A Bit of Fun

Automotive Anatomy 101

"His piston found her valve" Valve?? I suggest a little background info.

some of the absolute worst analogies I've ever read in an erotic story

I'm sorry but were you on something when you wrote this?
What utter garbage.
And I'm someone who tries to see the best in every story I read.
But really ... did you read it through before you submitted it?

great story

thanks, very entertaining. TK

proofread proofread proofread ...

is it Carl or Clark?

A bit of fun indeed

An enjoyable premise; wife's first time to a dinner-party with her family and getting it on with her husband during the dinner-party. I liked the fantasy of hypnotizing her so she could relax; adding the bit where she figured it out was a nice touch of realism.
By the bye, ignore haters who spew nothing of any constructive use whatsoever, and continue to work on being a better storyteller. I look forward to your next story.

2

Her husbands is much bigger? The only minds messed with were ours.

Just didn't get it

I like the premise - hypnotized for a stressful event, but I just didn't get what was happening here. Is it Carl or Clark? Is that on purpose - like she is looking at him as one guy when she is hypnotized, and a different guy when she is not, or is that just an editing issue? Also, could have had a lot more fun with her while she was under, but I don't really see what the hypnotism adds to this story.

"She reached the wires about his sex. Her sparkplug ignited."

Just. Stop. It

Way too many metaphors used in the story. And auto shop metaphors are the worst....

....beyond that, the story was very disjointed and in all, moribund.
Too bad, because I like this kind of story, but I do expect a cohesive, smooth transitional, complete story.
If this had been any choppier, I'd have abandoned it by the third paragraph.

An enjoyable read

Thanks for posting this story, I thought it flowed very well, an interesting story which was beautifuly writen.
Pete.

More sex

I just need more headboards banging the walls. I bit goofy on the auto lingo for sex. Her engines revels or something. Huh?