Anime Convention Harem Ch. 03

Another great short

Enjoying how the story is progressing. Keep them coming.

Just a personal nit-picky thing, suggestions

If you're going to have such a long build up please give notice of it at the start of the story. logically he's had a bad break up and won't be a sex fiend later that day, but he has a magical harem bracelet... I love the nerd setting and flow so far.

Suggestion: keep the magic of the charm a mystery but consistent, I have read a few similar stories that made the "x factor" as unpredictable as can be and was a fun read until the writer ran out of ideas and the story was cut short.

Suggestion: if you haven't already - picture how/where you want this story to end and make a rough draft for the final installment when you get the chance. Any twists and turns can be made but a story without an ending is terrible when a reader wants closure.

I'm done with this series

Three chapters with no sex? This is the wrong place to post this story. This is LitEROTICA, not LitNERDVANA. Someone mentioned in Ch. 2's comments that this story is on another site. I say leave it there.

Writer Tease!!!!

Nice SLOOOOW Start! Lots of Potential! At Least 39 More Chapters?

Well I like the buildup

I don't know what's with people's attention span here. There are plenty of stories on literotica that have a long slow buildup, but I guess I can't think of any in the mind control section. Maybe it's just a different audience in this section, but the buildup really is nice. Keep it up.

Long build up.

The long build up is fine, but if you want to keep readers you need to post all of the build up on one go. Your building it up, but you are stretching this out over days. Hope the excitement comes soon before interest fades.

guess i should have expected that

damn...even the author's comments are way too long and boring

The pacing is perfectly fine in my view.

I have no problems with how you've developed things so far. Most stories do get to the action sooner, but I'm fine with this buildup - I think it suits the story. Great work, keep it up.

Loving the story so far, the only real problem is.... there isn't enough of it! I keep coming back in hopes that more will be waiting, only to be disappointed.

You mentioned that you'd done many rewrites, which suggests to me that you've finished the whole story and are submitting it a piece at a time. The problem with that though, is that it serves to highlight the lack of action as much as the girl being introduced.

I'd recommend that you upload the whole story as a single piece (or at least up until the fun really starts), and let sub-headings within the text separate each girl's episode. That should address the lack of audiences'... satisfaction, while still preserving the harem anime motif you're having such fun emulating.

As it is, "Anime Convention Harem" feels more like echi than hentai. That's cool for a while, but we need to know the good stuff is on its way, too. Even if it doesn't come until the 9th page of an 11-page literotica entry, it will still be enough.

Please don't make us wait too long, though!

Abandon all hope ye who enter

I just read the next two chapters on MCstories and its the same .... Not much action but the developing story line is pretty good

Good story, new characters being introduced, one per chapter....

....and your character development, while too deep for some, is spot on!
Looking forward to meeting the rest of the harem....and all that follows.
The best train rides are the long ones, where you can sit back, relax, and enjoy the views and the company.
Who said jets were better?

On my second read through of the series and felt the need to point out to those complaining about the 'lack of sex', we were given fair warning at the start of chapter 1.

No sense bashing the author's story because you don't like the pacing. You were warned. If it isn't your thing, fine. Move on. Rating this down or trashing it/the author in the comments out of spite is juvenile. It is a very well written story, and readers who are patient will likely find that the attention to details, dialogue, and overall development pays off massively at the end.

To FortySixtyFour, Thank you for the story and keep up the great work!