Game Of Love Ch. 01

*****

Promising start.

Five.

Great Start !!!

I can't wait to see what happens next.... Please don't wait to long for an update !!!

Great start! Please continue as quick as you can and maybe longer chapters please?

Wow

This is an awesome start. Can't wait for more.

she needs new friends.out of 4 guys the all had issues that her FRIENDS thought were ok.from bad hygiene to mommy issues then the last 2 were total assholes that thought they were gods gift to their friend.micah should have known if his guy friend was into black women or not before he sent him to meet her.or if he had a problem with curvy women.most men dont want to date a woman that looks like she could start for an nfl team,but we dont mind a few curves,i prefer curves over a woman who eats a raisin then has to throw it up 5 minutes later, i just dont want to be a missing person if she rolls over in bed either.

Awesome sauce! !

Melanie is my shero!

Good start. Meloldi's description of her body size and height sounds just like a relative I have. Similar down to the size 5 feet. I definitely can picture what she looks like.

I'm confused about the seatbelt. She forgot to put it on after storming out the restaurant but the guy that saved her took it off her?

Since when has the Kardashians have the blueprint on large behinds? Nothing against the author but I want to bang my head against a wall every time I hear or read that large behinds are like " Kardashian sized".

The stranger that saved Melody might end up being the person she has been waiting for. I hope he isn't married or anything.

great start, please keep it going

love the story please update soon

Great way to start a story keep it up

Great story so far but...

Her friends are shitty.

Great start of the story...

buttt... with FRIENDS like that, who needs enemies?!

Keep it going!

Can't wait to read the next chapter! And Melodi sounds beautiful, Ben is an idiot.

Sorry, but when I am reading it is the details that can totally destroy the moment

A miracle of mechanical technology saved her life.

"I started the car up and backed out of my parking space, not bothering to put on my seatbelt as I navigated my way through the mall parking lot."
and yet, only moments later:
" My mystery savior reached over my lap, gently unbuckling me from my seatbelt."

shattering the moment, leaving my mind wondering what else is f*+#@ed up?

Get over yourself rightbank, if you have to look for minor details like that why bother reading anything? How about YOU write a story so we can all pick it apart for the details you miss!

I enjoyed it, please continue, but I'm with everyone else, her friends are assholes and she really needs to drop them.

JensenLover

I don't look for them
I don't want them to interrupt the reading

But,

When something as jarring as that happens how does it not impact you? Why does it not reach up and grab you?

???

knit pickers..

Rightbank seriously though, I think you are being a bit dramatic.. Yes there are a few mistakes in the story but nothing so jarring that it distracts from the story.. I like it.. Could do with some editing but overall a good story.. Hope you continue, and maybe get an editor or a friend to read it over before submitting.. But SUBMIT IT YOU MUST.. Pretty please :)

I sure enjoyed it! :)

I love how you took the time to develop the backstory to Melodi's woeful dates, although I must confess I was hoping for a page 2 or 3! Regardless, it was riveting and I love her fire. I hope the mystery man is up for it and we'll see a longer installment for Ch. 2. :)

I'm in love

Melodi is kick-ass:)

Great story

This is one great story. I definitely liked the plot and character development. It was spot on! I thought portraying Melodi as a strong, successful, independent woman was fantastic. She definitely is not submissive nor a doormat. I can't wait for the next chapter. Keep writing.