...But don't be in such a hurry. Should've made this introduction twice as long. Develop your characters. Enjoy the first moments of the first day. It's a great idea for a story. I'll be waiting to see where you take them.
Seems an interesting story-line. As previously muted, take a bit of time over situations and develop characters. The odd twist helps as well.
I assume you are proof-reading yourself as there are a few minor typos.
Looking forward to the next instalment.
The fact that the 'owners' aren't lecherous, and at least seem sincere in their experiment, lends the story a fun tone that I appreciated. I agree that this intro could have been a bit longer with a bit more teasing, but overall a great first posting.
I read the entire story, it held my interest not like most submissions.. More chapters would be nice. I like details.. Such as color of Miranda's spiked heels.. Lipstick, fingernails, etc.
Since I have a smoking fetish and the island abandons taboos, I would like to have some of the island sluts smoke cigarettes.. Keep the story cumming..
Sorry thats what I thought of, lots of sex, lots of fun, hmmm. These days I was thinking what a mess, watch where you walk and sit, I guess. I'm to old for this stuff.
Thanks, this is what fantasy island should of been.
English
Off to a great start...
...But don't be in such a hurry. Should've made this introduction twice as long. Develop your characters. Enjoy the first moments of the first day. It's a great idea for a story. I'll be waiting to see where you take them.
Who is really running this Island Paradise
Robert or Miranda. It might be his money but the little head is doing all the thinking at this point.
More time for the next day.
Seems an interesting story-line. As previously muted, take a bit of time over situations and develop characters. The odd twist helps as well.
I assume you are proof-reading yourself as there are a few minor typos.
Looking forward to the next instalment.
Fun and interesting
The fact that the 'owners' aren't lecherous, and at least seem sincere in their experiment, lends the story a fun tone that I appreciated. I agree that this intro could have been a bit longer with a bit more teasing, but overall a great first posting.
More Chapters.. More Details..
I read the entire story, it held my interest not like most submissions.. More chapters would be nice. I like details.. Such as color of Miranda's spiked heels.. Lipstick, fingernails, etc.
Since I have a smoking fetish and the island abandons taboos, I would like to have some of the island sluts smoke cigarettes.. Keep the story cumming..
The plane.
Sorry thats what I thought of, lots of sex, lots of fun, hmmm. These days I was thinking what a mess, watch where you walk and sit, I guess. I'm to old for this stuff.
Thanks, this is what fantasy island should of been.
Right on, write on!
Made me wet..nice mystery unfolding.
More please
This sounds like the ultimate horndog fantasy land. Should make for some interesting following chapters. Write on as the other commenter said.
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