Delivery Surprise

Sorry, other than the idea I did not enjoy the read. The story writing technique left much to be desired and it read more like a report than a piece of erotica.

Kinda lacking

Good story line. Writing needs some work.

A different tip

Very hot, thanks for sharing

Nice idea, but

Story was distracting almost right away. It took the rhythm of the story away. You might want to either re-read your stories or get an editor before you submit. How do you, "than she undid her jeans showing matching white panties letting them fall to the floor also as she stepped out of them and came closer. She stood in front of me hooked her fingers into her pants and slipped them off revealing a neatly shaved pussy."?

First, it's 'then' she undid her jeans.
Second, How does one step out of her jeans, walk closer, and then hook her fingers into the pants that she just walked away from?