All Comments on 'A Night at Millicent's'

You could remove two thirds of the first page and it wouldn't change the story at all. It's loaded with redundancies, reiterations and long, unnecessary lists. You even emphasize the reiterations: "as aforementioned", " Again, her trek to reach it was lengthy." Maybe you don't think anyone got it the first time? I don't know if the story gets better, because I gave up at the end of the first page.

I liked it. Did characters thoughts occasionly run in circles a bit, yes. Odd, since it never ever happens to people in life ;). I like how you make me happy your characters connect. Thanks for another lovely story. AQ

Hi, I just want to say that as a Brit (named Sophie funnily enough) I admire the fact that you wanted to tackle a British POV but a lot of the slang etc that Sophie uses is either incorrect, or just something no brit would actually say. Sorry if that sounds really harsh, just kinda a pet peeve of mine. No one really says mate that much (especially if they're referring to a stranger, it's just seen as not particularly polite), nor lass, unless they're from Newcastle. Also unless she's Cockney, there's no need to leave out the h in words. I'll stop there, this is porn after all and I probably sound really pedantic pointing out slang errors haha, also at the end of the day I can't really say shit bc I have a Southern kink but there you go. At the end of the day if you want to write Anglophile porn all the power to you, just don't go overboard with British stereotypes (the last names as well were very fanciful, I quite liked them actually but not v realistic haha) and ye.

Here is another decent effort from you. I wont say I loved it, but I didnt hate it either. It had just the right amount of flair to keep me reading till the end. I am a bit of a romantic at heart, but there were a few things that were a bit of a turn-off like Gabby pretending to be a cat to see if Sophie likes her. But hey, that's just me. Ofcourse, I agree with real life Sophie's comments above. Not all brits talk like that. I felt a lot of the words used were more Cockney than anything else. But then again I am not british, so dont pay any heed to me. Also, no need to pay any attention to toxic comments from the first Anonymous reader. I've been where you are and I hardly ever respond to such criticisms. All in all a pretty decent effort from your imaginary stable. I cant wait to move on to the next one. :)

Congrats on reaching a milestone in the number of stories you've written! Thank you for adding your unique style of writing to the "Lesbian Library" of Literotica. I wish you continued success and many more happy writings

So I loved the story, Sophie and Gabby are adorbs cute, and that cat bit was squee worthy. The comments not so much. I was holding off on commenting because this is going to be long and awkward for doing on a phone, but ah well, let's make do.

While I don't like having to correct a fellow Brit on the subject of our country, Sophie's comment above is really inaccurate... To the point I can narrow her background to a reasonably small selection of places.

First up the use of "mate"... That's in pretty heavy use in a lot of areas of the North East and North West, particularly if you restrict your sample to those in their teenagers and early twenties or those from a working class background. Lass, as a term, is migrated from Scotland and thus is common in a lot of places north of Brum. Considering she's supposed to be from the North East, both words would be expected.

Next the H thing. No idea where people got the idea that it was just a Cockney thing... It's normal in most of the North of England except in upper class families. "look 'ere child, it's nert t' do wit you why she's gon't ter tha shops" and so forth. Up here the ambulance takes you to the 'ospital. Wow that made a mess of my auto correct.

That leaves us with slang... As with the names, nothing jumped out as unnatural. There are a couple of oddities but they're consistent in themselves and fit with her characterisation as a well read girl from a working class... I got the impression of a farming or small village type of background. Essentially she comes across as exactly the kind of nice but quirky eccentric that our country is so well known for.

Whelp, I dun goofed... Even though I told the broken thing to post that comment with my name, the stupid comment form decided to post it anon anyway and I didn't think to double check. *sulks*

Well, if anyone around here is insane, clearly it's me... but I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell... so I'm going to make like a Gabby and maybe take a cat nap before I see about some email replies lol. At least you already have an answer to one puzzle :p

I really enjoyed it 5 stars

Here is a Comment from a English Lesbian . Take no notice of the doom mongers saying that is not how British folk speak . As with every country I imagine, it depends on where you are as to how you speak . Dropped H's are not confined to just Cockney slang as some have suggested. I recognised people who speak like that. My own accent has North east to South west overtones with a good dose of Black country thrown in ( for those not in the know Black country is a region so named because of the heavy industrialised / soot covered buildings , not race related)

Now to the actual story . I loved it . I could picture my self in that shop along with Sophie and Gabby . I also liked the cat play , thought it was cute.

I for one would love to have a lock with either of these lovely ladies or both . wink wink.

In summary Great story , loved it.

Thank you

jc

As a Londoner, my first reaction was that the adorable pretty witty Britty seemed more Dick Van Dyke than Lincolnshire. But in deference to those commenters who seem more attuned to the vagaries and varieties of English accents to be found north of Watford, I'll just be quiet and enjoy the wonderful story.

One of the occasional treats of Lit is scanning the lists of old stories and finding a real treasure---and this story is a perfect treasure filled with delights. Others have commented on the shaky use of accents and I have to agree there. I lived in Lincolnshire for several years very many moons ago and Sophie doesn't come within a hundred miles. Writing regional accents is tricky, even when you're a native of the country. Best left alone. That said, it in no way detracts from this tale which is hugely enjoyable. Power to your pen and long life and happiness to Sophie and Gabby.

Excellent story. Well written thank you.