Ambulance Nurse

OK, let's start ...

... with the very first sentence - "There was a crunch as a the driver slammed the vehicle into gear ..." - 'as a the'??
So you couldn't even be bothered to proof read the first sentence?
And you expect people to attempt to read it??

You know what I read it in the story and when dear annony wrote it, and I missed it both time.

So fuck the spelling and grammar and fuck dear annony! I gave you a 5 for a good a story!! Man the asshole of Lit is at it again, right you are dear annony, you are an asshole

First comment

Sorry anonymous. I admit that English isn't my first language, so I'll also have to admit that the English might be a tad broken at times. However, I don't actually know what is grammatically incorrect with that sentence, so do feel free to point that out. Might help with future stories and then you'd have a bit less to complain about. :)

Oh crap, he's right!

And now that I do see the extra "a" in there I feel like an idiot. Should've noticed that, but I easily get blind of my own work since I read and re-read these things like five times.

Foregoing the grammar mistakes

This just wasn't interesting or entertaining to read. End of story. No stars.

Aside from a few minor editing issues, the writing was pretty good. The descriptions were very vivid. I found the story itself a little disturbing. Maybe that was the goal?

Disturbing

Shouldn't this be in horror? I was not expecting the way that went and am more disturbed than turned on.

re: TippingTheScales

Wasn't sure if this should be classified as horror, had to choose some category. Went with the "fear" tag instead and found out that "death" is a disallowed tag altogether, so...