I'm looking forward to more - but I really don't want this story to end !
by
Anonymous12/16/15
Liking this more and more
This story just keeps getting hotter and better :-) Greatjob!
by
Anonymous12/20/15
Learn some anatomy.
The story would be more fun if you made it a little more realistic. There's no way a cock of any size hits the back wall of a uterus -- there's a little thing called the cervix in the way.
...Christy in is a real mistake to the story arc, since at that point, Jolene sounds like a real slut instead of the girl that only wants Richard. The idea of a threesome might appeal to some, but it turns me off, as it's not consistent with her wanting the 'security' of knowing she'll have Richard all to herself.
Run-ons still a problem; because of those and Christy, 4.
English
This just gets better and better !
I'm looking forward to more - but I really don't want this story to end !
Liking this more and more
This story just keeps getting hotter and better :-) Greatjob!
Learn some anatomy.
The story would be more fun if you made it a little more realistic. There's no way a cock of any size hits the back wall of a uterus -- there's a little thing called the cervix in the way.
Bringing...
...Christy in is a real mistake to the story arc, since at that point, Jolene sounds like a real slut instead of the girl that only wants Richard. The idea of a threesome might appeal to some, but it turns me off, as it's not consistent with her wanting the 'security' of knowing she'll have Richard all to herself.
Run-ons still a problem; because of those and Christy, 4.
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