Not enough information on what's going on to fully understand........
There is simply too much going on that is not in the story to let me fully understand what is happening in this story. Did he rape her? Did his brother? Is he married to her, or is his brother? Or maybe one of them was, but not now? This slice of life also comes across as a slice out of a story. There just needs to be some context to fit this into to let the reader understand what's going on. If that was there then this bit would be a well written highly emotional and effective focal point, but as it stands it just leaves me confused.
English
Not at all romantic, post your 'stories' where they belong, maybe scifi since... "From her heaving chests". How can you have 2 chests?
Thoroughly enjoyable (though an editor is needed). More would be appreciated!
Bros before Hoes.
Not enough information on what's going on to fully understand........
There is simply too much going on that is not in the story to let me fully understand what is happening in this story. Did he rape her? Did his brother? Is he married to her, or is his brother? Or maybe one of them was, but not now? This slice of life also comes across as a slice out of a story. There just needs to be some context to fit this into to let the reader understand what's going on. If that was there then this bit would be a well written highly emotional and effective focal point, but as it stands it just leaves me confused.
Very nice.
The reader is pushed into filling in the blanks with imagination! Excellent!
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