It's All In the Cards Ch. 01

Title Error

Hey folks, hope you enjoyed the story. I'm posting a comment because somehow during submission, the title got cut off, this is Chapter 1 of at LEAST 3 chapters. I've got most of Chapter 2 written, and Chapter 3 is already storyboarded. I just didn't want anyone who read this to think the story just ends like that.

Title Error Part 2

I really shouldn't write comments at 4 in the morning. I forgot to mention, later today, I'll be re-submitting this story with the corrected title. If you bookmark it and it's gone in a couple days, that's why. The new URL might be different.

interesting

want to see where this is going

Re-submission complete

Just letting you all know that I've submitted my correction so that the title should indicate this is just Chapter 1. It says it can take a couple days to be updated.

Great!

Throughly enjoyed it!

Good stuff

No idea what the problem that anonymous fool has got. If it doesn't float your boat, just move on.

Loved this; shot my wad reading it. Trust next part is on way - the other couple need theirs...

Feedback

Yeah, expect part 2 early next week. I have gotten some feedback about the first chapter that I want to incorporate into the next, so there's a slight delay. This is literally my first attempt at writing erotica. This story is actually based loosely on a dream I had awhile back that i wrote down and now am embellishing upon.

Anyway, I'm glad those of you who've enjoyed it have spoken up to say so. I hope I don't disappoint with the next chapter. And Chapter 3, which ought to be out before Christmas, is going to be a LOT of fun. It's the same concept, but a much different execution.

Nice one

Well-written, moves along, sexy. Looking forward to the next bit!

I'm assuming your not posting a second chapter.

Yes, I am posting a second chapter, I'm sorry it's not happening as fast as I originally said it would. Real life issues always seem to get in the way, and I've re-written it twice already. I'm just not as happy with the 2nd chapter as I was with the 1st, and I don't want to post something I'm not proud of.

Good stuff

Nice sex, need more

Very well written

Really well done, I can't wait for more!

My Grandmother Calls Me "Dear"...

No one my age (23) uses the word "dear", we use words like "babe", or "boo". "Dear" is a term of endearment used by my grandparents to us kids. "Dear" is not a term used by young adults to address their significant others. The way the characters speak should reflect their age in the story line and not the age of the author writing the story.

I'm 19 and I call my girlfriend "Dear". I think it's just how you were raised. I would never be caught dead calling her "boo". She would slap the hell out of me.

Great idea.

As I read this story my first thought was, "How cool is this. Where do I get set of those cards." I love your imgination.