The Corner

Classy woman, your wife.....

.....I bet she has more clients than friends. And I bet she's working on the side and not telling you about her new obsession with fucking. Good thing, too. She got arrested and Dame had to go bail her out. He was so mad, he made her fuck every man in the billiards club down on 22nd. She has to get checked weekly for STDs and you never get to fuck her anymore, 'cause she's too fucked out or had a vag tear and can't fuck for two weeks. As soon as she's able, she's back out on the streets for Dame.
But why would you want to fuck her anymore, anyway? Two abortions and it looks like she'll never have kids....so your family line dies with you, unless you take up with her best and much hotter friend. When she get preggers with your baby, you move out and move on. You don't divorce wifey, 'cause her entertainment still provides good income.
Just YUK!

Really? So she does all the work, risks STD's and just gives the money away?

About as erotic as watching paint dry.

Realy?

1* for this husband!!!! One sad and no morals human being...Worst than an animal...

Sorry you wasted your time, and mine.

So we are supposed its think its exciting and arousing to have a wife turn into a whore? And the husband likes it? You must be an imbecile to think such shit is interesting.

But Ronnie will like it.

stories of the mentally ill arent erotic

and this is about as mentally ill as it comes

comments by assholes like annony

are boring and pathetic! gave you a 5

Hmm, lucky husband lucky wife

Delicious

Another silly story about a wife that wants to be a slut

And at 5'6" and 200 lbs there is no way she "wears it well". She's a fat toad. I'm surprised any of the men wanted anything to do, but some guys will screw anything that moves and some guys don't care if it's moving. This was just a nasty story. Not cleverly told and both the husband and the wife were really unlikeable characters which made for a story that wasn't entertaining to read. And because Bonnie liked it you KNEW it had to be bad. 1 star for bad storyline and horrible dialogue.

bonnietaylor2 is a whore.

Like this crappy story, no class.

***

Sorry, 5689. I always like to encourage new writers, so here goes. Your writing craft isn't too bad but better proofreading would help. Pretty sure the personal pronoun I is always upper case. You do have a better than average story telling knack, for a first timer, BUT the story you chose to tell leaves a lot to be desired. The first requirement on this site should be erotic. Do you think anyone found anything erotic about a wife stupid enough to turn tricks and give all her dough to a pimp? And what kind of husband do you envision getting turned on by that?

Suggestion--review the LW stories for those with 3.8 to 4+ ratings, study them and compare your story to those. What's different--how could you rewrite yours for a better score? Above all, don't take this criticism as personal. I like to write and I expect you do too. If you want to ask questions or personally tell me to mind my own damn business feel free. You can contact by my bio page. GOOD LUCK!

Horrible story about stupid people

Gave it a 1

Anything that idiot bonnietaylor2 approves, is most likely to be trash. 1* to offset her meaningless and worthless score.

Plenty for everyone

At 200 pounds there's plenty for everyone.