Rhapsody in Blue

A beautiful, flawed gem.

This was a lovely read, and i was excited to see someone try a period piece. But there were a lot of mistakes, some small ("pheromone" was not coined until the late 1950's) and some large (lots of awkward phrasing and s ton of missing commas). If you can find someone to maybe give your stories a quick looking over after your first draft, the diamond in the rough can easily become a finely cut and polished beauty.

Thank you for the input it is very much appreciated. This is in fact my first prose piece ever published and as non English native it is crucial for me to get the right feedback about how I use words and structure it as a whole. I will see about getting the next pieces edited by native eyes.

*bows