Irene Pt. 01

Good Start****

It's different. Thanks for sharing.

Looks like a ignominious beginning to a long and bloody tale....

....while I make allowances for ESL writings, specifically because pulling off a story in a language foreign to one's upbringing is itself a very brave deed.....I cannot forgive that your post-writing edits seemed to be nonexistent.
So, try reading this out loud. If they don't sound at least similar to what you hear on TV or radio (US or UK), you're very likely missing important bits.
So write, write, edit, edit, edit, edit, edit, edit.....in this proportions, your work will benefit and your stories will make better sense.

Interesting idea...

Interesting idea for a story...Let's see where the writer will take us...It's a promising start...3* for now

Garbage

Every story today was written by a Bruce Jenner, Republican idiot, and all got 1 star.

If you knowingly marry a whore....

You deserve every pain she brings you in the future.
And you are a total dumb-ass.
I find no interest in reading about idiots.
And whats with kissing the whore after knowing where her lips had been.
Get ready to welcome stds in the future.
Keep your sick probable cuck tale to yourself..

Another sad day in LW with all stories being so shitty...

What's the old adage

This story seems like the old adage / warning a father gives his son:
There are two types of women (people) in the world; ones that you party with and ones you marry. You don't marry the ones you party with; they're not the marrying type... You know "the type you don't bring home to mother...". lol

"How we ended up with marriage is a long and interesting story as well."

I'm guessing that its going to be long for sure. But interesting? Let's see, she sells her music, but apparently gives away her body, to anyone who walks in. So we know something about her values, and her self respect. And we know that the first impression she made on her eventual husband was that she is an insatiable whore, which tells us a lot about his intelligence, and self respect.

So two people who met and acted like two dogs fucking in an alley decide to become husband and wife. What's so interesting about that? Happens every day; look at the divorce rate.

So far a 1, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt and withhold my rating. So interest me.

why marry someone you know is going to randomly fuck around on you

1* for a very grossly stupid story

No, not interested

The first part sucked the big one. Can't imagine that you'll suddenly learn to write. Don’t bother with any more.

Just a minute Mr. Anonymous

She is a slut giving it away, but are the guys any better? I think not. The judgmental attitude is funny, but honestly, going down on a slut who is in a gang bang is absolutely just as bad as the girl doing it. Can anybody claim the boy is better than the girl?
I give the anonymous commentators one star and the writer 5.

Not a bad start.

Keep em coumming.

I'm hooked

A first chapter of any story should include a "hook" to provide the readers with an incentive to continue to the following chapter. You did an excellent job setting the stage and providing that hook. I only hope that you don't let too many days pass before the next chapter is submitted, as it becomes difficult to follow the story.

An interesting start and I suppose one could find some good qualities in a woman who has sex with multiple partners on a whim. Yes, I come from an older generation and would never have met this woman, let alone married her. Still, I gave the story four stars just to offset the sabotage of some of the "anony's" who's mission in life seems to be to read stories they claim to abhor. Methinks they doth protest too much.

Bad story!

Nothing erotic about a slut being gang banged. 1*

Different way to meet your wife to be.

Could go either way from here. Will be watching for part 2.

1*

nothing more needs to be said

"Ashamed"

I would be ashamed to tell anyone I married a nasty whore like That. "0".

What a way to start your life off.

Marrying a total slut , who is into gang bangs with strangers.

There's nothing wrong with a slut, being a slut

Just because the girl, who I'll assume is single, just fucked three guys, that shows no insight into her character. She could be sweet as honey, honest as the day is long, and faithful as a pet dog. She just likes to fuck.

re: 1* nothing more needs to be said

Actually, there is more. This isn't, oh say, a prime and proper wife who suddenly tells hubby she's going out on a date. She's not changing the rules. This how they met, and he's hardly innocent since he took part in the gangbang.

Face it, some of the slams against those who criticize LW stories are dead on. You're a good example. From the evidence of your post the very concept of a wife who fucks another man is bad, regardless of the story, the circumstances, whether he's in the wrong or the right, etc. Giving a "review" like that to a cliched story may be warranted, but, face it, so far this is NOT one of the usual cliches.

Your bio says you are single, stay that way.

Cause you don't have a clue about women and marriage.

Marry that woman?

Are you drunk or are you just pulling our collective legs? Because no one would marry that whore. She'd be cheating on you before the honeymoon was over.
1 star for complete and utter drivel.

nope,

nothing here for me

Funny comments

What if the genders were reversed? If this was a guy fucking three girls at once. Would he be generally unfit for marriage as well?

True Anonymous

There are some funny comments, and there is always the question of what the comments would be if the story's roles were reversed.

But there were a couple of comments that suggested female and male equivalence, either with disapproval of that type of behaviour or understanding that what is acceptable for men should also be acceptable for women.

That's quite a move forward from the almost universal misogyny seen in the comments on so many stories.

L

Kind of different.

Back in college there was one girl I met, the first time I ever saw her, she was doing a strip tease in a bud of mine's living room. She took off everything, too, she was as drunk as a female can get. No sex though, the guys there that night were also way too drunk except for one, and I stopped him since the girl had no idea of where she was or what was happening. I got her into the bathroom where she threw up all over everything, so I got to clean up the mess and get her dressed. I couldn't leave her there, so I carried her to my car and took her to my place. Sometime before I got to the party someone had her, I got to clean that up too.
It was funny when she woke up the next day and asked me who I was. I dated her for 3 years while in school, and I never saw her ever drink again, which I found odd.
Knowing what I know today she may have been drugged but I never knew for sure.
Of course we slept together, way it was. Then my friend fell for her, same guy I stopped that night years before, and I was best man at their wedding. He had lots of stuff and I didn't, also the way things go.
I kissed her goodbye at the reception, she whispered that she wished it was me just before they left. They have six kids today and are happy and she doesn't mess around any that I can tell. We are still good friends, all the other stuff was just benefits. My Bud doesn't care, he knows I was with her maybe 100 times or so.
Whatever works is fine, is what I say.

@Funny comments

Yes, he would.

Hum

An interesting start for this story. Looking forward to the rest of it.

Wow, different and well done

having a slut for a wife is some guys nirvana, but not most. Most men dont like spreading the pussy around so soon in a relationship, nor the thought of their wife giving it up and getting it rough from their friends, let alone witnessing such.

Be interested to see how this progresses.

Most of you don't like the content, do you?

But this part of the story is well written, and it's a great set up for at least one following chapter. So there! I gave it a five.