great action!! god description some nice tension with the possibility of being discovered some potential for more stories with co-workers and others which i look forward to
Wow they combination of the hot tit action and the idea of right in the office is mind blowing.
by
Anonymous12/16/03
797Sickening Trash
We both agree that Sharron in nothing more than a cum slut and Jonny is a Male Slut. Both need to be punished for doing what they did at work. Why is it that male sluts are obsessed with large breasts. It sounds like Sharron likes her titties played with and she loves sucking a males penis like a common whore. This is disgusting and both of them should be fired immediately and their co-workers should be informed why they are being fired. We hope this is the first and last of such a story. It is humiliating for everyone. Next time, have someone edit your writing.
Laura & Lisa, the bi sisters, NO VOTE FOR TRASH
Your story was perfect. I liked it for what it was fantasy and if some people can't accept that tough luck for them. Some people like some stories and dislike others. But to each there own.
Your story is good, but it has to be said that you start off with a semi-serious feel, but then the characters start talking and it just seems so silly.
I think your story doesn't really know if its in melodrama type zone, or a serious "porn story". Lets face it; this is a long way from erotica. ITs porn. And we love it. But the character's speech is just way too unrealistic. I mean the characters just seem as though they are TOO sex-crazed.
?Speaking of tits, yours are truly magnificent? - NO! No one would say that! Even after having thier cock sucked off! (Just my opinion)
?Of course I have Jonny. I absolutely love getting my titties fucked. In fact, I just had them fucked last night by my neighbour, while his wife watched.?
?You?re fucking kidding me. That is so hot.? - Oh puh-lease! Now that just sounds silly! I'm sorry.
Do you see what I mean? It just sounds completly unrealistic. I think if you really want the characters to be so sex-crazed and so unrealistic, you should make the story a bit more humouros - A bit more satire kinda thing.
Well, its all up to you. People seem to like the stories in any case. I sure do, even though some of the lines are more "corny" then a porn film. :)
Hey again. I may not have been that descriptive last time - I was more rambly! What I mean is that the story should have ups and downs. Have you ever heard of Todorov's Stages? They're stages of narrative that *should* be followed. I think some web site should explain it better.
English
Good Start to a Series
great action!! god description some nice tension with the possibility of being discovered some potential for more stories with co-workers and others which i look forward to
Nice rack baby
Now those are some nice titties, great mouth too by the sounds!
Between the breasts is best!
I've always loved that type of sex. I wish it was better for the girl. You just need to know how to compensate for it.
Hot start.
Wow they combination of the hot tit action and the idea of right in the office is mind blowing.
797Sickening Trash
We both agree that Sharron in nothing more than a cum slut and Jonny is a Male Slut. Both need to be punished for doing what they did at work. Why is it that male sluts are obsessed with large breasts. It sounds like Sharron likes her titties played with and she loves sucking a males penis like a common whore. This is disgusting and both of them should be fired immediately and their co-workers should be informed why they are being fired. We hope this is the first and last of such a story. It is humiliating for everyone. Next time, have someone edit your writing.
Laura & Lisa, the bi sisters, NO VOTE FOR TRASH
I loved It
Your story was perfect. I liked it for what it was fantasy and if some people can't accept that tough luck for them. Some people like some stories and dislike others. But to each there own.
Nice, but a bit too unrealistic.
Hey,
Your story is good, but it has to be said that you start off with a semi-serious feel, but then the characters start talking and it just seems so silly.
I think your story doesn't really know if its in melodrama type zone, or a serious "porn story". Lets face it; this is a long way from erotica. ITs porn. And we love it. But the character's speech is just way too unrealistic. I mean the characters just seem as though they are TOO sex-crazed.
?Speaking of tits, yours are truly magnificent? - NO! No one would say that! Even after having thier cock sucked off! (Just my opinion)
?Of course I have Jonny. I absolutely love getting my titties fucked. In fact, I just had them fucked last night by my neighbour, while his wife watched.?
?You?re fucking kidding me. That is so hot.? - Oh puh-lease! Now that just sounds silly! I'm sorry.
Do you see what I mean? It just sounds completly unrealistic. I think if you really want the characters to be so sex-crazed and so unrealistic, you should make the story a bit more humouros - A bit more satire kinda thing.
Well, its all up to you. People seem to like the stories in any case. I sure do, even though some of the lines are more "corny" then a porn film. :)
Bye bye.
A bit more description
Hey again. I may not have been that descriptive last time - I was more rambly! What I mean is that the story should have ups and downs. Have you ever heard of Todorov's Stages? They're stages of narrative that *should* be followed. I think some web site should explain it better.
But apart from that your ideas are great. :)
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