Prodigal Daughter

Too long

Some of your sentences are way too long. The first one with 87 words, others over 50.

To. Hell with long sentences

I liked the story all the same.

Sentences are way too long, have up half way through.

Great Read*****

I love your stories and style. Grand Island and the sequel are two of my favorites. Thanks for sharing.

to you and to anonymous

Your story was well told, well written and enjoyable.

To the other 'Anonymouses' - if all you have to do is count words, instead of reading content, then I suggest you go away and play Scrabble. Or produce well written erotica of your own. If, of course, you are able to write.

Cracking story

This anonymous thoroughly enjoyed a well written story. The fact that the sentences were apparently too long is irrelevant.
I will follow advice and look out your other work.
A damn good read!

Okay, not so much

Reads like it was free writing for a college creative writing class. Just too wordy.

Depends on what you want....

I wound up loving this story! You made the backstory interesting and weaved in enough suspense about what was to come to keep me reading to the end. The only thing I would suggest is a more graphic description of the couplings, to please the "wham bam" readers.