A Present

Top notch!

Has Potential

This seems to be more of a side story for a set of characters in a larger plot... It's also a bit mis-categorized. Though one of the tags is "mocha skinned girl," the story includes a de-identified, horny woman, and a man with pale skin and blue eyes. She could have been anyone. There were many missed opportunities to include those small details that drive home the idea of a hot interracial relationship. Right now, it's just an "erotic coupling." If you're going for the moment-in-time type of story, you can still achieve it without drawing things on too long. Maybe she is watching television after a long, frustrating day at the office, and as she flips through the channels, "he" seeps into her thoughts, causing an aching heat to develop between her satiny mocha thighs--one that cannot be ignored, despite her wish to learn the outcome of whatever interesting show she'd settled on (insert a show that is a clue to your character's personality). She slips into her bedroom--or down on the couch, and things are just starting to get good, when he interrupts and makes things better... Just a thought, because I know that there is a loyal following of the bw/wm interracial story on this site (I include myself here), and we're always looking for another fix. Feed the fire--you're good. I look forward to more.