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bypetiteistyping©
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Comments (3)
by Anonymous

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by sixpe03/23/16

Nice try.

I enjoyed the story, but it took a lot of concentration to read it. Sometimes I had to backtrack a few times to understand it. A few more commas would make it much easier to understand. You also switched between 'him' and 'you' repeatedly which made it even more difficult. A read through of some of the 'hints and tips' could have eliminated some of these problems, they are really helpful. Apart from the grammar I liked the story itself.

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by Anonymous03/24/16

Wrong

You NEVER leave someone bound for any length of time. Too many things can go wrong. Bad story.

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by Anonymous03/25/16

good story

great story line, it got my motor running! but could be much easier to read with improved grammar and consistant tense.

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