This is overwritten, clichéd, pretentious crap. Cut all the flowery bull and just tell the story. It might also help to listen to how people actually talk. Your dialogue is ridiculous. Hunan beings just don't talk like that. Staining the air?
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English
Pretentious Crap
This is overwritten, clichéd, pretentious crap. Cut all the flowery bull and just tell the story.
It might also help to listen to how people actually talk. Your dialogue is ridiculous. Hunan beings just don't talk like that.
Staining the air?
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Pussy-Licker: Testing of Pauline or
More submissions by tristantrotsky.