Poor grammar and dialogue issues aside, your story is not bad. You have promise. Read other stories and consider getting some editing help. One thing for sure…please refrain from using "Milk my penis" as erotic talk during sex. Definitely a buzz-kill when the reader is laughing out loud…***
by
Anonymous02/19/16
Another good story
Please keep writing
by
Anonymous02/19/16
not
not truly incest with step daddy more like older man younger girl yes poor grammar
does not help the story line maybe you should get an editor or even try reading your words after you write them and if they do not sound right to you, then make changes before posting. make it a different story line but if you can't then make it better grammar don't use internet spelling use proper
Thank you everyone for your comments. I do my best to make my grammar correct. I am only 18, so am not amazingly good with grammar. haha. Glad you like my stories. If anyone has a suggestion for a topic, feel free to tell me, and I'll make a story for you!
by
Anonymous02/21/16
Why not "taboo" sex with the mom's gynecologist?
Why not have "taboo" sex with the mother's gynecologist or hairdresser?
Step father/Daughter is not Incest.
Again if you are not able to go into a real mom/son or father/daughter story, why not stick to another much more PC genre?
English
Ok
Poor grammar and dialogue issues aside, your story is not bad. You have promise. Read other stories and consider getting some editing help. One thing for sure…please refrain from using "Milk my penis" as erotic talk during sex. Definitely a buzz-kill when the reader is laughing out loud…***
Another good story
Please keep writing
not
not truly incest with step daddy more like older man younger girl yes poor grammar
does not help the story line maybe you should get an editor or even try reading your words after you write them and if they do not sound right to you, then make changes before posting. make it a different story line but if you can't then make it better grammar don't use internet spelling use proper
Thanks
Thank you everyone for your comments. I do my best to make my grammar correct. I am only 18, so am not amazingly good with grammar. haha. Glad you like my stories. If anyone has a suggestion for a topic, feel free to tell me, and I'll make a story for you!
Why not "taboo" sex with the mom's gynecologist?
Why not have "taboo" sex with the mother's gynecologist or hairdresser?
Step father/Daughter is not Incest.
Again if you are not able to go into a real mom/son or father/daughter story, why not stick to another much more PC genre?
What do you mean by "if your not able to make a real father/daughter story?" I find this real...
You got me so hard right now!
Not bad for a single page!
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