women, they fail to see the brides fault. Thanks FTDS for saving eroll from a miserable life
by
Anonymous07/10/15
Alls well that ends well. If he had ended up with the slut it would have been his own fault.
No one that selfish and stupid can hide it from someone who is paying attention. There are women like this, and there are fools who eventually suffer from them. Living well includes learning how to discern the nutritious mushrooms from the poison ones. She and Dave deserve each other.
@Tavadelphin...Yup, my first thought at the finish was that Errol was simply trading one slut for another.
"It wasn't my fault!" Marie shouted after my retreated mother. "I told her not to do it. That there wasn't time for it. I tried to stop her!"
So the slut Marie's only concern was there wasn't enough time for the Slut Karen to complete her adultery in a timely manner.
Errol's got some SERIOUS problems in his future!
Morgan DeWolfe
In the last few comments, you guys have the wrong idea. So he caught his (ex) wife's indiscretion at the altar and called off the marriage. Taking Marie on the honeymoon cruise that wasn't a honeymoon, it was just payback to the cheating cunt he almost married. I'm sure he knew about Marie, and she was willing. Besides, this is fiction anyway.
by
Anonymous01/03/16
sounds somewhat like my hometown high school
But not the crowd I ran with - unfortunately. 5 stars again!
DHL
Errol's boys should have pushed the cheating cunt down a hundred steps!
- And Errol took the slut Marie on the cruise?!Another dumb fuck!
- This story was total crap,from the original to this half-baked revenge crap!
it may apply to my marriage or i should say the night before... I still have NOT found out what wife did the night before our wedding... I do think something went on after several years later... her long term ex was not in town as I understand... But I have wondered if he got a weekend pass and made it to town ... I still have not got her to say anything about the night before the wedding...
Probably are Married in Most US States, Perhaps Not in Others
Probably are married in many US states, not so in others. Husband and wife initiate the marriage contract by each saying "I do". When an official authorized by the US state (just about every Catholic priest, Jewish rabbi, Protesrant reverend, Wiican priest, muslim qazi, etc.), ratifies the initiation of the marriage contract (that is, states, "I know pronounce you . . .", the marriage contract has been ratified. But the marriage has not yet been consummated, that is hubby and wife have sexual intercourse; and in some states, they may not yey be married, so a judicial action recognizing the "marriage" is a nullity, i.e., an annulment is needed. Some places they might have to actually divorce. And in some countries, like Germany the religious ceremony is NOT of any significance to the German bureaucrats--you have to go the governent registry office and that marriage there is the only one the German government recognizes.
And that's probably more than anyone wanted to know about either of these tales.
by
Anonymous12/01/16
In reply to anon 08-11-16
What you say about the finalising of a marriage in Germany is also true here in the UK.
It makes no difference who performs the ceremony, you are not legally married until you have signed the certificate in front of a legally authorised registrar which is why there is always one in attendance even in a church wedding.
Just thought i'd put my two pennys worth in.
English
I gave it four stars...
... Obviously written tongue-in-cheek, it had an element of truth in it. Typically cheaters always blame others. Panther fan.
Dear Marie,
I am so glad that your plan to get Errol away from the slut worked. How did you ever talk her into inviting Dave to the wedding? And getting them together in her dressing room? Pure genius. I know you had a good honeymoon cruise and then the wedding, but whatever order it was in must have been good for you. I have never seen you looking better, but I guess that "glow of being pregnant" you talked about at the family reunion does explain a lot. Keep in touch and good luck.
Yours, Pappy
Which is Worse
" I didn't want to believe she was the slattern others claimed." How does a Slattern compare with a Shameless Hussy? Worse? Not as bad?
Short concise and powerfully fun
Well it was funny and outrageously implausible, but it made a point. A couple getting married should normally be at the apex of bliss and fidelity. As I have experienced, relationships usually take some time to tank. I guess that's the fun of this story in going against the grain by presenting a brain dead slut bride to a rock solid loyal hound dog groom. The groom picks up the scent of the interloper and bolts. This writer is extremely effective in smoothly casting the characters in synchronized harmony of the plot. Thank you for your five stars effort.
This is stupid
Those who read the original story enjoyed the ending because it was the kink they were looking for. Adding an unsolicited, unauthorised ending that flips the original author's intentions wins you no points. Write your own work instead of destroying the heart of other people's.
Dialogue
Your dialogue is stiff and unrealistic. Nno one speaks like these characters. Try reading your stuff out loud and imaine someone actually saying it.
I BET YOU MY BOTTOM DOLLAR
all the critics here are women, they fail to see the brides fault. Thanks FTDS for saving eroll from a miserable life
Alls well that ends well. If he had ended up with the slut it would have been his own fault.
No one that selfish and stupid can hide it from someone who is paying attention. There are women like this, and there are fools who eventually suffer from them. Living well includes learning how to discern the nutritious mushrooms from the poison ones. She and Dave deserve each other.
Concur Completely! 1* for the finish!
@Tavadelphin...Yup, my first thought at the finish was that Errol was simply trading one slut for another.
"It wasn't my fault!" Marie shouted after my retreated mother. "I told her not to do it. That there wasn't time for it. I tried to stop her!"
So the slut Marie's only concern was there wasn't enough time for the Slut Karen to complete her adultery in a timely manner.
Errol's got some SERIOUS problems in his future!
Morgan DeWolfe
Hmmm...
In the last few comments, you guys have the wrong idea. So he caught his (ex) wife's indiscretion at the altar and called off the marriage. Taking Marie on the honeymoon cruise that wasn't a honeymoon, it was just payback to the cheating cunt he almost married. I'm sure he knew about Marie, and she was willing. Besides, this is fiction anyway.
sounds somewhat like my hometown high school
But not the crowd I ran with - unfortunately. 5 stars again!
DHL
Dumb Twat!
Errol's boys should have pushed the cheating cunt down a hundred steps!
- And Errol took the slut Marie on the cruise?!Another dumb fuck!
- This story was total crap,from the original to this half-baked revenge crap!
Thoughts
"It's not what you think” – They ALWAYS say that, but it’s EXACTLY what he thinks!
Not that it excuses her, but insisting that your fiancée invites her ex-boyfriend to the wedding is just dumb, if not outright asking for trouble!
SOMETHING==OLD-NEW & BLUE
something is nothing good. TK U MLJ LV NV
Lmfao
This was just plain funny!!! I loved it!!!!!
just a note on this one as
it may apply to my marriage or i should say the night before... I still have NOT found out what wife did the night before our wedding... I do think something went on after several years later... her long term ex was not in town as I understand... But I have wondered if he got a weekend pass and made it to town ... I still have not got her to say anything about the night before the wedding...
DUMB AND DUMBER
Stupid is, as Stupid does.
Probably are Married in Most US States, Perhaps Not in Others
Probably are married in many US states, not so in others. Husband and wife initiate the marriage contract by each saying "I do". When an official authorized by the US state (just about every Catholic priest, Jewish rabbi, Protesrant reverend, Wiican priest, muslim qazi, etc.), ratifies the initiation of the marriage contract (that is, states, "I know pronounce you . . .", the marriage contract has been ratified. But the marriage has not yet been consummated, that is hubby and wife have sexual intercourse; and in some states, they may not yey be married, so a judicial action recognizing the "marriage" is a nullity, i.e., an annulment is needed. Some places they might have to actually divorce. And in some countries, like Germany the religious ceremony is NOT of any significance to the German bureaucrats--you have to go the governent registry office and that marriage there is the only one the German government recognizes.
And that's probably more than anyone wanted to know about either of these tales.
In reply to anon 08-11-16
What you say about the finalising of a marriage in Germany is also true here in the UK.
It makes no difference who performs the ceremony, you are not legally married until you have signed the certificate in front of a legally authorised registrar which is why there is always one in attendance even in a church wedding.
Just thought i'd put my two pennys worth in.
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