I did not like this story. Starting off, you had many poor grammer mistakes, and several parts that were just confusing...
The ending seemed to be a letdown. First you say that the person finally gave up to the torture, and that her friend died, but then that her friend only recieved a low voltage charge?
This story was a good read. I would have liked more erotic stimulation than sick perversion, but overall the entire story I thought was well written. It was a bit too quick for me, but I liked it for the most part. Thanks for the read ~ Red
The story line had a lot of possibilities ...BUT the grammar, word usage, spelling, etc. errors were overpowering! It completely ruined the story. Writing erotica is exactly like writing anything ...you have simply got to follow the rules. There are NO substitutes, no shortcuts. Learn the language before you write.
I spent about ten seconds skipping through this--just to see if it could be as bad as the comments suggested.
Yup--should have suspected by the lamebrainity of the title: Doctors don't actually have lairs--they have surgeries, practices and offices. How about the BUTTFUCKER'S lair, or the Doctor's EXAMINATION ROOM....bah-I'm going for a shit.
Read the first paragraph of this story and you'll be horrified by the grammar: "I am walking down the street with my girlfriend, gently I reached over and gave a ass a little squeeze, "I love you," I whispered in her ear, but then suddenly I feel a sharp stab in my neck as I turn round to see I collapse to the floor Laura next to me."____________WTF?!?!?!? Skip this grammatic nightmare.
I agree with the comments regarding spelling errors and grammatical mistakes. However, I did like the story very much and would like to see additional chapters. I hope the story takes a more erotic turn instead of the overt sadism angle.
Beautiful. I wish I could experience such a thrill.
Ahh thanks this made me climax ;)
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!
orBack to Experiments in the Doctor's Lair Ch. 01
orMore submissions by dr_dave.
Edit comment orSubmit Comment
Comment posted successfully - click here to view it or write another.
Title of your comment:
Your public comment about Experiments in the Doctor's Lair Ch. 01:
Please type in the security codeYou may also listen to a recording of the characters.
Title your feedback:
Your feedback to dr_dave:
If you would like a response, enter your email address in this box:
Feedback sent successfully - click here to write another.
Login or Sign Up
All contents © Copyright 1998-2012. Literotica is a trademark. No part may be reproduced in any form without explicit written permission.
Terms Of Services|Report A Problem|Privacy
Password:Forgot your password?
Your current user avatar, all sizes:
You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.
Select new user avatar:
Upload and save
User avatar uploaded successfuly and waiting for moderation.