I'm not sure where you're taking this story, but I'm on board so far. The plot is fairly dry to this point: man meets woman, man fucks woman. There are many interesting directions you could take that plot, though. I wish you had given some hint of that direction before ending the chapter.
A few technicalities:
-- The change in perspectives from him to her was jarring. Even by separating that change with "***", it was still too drastic of a switch in the narrative because both narrators were speaking in the first person.
-- She mentions twice that she's never had a vaginal orgasm. And this married woman with three kids has never had sex with her on top? Or had multiple orgasms? It seems a little implausible without any explanation.
-- The individual limit on campaign contributions is $2,600. A $500,000 contribution would have to be explained in some way (like a SuperPAC or funneled through some illegal channel.)
this is a really magical story. not only does the woman have her first vaginal orgasm twice, she also seems to live in his hotel room, where she has her marital bedroom and a spare bedroom to fuck her lover in. truly amazing, dear writer. do you even read your own story while writing it?
...why 'don a condom' the second time around when you didn't bother to use one the first time?
by
Anonymous03/05/15
Bend over America
No surprises here, we're all used to Democrats fucking the American people!!
by
Anonymous03/05/15
Please get an editor.
You need some serious help with your structure and someone to proof read your work. Did you just write this down and post it? Too many major mistakes to be called a "story". Unreadable drivel. And the end to another dismal day in the Loving Wives section.
by
Anonymous03/05/15
re: anonymous-bend over America
Better have another look fellow, who's really fucking America. I'd say the party of No is doing a pretty good job of it. I thought this was an erotic site, is it turning into a political forum?
by
Anonymous03/05/15
No is better than killing our kids future by giving away everything to
people who don't even belong here. You're a brain dead asshole
by
Anonymous03/05/15
Reposting your own story?
Why are you reposting your own story from 2 years ago?
You never shit where you sleep: even dogs know that.
The bagmen do NOT fuck the donors or their wives because one jealous husband can ruin their career. You want to see donations dry up? Get caught fucking their spouse.
Was this written by a Republican? I think so...he has chosen a single man that fucked all the cheating wives of Democratic Politics...Not even one wasn't cheating...The line that she used is so old, so used that is full of holes!!!! As is stupid the other wife offering 500.000,00 for one fuck!!! He would have accept only 500,00!!! I hope this story ends with him dead in some dark street, with his cock in the mouth....It's the only way to this story be funny!!! 1*
Wow! The anonny a few posts ago made a very astute observation. This author posted the same exact story -- it appears word for word -- less than two years ago. Why would he republish the same story?
I have a theory. Maybe the author wanted to test just how broken the Loving Wives rating system has become, and what a toxic and hostile environment the comments section has become.
If that was the goal, I can't thank this author enough for illustrating a brilliant point. This same exact story earned a rating over four stars less than two years ago. Today, it's barely a three star story. Less than two years ago, this same story generated only four comments -- all positive and encouraging. Today..,well, just have a look for yourself.
I'd say the reader of today is just more aware of the slime of yesterday, who gave all these cuckie stories a high mark. Not so today. Reality sucks doesn't it?
Nothing broken about the system, it just takes better erotica to please today's crowd. I'm one of those that don't please easily. 1* for trash.
by
Anonymous03/06/15
The inside view of a high rolling stud in the dark shadows of dangerous infidelity
always makes intriguing reading! Good one liners and slick action. Thanks for writing and entertaining. 4*
English
Okay
I'm not sure where you're taking this story, but I'm on board so far. The plot is fairly dry to this point: man meets woman, man fucks woman. There are many interesting directions you could take that plot, though. I wish you had given some hint of that direction before ending the chapter.
A few technicalities:
-- The change in perspectives from him to her was jarring. Even by separating that change with "***", it was still too drastic of a switch in the narrative because both narrators were speaking in the first person.
-- She mentions twice that she's never had a vaginal orgasm. And this married woman with three kids has never had sex with her on top? Or had multiple orgasms? It seems a little implausible without any explanation.
-- The individual limit on campaign contributions is $2,600. A $500,000 contribution would have to be explained in some way (like a SuperPAC or funneled through some illegal channel.)
Three Little Kids
Any chance you could accept your responsibilities?
magic
this is a really magical story. not only does the woman have her first vaginal orgasm twice, she also seems to live in his hotel room, where she has her marital bedroom and a spare bedroom to fuck her lover in. truly amazing, dear writer. do you even read your own story while writing it?
another interesting question...
...why 'don a condom' the second time around when you didn't bother to use one the first time?
Bend over America
No surprises here, we're all used to Democrats fucking the American people!!
Please get an editor.
You need some serious help with your structure and someone to proof read your work. Did you just write this down and post it? Too many major mistakes to be called a "story". Unreadable drivel. And the end to another dismal day in the Loving Wives section.
re: anonymous-bend over America
Better have another look fellow, who's really fucking America. I'd say the party of No is doing a pretty good job of it. I thought this was an erotic site, is it turning into a political forum?
No is better than killing our kids future by giving away everything to
people who don't even belong here. You're a brain dead asshole
Reposting your own story?
Why are you reposting your own story from 2 years ago?
http://www.literotica.com/s/ill-drop-my-pant ies-for-u
http://www.literotica.com/s/ill-drop-my-p anties-for-u-ch-02
http://www.literotica.com/s/ill-d rop-my-panties-for-u-ch-03
You never shit where you sleep: even dogs know that.
The bagmen do NOT fuck the donors or their wives because one jealous husband can ruin their career. You want to see donations dry up? Get caught fucking their spouse.
Another shitty day for loving wife
1*
Was this written by a Republican?
Was this written by a Republican? I think so...he has chosen a single man that fucked all the cheating wives of Democratic Politics...Not even one wasn't cheating...The line that she used is so old, so used that is full of holes!!!! As is stupid the other wife offering 500.000,00 for one fuck!!! He would have accept only 500,00!!! I hope this story ends with him dead in some dark street, with his cock in the mouth....It's the only way to this story be funny!!! 1*
Re. Reposting the same story
Wow! The anonny a few posts ago made a very astute observation. This author posted the same exact story -- it appears word for word -- less than two years ago. Why would he republish the same story?
I have a theory. Maybe the author wanted to test just how broken the Loving Wives rating system has become, and what a toxic and hostile environment the comments section has become.
If that was the goal, I can't thank this author enough for illustrating a brilliant point. This same exact story earned a rating over four stars less than two years ago. Today, it's barely a three star story. Less than two years ago, this same story generated only four comments -- all positive and encouraging. Today..,well, just have a look for yourself.
What an interesting and illuminating experiment.
Good Read****
Thanks for sharing.
well swingerjoe
I'd say the reader of today is just more aware of the slime of yesterday, who gave all these cuckie stories a high mark. Not so today. Reality sucks doesn't it?
Nothing broken about the system, it just takes better erotica to please today's crowd. I'm one of those that don't please easily. 1* for trash.
The inside view of a high rolling stud in the dark shadows of dangerous infidelity
always makes intriguing reading! Good one liners and slick action. Thanks for writing and entertaining. 4*
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