Daddy's Slave

SPELLING!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jay-ZUZ!
If you can't spell, you can't write.
Your story is to all intents and purposes unintelligible... Don't bother to submit anything again if you have any respect for yourself or your (putative) readers.
How difficult is that to understand?

Have you read this yourself?

Try reading this out loud and then go fix your grammar and context mistakes. A ten inch chick? Really?!

I agree

"I sticks out his tongue and licks it, choosing his lips around it and sucking it."
What the hell is that? Did you proof read your story or just post it while you were jacking off? Please quit typing. You suck.

You're an idiot

Never ever submit a story again. I know I'll never read it. I gave this one a chance dispite the low ratings. I don't know how you got two stars but that's two too many. Yes, readers here are looking for hot sexy stories that push the limits but we are intelligent. This "story" is the epitome of idiocracy. So STOP!

Proofread!

You need to proofread for spelling errors, grammar, and point of view.

Geez - another monkey and a keyboard

"Ride me and rude me good"! Can it get any worse?

gonna give you the benefit of the doubt

and assume english is not your first language. so nice effort. keep practicing.

No stars due to spell check errors

At least read what you type before posting, there may be an ok story hiding in that mess but I am dammed if I am going to read it in its current state.

Ever hear of spellcheck?

Really?

Spell check. Enough said.

What happened to the boy she was fucking when Matthew came in?

basic English

Spell... check

Use spellcheck

So hard to get into the mood when there are so many spellcheck issues to be adrrsssed

This is vulgar garbage. NO STARS.

...

Illiterate incestuous bastard

This is sickening and your spelling is atrocious. In guessing you weren't loved as a child!

Well....

that's a few minutes of my time I will never see again. So many spelling mistakes. Maybe you need an editor or a dictionary. Oh well, time to go now.

...

I thought it was a good story. There were some spelling mistakes but it's your first time. Next time just slow down and go through it a couple times, but it was good. People need to be nicer at least you were trying and did a good story. Thank you.

It wasn't bad like everyone says. Just the grammar/spelling. I would totally read another chapter of this! Don't quit writing like all these people are saying.

4 stars

Could've stretched the ending by adding a few more details feels a bit fast at the end, but keep writing you'll improve heaps with time and a few more stories under your belt.
As to the haters of "daddy's slave" if you didn't think daddy would be involved then your are a mor*n.

Good enough. Maybe double check the spellings the next time!

one of my favorites

more please

Keep writing!

I liked this story, despite the errors. I was a bit confused by the use of the word "chick" at first, but by context, I quickly figured out you meant "dick." It kind of reminded me of this joke I heard a while back:

Steve and Larry are out fishing in a boat. Steve decides to smoke a cigarette and asks Larry for a lighter. Larry pulls out a 10 inch Bic lighter. Steve asks where he got such a huge lighter. Larry explains that he has a magic lamp with a genie that will grant wishes; the genie is the one who gave him the lighter. He asks Steve if he'd like to make a wish. Steve says, "I wish I had a million bucks!" All of a sudden, a million ducks come flying out of nowhere. "Yeah, the genie's a bit hard of hearing," explained Larry, "Did you honestly think I wished for a 10 inch Bic?"

Anyway, not a bad story, keep writing and don't always trust the spell checker to give you the correct word! :)

I get it

Sorry about all the mistakes. I'm not just some "monkey with a keyboard". I appreciate the tips and everything but why be so immature. I obviously they were mistakes and if you made mistakes would you want someone harshly beating your ass about it? If you don't like incest don't click, if you don't like the mistakes click off. Honestly. I would have thought there were ten year olds leaving comments if this weren't a site for ADULTS. Chill out it ain't that deep yo.

And at least I tried

Before you go typing behind a computer screen like a fake gangster, check yourdelf. Half of you are either anonymous or have not one story.

KEEP IT COMING!!

Loved the story!! Would LOVE to read more chapters of "Daddy's Slave"!! It's OK to make mistakes. Regardless of what some say or think--EVERYBODY makes them!!!
The trick is to learn from the ones you make & do your best not to repeat them; but to improve instead!! You have a great deal of potential to be a good writer!

Write More Please

I love the story. Please write another one. And don't listen to the haters. So what about a few spelling/grammer errors? It wasn't hard to figure it out. It really was a great story, one of the best I've read.7