All Comments on 'Technically We're Estranged Ch. 04'

by BreakTheBar

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  • 20 Comments
LustKnightLustKnightover 8 years ago
Fantastic!

Going to be a long wait for the next one, but at least we'll havena new FoF to help fill the gap. ~_^

hnau0022hnau0022over 8 years ago
Keep Going

Enjoying the story, keep it up (no pun intended)

rightbankrightbankover 8 years ago
Mel's penchant for self promotion

is exceeded only by

BTB

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Can't Wait for the continuation

This is a very good story. I hope we do not have to wait to long for Ch 5. Thanks for your time and effort

WanderingLost42WanderingLost42over 8 years ago
Great series

Great series. I'll be interested to see where you take it from here. I am, however, very excited to hear you're going back to FoF

wildfunplay4everwildfunplay4everover 8 years ago
More

More please, and I think you can make each chapter a little longer. You have so much you can do to it.

OnyxShadowOnyxShadowover 8 years ago
End of story so confusing!

Between the end of the cam show and the end of the story itself apparently something happens that really upsets Steve. However, even after reading over it three times I cannot figure out what it is. For me that makes for an awkward end to an otherwise enjoyable series.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Great series.

This is easily one of my favorite series in the incest/taboo category. I also liked pushing buttons but it only held me over for so long. I hope the next chapter of TWE comes out soon the wait is killing me!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
I must agree with OnyxShadow, the end of the chapter was confusing.

I feel like you should have explained just what trust was violated. Why would Stephan be pissed/feel betrayed/outed because of PixieDust's comment?

When you look at what she said: 'Oh, and a huge thank you to OverC's and his sexy friend. You were some great inspiration.', PixieDust was vague.

She might have been referring to Stephan and his dick, (since it seems the 'regulars' already knew there was cam to cam going on), or it could have been in reference to Stephan and his gargantuan tip.

Nothing overtly was said about OverC's having someone with him while he cam'd, and even if she had said, 'Thanks to OverC's and the brunette babe for inspiring us with a hot mutual masturbation show on cam to cam while we were fucking.' So what? Nobody knows who he is, how is he violated or exposed? It would have just made him more of a stud in their eyes, (he makes huge tips to the cam babe and gets to virtu-bang her, PLUS he has a hot babe with him while he's doing it. None of the other 4000 cam pervs have a hot babe with them.)

It feels like you took a shortcut to create some emotional tension and, to me, it fell short.

For readers to become involved in your character's emotions, you have to tell them what the emotions are, and why the character has them.

You didn't set it up beforehand, you failed to do it at the time, and now there's no investment, pro or con, in your protangonist's hissy fit. It seems artificial and contrived for him to be emotional. (I use emotional intentionally because I don't even know what emotion he's feeling.)

It seems to me I wrote similar feedback to you about FoF, but I might be mistaken.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Best series I have read

So far you have nailed this serious! I have read them one by one as they came out but the wait for chapter 5 is killing me!

Hale1Hale1over 8 years ago
Re: Onyxshadow and confusion

I have to agree in part, because I needed to reread as well, but some people have very different triggers so I can accept that. It's a great story and the conflict was needed to push things along. You set the stage for what to me was a strange reaction to a simple comment by his hyper-sensitvity over the photo exchange.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
On the reaction....

If you remember where he started,no buisness over air and no social media what so ever due to what he does for a living.

Then the reaction isnt unexplainable...i think.

To BreakTheBar: sizzling hot! Keep it coming :)

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
More!

Please add another series. This series is great! Actually the first thing I search for when I get on. Don't forget about this!

BreakTheBarBreakTheBarover 8 years agoAuthor
Sneaky Update

Hello all who have been watching this series. I made a promise earlier in the year that I would be prioritizing and FoF update before writing the rest of TWE.

Well, FoF 7 just went into editing, my follow up to Pushing Buttons is next in queue (also already written), and then I will be releasing the final three chapters of TWE (Chapter 5 is also already written!)

To those having some issues with Stephan's outburst, all I can say is it wasn't meant to be the stretched out cliffhanger it turned out to be.

~Break.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Amazing

Enjoyed it a ton, can't wait for you to post part 5. (No seriously, do it now!)

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
I'm really enjoying

Great storyline. Thanks.

T Eastern seaboard

LUSTYWHEELSLUSTYWHEELSalmost 8 years ago
Fantastic!

I love that this has the cam girls as today is so common but no-one seems to talk about it. I for one say u go girls, celebrate your youth, beauty and sexuality. I would if I were u ;)

I hope steve tells his cousin who he is , he should just call her as she deserves that much. Thank you breakthebar I love every word

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 4 years ago
Wonderful writing

Aside from the fact that this story continues to be way hot, your writing is excellent. I'm in awe of your ability to do the whole Joey Rocks confrontation *and* its aftermath phone call in under 1250 words.

Two pages for review, that scene, the cam show, and *its* aftermath -- and the chapter doesn't feel underdone at all; it feels just right to me.

Thanks!

MarkT63MarkT63over 2 years ago

BANG BELLA PLEASE!!!!

JodailyJodaily4 months ago

Ohh yesss! Bringing Bella into the mix, hot hot hot. Totally relate with Stephan blasting the monitor. I've sprayed my keyboard a time or three. Awesome jerk off story!! 👌💦💦💦💦💦

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