All Comments on 'The Perfect Pieces Ch. 06'

I've been waiting all day for this to drop and boy was it worth it!

Can't wait for tomorrow.

C

Feels like snippets...need more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe this is too intense to post as a whole. The imagery is wonderful: "fallen in love with broken glass", "shoulders lost all their bones". Very different from your last story but equally as good. You make it very difficult to pick just one of your stories as a favourite.

well done

Keep going please

Another perfect romance. Neatly plotted, nicely developed, attractive characters, and we know it will end well. Right? Right??

Well, it's a damn good thing I like onions! Especially saute'd with mushrooms and dripping over a finely grilled steak!

The chapter lengths used here MUST have been an experiment. I would say that chpts 1-5 could have easily been fit together as one whole. And THIS chapter IS a natural start for the next part of the arc. But even in fits and starts, since you post faithfully, we can still manage to keep track of what is going on. But I really find myself agreeing that the chapters should be longer.....

I am eager to keep going. But since HIS background has just become one of the "perfect pieces", now my biggest fear is the author flirting too much with the inevitable cheese factor. Friends and favors called in, will it REALLY be a flawless vicory, simply executed with lazer beam precision? You excell in projecting flaws in your heros, and here is no different. But I can't imagine this going down without ANY risk. And despite what has been a fairytale romance so far, there needs to be some of the growing pains associated with this process. They will both have to lose part of them selves so that they can more fully learn to regrow, but then even more bound to eachother. I guess, it just seems unreal to go into a gunfight without at least getting clipped once in the arm.

However, IF you have taken the time to reveal just HOW he (and his friends) can overcome the odds, and take out the cartell, and it pivots on the little chance of good luck, and they ALL know how lucky they were to have pulled it off....then maybe this "good guys nail the bad guys" episode WILL be the proper and satisfying payoff you envisioned for this story.

I have concerns , but no fears. Every story of yours that I have read has more than fullfilled its promise. I so hope this one will remain up to your previous high standards.

And NOW, as things get more interesting, I hope you help us to maintain the intensity that rescuing pretty girls from evil drug dealers should project. No, I won't sit here biting my nails, but I AM eagerly awaiting the next!

Thanks again, DreamCloud...for doing what you do so well!

The tangled web you have carefully woven is now being gradually untangled--with big new complications, of course!--by your talented hand. Excellent! I eagerly look each morning to see if the next chapter has posted. Ch. 7 is anxiously anticipated, as we look to find out more of this intriguing story. You have created lead characters so very realistic and so human, frail and layered and strong all at the same time. And, they are people who we now care about very much. This is a characteristic of a superb writer! Thank you, and bring on the rest of the story!

Worst spot to end it! Damn cliffhanger! Luckily, we don't have to wait long for the next chapter.

Keep on writing, you're very talented.

There are certain analogies to this story in Loving Wives, but I will accept him as

an ex-superman....

Another story with a far-fetched plot and far too many coincidences. I was concerned in the previous chapter when it was alluded that we might not know everything about Mark's past, and this chapter just confirmed my fears.

I suppose I can understand dabbling in different styles of storytelling and I very much enjoyed most of your output, but these last few stories have been rather silly. The medieval story, the sperm donor story, the assassin story and now this one; while each of them are very well written, they also contain plot elements or contrivances that don't sit right with me. They're a little too pulpy or soap operatic for my tastes. One particular detail that puzzles me is how Amber/Samantha was able to hitchhike cross-country with (I presume) her face plastered everywhere and only one person has recognized her.

It also doesn't help when the story is split up into so many one-page chapters. I'm not sure how many would agree with me, but I much prefer reading it all in a single document (much like how StoriesOnline formats its submissions).

All that said, the quality is still top-notch and easily among the best of this site. Maybe my complaints are more of a nitpick than anything, as I am still looking forward to where this story goes. It's just not my favorite of yours.

the entire focus of the story took a dramatic change.

Total game changer. Loving it.

Now you really have me hooked. That's what I love about your stories, pure entertainment! I watch the news to stay informed of current events in the world and in my own neighborhood so I can be prepared. I watch movies and read stories to be entertained. It sure beats reading about a hospital that was bombed, killing doctors, patients and children or a gunman killing students on another college campus. I guess it's a matter of preference. For me, I think there's been too much realism, lately that involves innocent people dying for no reason. At least when people die in your stories or in the movies it's usually for a good cause or they deserved it and I can take comfort in knowing that it isn't real. So, Thank you for the entertainment and this small break from reality.

Things are starting heat up now. Damn but you are good! Now we get to the inevitable bad part.

..... not to steal a phrase. I am beginning to suspect that RB1947 and this reader have the same grand appreciation for this excellent story.

I’ve been trying for 37 years to explain to my wife the power she had, but didn’t know how to use.

The sentence about babies and argumentative men nailed it.

Thank you for understanding.

Silencedsnow & RB1947 have both nailed it. Now we wait and see. Helluva tale. LP

And I'm out.

but it's not because the story is poorly written. On the contrary, I think this is a very well written story. I just don't want to dedicate myself to a story that needs this cop and robber plotline. I knew she was in trouble. A drug dealer would have been fine, but a highly placed Cartel leader is pushing it for me.

I will read other things from this auther because I love the writing style and skill.

Ooh, aah missus, trouble in paradise.

Dang, more suspense...thank you.

Now the interest picks up. It was all vanilla so far. Now the chocolate and the chips are falling in place. To the next chapter...

Pretty boring until this chapter. Thanks! Keeps me reading.